How do I convince my S.O. to go to the gym with me?

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ohmyshysamantha
ohmyshysamantha Posts: 138 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
I love working out, and I have a membership to planet fitness which is 24 hours so I didnt think going to the gym would be a problem. Boy oh boy was I wrong.

I study, I go to school full time (and failing 2 classes because I am just that awesome) I work, I spend time with my boyfriend and on monday nights I spend my time from 7pm-midnight shooting darts on the NODA steel tip dart league which lately has been my ONLY form of physical exercise besides the 2 miles I walk every MWF going from my car to classes and back to my car, and walking around stores pushing a wheel chair when the woman I take care of wants to go shopping. And I sleep. And sleep is apparently important for me because if I dont get enough I wake up unable to function the next day because it feels like I was just thrown off a merry-go-round at high speed.

Well it was suggested that I bring my boyfriend to the gym with me but I dont know how to bring that up without offending him
He consistently talks about wanting to lose weight and such but I dont want to push him. And I dont want him to think that I think he needs to lose weight or anything because I love him for who he is not what he looks like and I dont want him to think that I wish he was skinnier or more muscular or anything. I'm just getting to the point where I feel I have to chose between him and the gym and I dont want to do that so it seems logical that maybe during the 4 or 5 hours I spend with him* we spend an hour or 2 at the gym or something.

*We are in a long distance relationship kinda. He lives about 30-40 minutes away and we only get to see each other 2-4 times a week for 4-5 hours give or take at a time.

Basically I either need a way to convince him to go with me, without him getting offended. Or a better way to manage my time/sleep. Help!

Replies

  • WittneeT29
    WittneeT29 Posts: 47 Member
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    Tell him this part:

    "I'm just getting to the point where I feel I have to chose between him and the gym and I dont want to do that so it seems logical that maybe during the 4 or 5 hours I spend with him* we spend an hour or 2 at the gym or something. "

    That is honest, and not hurtful. You want him there with you because it is something you enjoy, can benefit you both, help motivate you, and gives you time together. It is an important part of your life, as is he, so why not combine them?

    Good luck!
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    He's a man. You don't have to trick him. We appreciate directness. And we don't over analyze every sentence. Just say you're going to the gym and ask if he wants to use the free guest pass. He'll say yes or no, and that will likely be the end of it.
  • timboom1
    timboom1 Posts: 762 Member
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    He's a man. You don't have to trick him. We appreciate directness. And we don't over analyze every sentence. Just say you're going to the gym and ask if he wants to use the free guest pass. He'll say yes or no, and that will likely be the end of it.

    ^^This, if he says he doesn't want to go, then you need to go anyway. Make it about you (which it should be) and let him know this is what you are doing and he can come along, for free, or not, my guess is he will join you without any drama. If he doesn't want to go, tell him you will see him in a hour or two. You want to go, so go, he will figure it out.
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
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    He's a man. You don't have to trick him. We appreciate directness. And we don't over analyze every sentence. Just say you're going to the gym and ask if he wants to use the free guest pass. He'll say yes or no, and that will likely be the end of it.

    It's true; men prefer direct, unambiguous communication and (for the most part) can stand up to constructive criticism.
  • sexikc
    sexikc Posts: 153 Member
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    I think you are putting way too much thought into it. Just ask if he wants to go and call it a day. You still need to go even if he doesn't want to. Sure it's better if he goes with but if he doesn't it's quite alright, you have to make going to the gym a priority. For me taking charge of my life my body and health is just as important if not more important than my relationships. In ur case it doesn't even seem difficult. Should ur bf not want to go u can spend 3-4 hours with him vs the 4-5 u spend.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
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    If you enjoy your time at the gym, then broach the topic in that manner. Talk about it like it would be something fun to do together. That's how I get hubby to take walks with me. He doesn't know that I suggest it for his health as much as I do for his company because I can enjoy his company while seated at home if that's all I wanted. :wink:

    Good luck! :flowerforyou:

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