Discouraged and Frustrated

I am feeling frustrated and discouraged. I started working with a personal trainer 2 months ago. In that 2 months I have lost 19.4 pounds. I have been doing great, following my calories and exercising very consistently, never gaining, always going down. But my clothes aren't baggy, and I just don't feel like I am losing it fast enough. I was knocking on the door of 300 lbs, I really thought I would initially loose weight faster. But I am sticking with it and will continue to do so.
Then last night one of my friends posted that she has lost 23 pounds in 18 days taking a new diet pill. In 18 days!!! I've been at it for over 60 and her she is just popping a pill and she has lost over a pound a day. I feel like the putz, doing it the hard way and not getting anywhere.
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Replies

  • mensasu
    mensasu Posts: 355 Member
    Was it African Mango? If so, that post was not real. Several of my Facebook friends have had that post show up on their page and then they comment that they did not post it. No pill can do that - I researched it also and people who were foolish enough to buy it (cause Dr Oz said it was good) were disappointed.

    You have done extremely well, just keep it up. The right way to get where you want is slow and steady ... much better for your health than anything quick.

    Good luck.
  • OMG, yes it was the African Mango Pill. I know she's been trying to loose weight so I totally thought it was real. And I feel like a total witch because I want her to loose weight and feel good, but 23 pounds in 18 days was insane!

    Come to think of it, when I first read it the language sounded like a scam, especially when she "added" that she forgot to mention is 100% natural.
  • Denise_Valentine
    Denise_Valentine Posts: 93 Member
    you are doing amazing!! i'm lucky if i loose 10lbs a month i get excited. slow and steady is the best way to keep it off for good. just make mini goals for yourself. like i am almost at one of mine. i just told myself i would get under 220. no time limit, just get there. and i'm at 220 right now! so it won't be long before i'm under. i don't know how long it took me to get here but it doesn't matter because i am here now! good luck and remember everyone here is rooting for you!!
  • Thanks for the encouragement Dee. I know logically that the slower I loose it the more likely I am to keep it off. I keep reminding myself that I am making a lifestyle change, not just losing weight. And if I keep going at this pace then I will be down 120 lbs in a year, and I am already 20 lbs into that goal. And when I write that my brain calls me a liar, 19.4 lbs is not yet 20. I have to be that strict because I have always made excuses and false encouragements for myself, that is how I got to 266.3 pounds.

    Thank you for the encouragement! It helps to talk to others who are going through similar things. I hope the hit your goal soon, what a feeling that will be.
  • mensasu
    mensasu Posts: 355 Member
    New Scam today is Raspberry Ultra, so don't be surprised if it shows up on your friends facebook page. By now with all these scam posts my friend must weigh 0!
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    I started working with a personal trainer 2 months ago. In that 2 months I have lost 19.4 pounds.

    ......doing it the hard way and not getting anywhere.

    Reread that first sentence. Read it again and again. Now, take that last sentence out of your vocabulary. Because you are obviously getting somewhere. Stop being self-defeatist and be proud of what you have accomplished. You don't need to measure yourself against anyone else (especially if it's a fake facebook post). Keep going and have the expectation to do the best that YOU can do, not what anyone else can do.
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    Remember you are doing this for you, don't get discouraged by others progress, jealousy is the worst demotivator ever and will lead you to bad places. It will also drive you crazy here in MFP since we are all losing but some will lose faster than others, I have a friend Dillon who started after me and lost like 15 lbs more than me, at first I was like WTF mate how is this but now I use him as motivation.

    The Hare and the Tortoise come to mind here, slow and stead you will get there. And Jill you done a great deal losing 19lbs in the past 2 month. Remember in the End the race is only with yourself no one else matters :)
  • mulderpf
    mulderpf Posts: 209 Member
    Then last night one of my friends posted that she has lost 23 pounds in 18 days taking a new diet pill. In 18 days!!!
    Did this pill cause her to lose a limb or what?

    You need to burn off 4472 calories every single day to lose that much weight. I'd be worried about spontaneous combustion if I was her.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,332 Member
    ....last night one of my friends posted that she has lost 23 pounds in 18 days taking a new diet pill. In 18 days!!! I've been at it for over 60 and her she is just popping a pill and she has lost over a pound a day. I feel like the putz, doing it the hard way and not getting anywhere.

    Meet another putz. You are doing JUUUUUST fine. Patience is a tough virtue when you want to lose weight but don't let others make you feel any less worthy of praise. You will keep it off...your friend wont.
  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
    None of this makes sense; you're convincing yourself that you have a problem that doesn't actually exist. You've been seeing a trainer, lost weight, and feel better. Actual results that you yourself are experiencing. And somehow, a FB post (which is probably spam anyway) overrides that? The very idea that someone else might have a different experience from your (positive) one is that devastating?

    Come on, stop it. Stop telling yourself that you're doing anything wrong. You're doing fine; hell, you're doing great. The thing that will stop you is this questioning and minimizing the benefits you're getting.
  • 126siany
    126siany Posts: 1,386 Member
    You are doing really well! Please don't be discouraged.

    How long it takes to see a change in the way your clothes fit depends on many things: where you tend to lose the weight first, the cut and fit of the clothes, and the overall % of weight lost.

    For example, a 20lb loss on someone who weighed 150lbs at the start will probably result in clothes feeling looser as it's a reduction of 13% . The same 20lb loss on a person who weighed 300lbs at the start might not be as readily apparent as it's a 6.6% reduction. Does that make sense?

    Hang in there. You are doing very well!
  • Please don't get frustrated. I too got a personal trainer about 10 weeks ago. I have been frustrated because I have only lost 13 lbs but I have moved down in size. It is really hard to get your head around the scale and how your body is feeling but just keep at it. I know it works.

    As to African Mango - it does not work. I tried it like a fool and wish I had never spent that money.

    Good luck. Keep at it and add me as a friend if you like.
  • AmberJo1984
    AmberJo1984 Posts: 1,067 Member
    Real or not... your weight is what is going to stay off... because you are taking it slow and easy. You will get there... and you will be so proud of yourself when you're done. Just keep up the good work. Keep looking and moving forward.
  • Well done on your terrific weight loss. You are losing weight consistently and healthily. Long term you have the best chance to keep the weight off.

    If it were as simple as taking a diet pill , there would not be a fat person amongst us.
    Your friend may have changed other aspects of her life also , which is helping her to lose weight quickly.
    Unless the diet pill has been prescribed by her doctor , it is highly unlikely that this weight loss is natural or healthy.

    Healthy eating and an active lifestyle work for weight loss 100 %

    This may seem hard at times but think of the long term benefits, you will look better, become fitter and feel much more confident.
    Keep up the good work !

    Your trainer clearly has you on the right path.

    Maggie Potter (Personal Fitness Trainer)
  • You are doing a great job. Sometimes I get discouraged when I worked out really hard and all I lost was 2 lbs in a week. To make me feel better I always tell myself at least I lost 2 lbs instead of gaining 2 lbs. Don't compare yourself to other people because all of our bodies are different. I wouldn't want to depend on a pill to help me loose weight for the rest of my life.
  • aftergypsies
    aftergypsies Posts: 248 Member
    I lost about 19 pounds in two months when I started. That is A LOT. I was 279 when I started. I've lost 87 pounds now and I stall a lot. At first, when I would stop losing a lot because it will slow down, I felt the same way you do. DO NOT GIVE UP! Trust me. In the end it will be worth it. I promise. Don't pay attention to pounds lost or how your clothes fit, if you're doing the right things you will see changes. Sometimes it just comes slower. Do you feel good after a work out? That is what should matter. =)

    You don't want a quick fix because just as fast as you'll lose weight with pills or extreme dieting, you'll gain it back. You wanna go slow and steady so that things just are and become a long term change.
  • LydsVille77
    LydsVille77 Posts: 126 Member
    Keep a close eye on what happens to her when she stops taking whatever pill it is... she will gain weight. I could smoke crack and lose 50 lbs in a month. But guess what, as soon as i stop, im fat again.

    19 lbs in 2 months is awesome!!! Youre doing it the RIGHT way, the HEALTHY way. Keep it up :)
  • Please, please don't let your feelings fool you. And please don't compare yourself with anyone else, this is YOUR journey. You are doing the right things because the weight is coming off, just keep at it. Sounds like you perhaps have reached a plateau, shake it up a bit, i.e. try a different work out; perhaps add a morning or evening walk. Don't give up, you've come to far to turn back to old habits now. Please know you are fearfully and wonderfully made!
  • frosty73
    frosty73 Posts: 424 Member
    Just to repeat what everyone else is sayin'.... 19 lbs is awesome!
    I've gained 5 pounds over the past 3 months because I HAVEN'T been logging my food, or exercising regularly. You are so much healthier than I am! And doesn't it feel great to know you are making real progress, whether it's slow or fast you are still moving in the right direction!
  • Lalouse
    Lalouse Posts: 221 Member
    Even if people were popping pills to lose weight, I can guarantee you that the weight will come back, with a vengeance, and probably worst than before. If you want to lose weight forever, and maintain once it's gone, you are doing the right thing!

    And great job! Nearly 20 lbs is an accomplishment!!
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
    All I can tell you is that it will be slow and it is normal.I have been at it for nine months walking 5x's a week and completely changed my lifestyle starting by only drinking water.You CAN do this in a healthy manner.I've lost weight before with diets and pills only to suffer it's side affects (hair loss and anemia) and then gained back the weight lost PLUS 30 lbs.TRUST me it will take a while but the benefits of how your body will feel is like nothing else doll!Do not give up, why choose to quit or fail when success is an option? Best of luck! xo
  • kenazfehu
    kenazfehu Posts: 1,188 Member
    I think your 19.4 pounds in two months is awesome, too. I wish!
  • MemphisKitten
    MemphisKitten Posts: 878 Member
    There is no "quick fix" for weight loss. You are doing great!! How long did it take you to reach your highest weight? It's not going to all come off in 8 weeks. 1-2 pounds per week steady loss is the best you can do. If you lost 2 pounds per week for a year, you would lose 104 pounds!!! Not sure if you have that much to lose, but isn't worth a shot? In 10 months, do you want to look and feel the best you ever have, or do you want to give up and then regret your decision? It is all up to you!!
  • CherryOnionKiss
    CherryOnionKiss Posts: 376 Member
    why do people that lose super fast are always complaining that it's not fast enough? :indifferent:
  • VorJoshigan
    VorJoshigan Posts: 1,106 Member
    I understand your frustration.

    For me, losing weight is hard because it requires so much concentration and effort for so long that it seems like the payoff is so much less than the effort put into the thing.

    That being said, you just have to suck it up and keep on keeping on. It's hard, it sucks, but it gets easier.
  • mlb567
    mlb567 Posts: 19 Member
    Be mindful as well that it isn't that your clothes are fitting the same... they probably look A LOT better on you.
    I can shove myself into a pair of jeans and get them done up, but it still feels like I am being cut in half :laugh:
    But if I lose 10 pounds and I can slip them on and they fit comfortably that is two different things.

    Just KEEP GOING! :flowerforyou:
  • I started working with a personal trainer 2 months ago. In that 2 months I have lost 19.4 pounds.

    ......doing it the hard way and not getting anywhere.

    Reread that first sentence. Read it again and again. Now, take that last sentence out of your vocabulary. Because you are obviously getting somewhere. Stop being self-defeatist and be proud of what you have accomplished. You don't need to measure yourself against anyone else (especially if it's a fake facebook post). Keep going and have the expectation to do the best that YOU can do, not what anyone else can do.

    If I lost/lose almost 20lbs in 2 months, I would be beyond thrilled! You're doing fine!
  • Wow, thank you everyone for the support. I did have a knee jerk moment of jealousy. I guess I just can't see the 20 lbs difference (it is officially 20.5 now :) and keep thinking that I am making it up or its a fluke or something. And when I saw the post all I thought was that I must not be working hard enough and am making excuses and should be losing more. I was expecting biggest loser type of weight loss. Wow, I really am a moron :)

    I do feel great, the best I've felt in at least a decade. I finally feel like I am in control again.
  • 126siany
    126siany Posts: 1,386 Member
    Wow, thank you everyone for the support. I did have a knee jerk moment of jealousy. I guess I just can't see the 20 lbs difference (it is officially 20.5 now :) and keep thinking that I am making it up or its a fluke or something. And when I saw the post all I thought was that I must not be working hard enough and am making excuses and should be losing more. I was expecting biggest loser type of weight loss. Wow, I really am a moron :)

    I do feel great, the best I've felt in at least a decade. I finally feel like I am in control again.

    Glad to hear you are feeling better! But you're not a moron-not at all. We ALL have these moments of doubt and frustration along the way, and we'll probably all have a few more. The human condition. ;)
  • imthejenjen
    imthejenjen Posts: 265 Member
    The BEST advice! so so so true! Do not compare yourself to anyone!!! love it! ;]