Teens and diet/exercise

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pawnstarNate
pawnstarNate Posts: 1,728 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I have a 14yr old step son who is my height and almost my weight. He holds his weight differently than I do so, he looks bigger and more heavier around the stomach. He comes to me often (every 2-3 weeks) and asks..."how do I lose weight like you have been?" I try to explain to him eating healthier and exercising is the only way you are going to lose any and feel better. Then there are those moments when he's going back for 3rd's at dinner time and I say to him "really? thirds?" or something to that effect. His reply to me is almost always "is that some kind of fat joke?" grrrr So my question is how do you try to help them and encourage them when they can't seem to get the fact that all that mountain dew, extra food, and lack of exercise isn't helping you at all? And without coming across as some mean parent

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  • _Cheyanne_
    _Cheyanne_ Posts: 97 Member
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    it doesn't sound like he really wants to get into it... yet. he could just be asking questions and playing around with the idea. but i guarantee giving him smack for little things like that would irritate him. maybe even discourage him! your best bet is to maintain your place as his role model, and if he becomes more willing, he will get more involved. but you cant make someone do something they dont want to do
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
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    sparkteens.com
  • pawnstarNate
    pawnstarNate Posts: 1,728 Member
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    @cheyanne - thanks for the input

    @adnini - will give him that web address the next time he asks me ;) thank u
  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
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    Exercise with him.
  • pawnstarNate
    pawnstarNate Posts: 1,728 Member
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    Exercise with him.

    tried that...maybe I go about it wrong but, even when he goes for a run with me or tries to lift with me...he bails out after a few minutes
  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
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    Saying "Really, thirds?" isn't likely to help him lose weight. Sounds like it is demotivating to him. How about taking him to the gym with you? Encourage him to be more active. Also how much is he eating during the day? My 16-yr old son sometimes will eat almost nothing during the day, so at dinner he's starving and so low on calories that eating 3rds wouldn't even be an issue.

    Also I get what you're saying - we'll go out to dinner and he'll want to eat healthy and analyze the heck out of the nutritional information, but then will eat junk the next day. So for now as long as he's increasing his healthy habits I don't sweat the bad habits too much.
  • tjmist
    tjmist Posts: 45 Member
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    You need to find something that he likes to do that makes exercise fun for him. Maybe he's not into lifting but running or the elliptical or a sport is his thing? There are so many different types of exercise out there, it might just be a matter of him finding his own niche.
  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
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    Exercise with him.

    tried that...maybe I go about it wrong but, even when he goes for a run with me or tries to lift with me...he bails out after a few minutes

    My son goes to the gym with me, but doesn't necessarily do what I do. He likes when I'm doing the C25K on the treadmill - he'll try and race me. He also likes racquetball. If I do the machines he'll do his own thing. I try and find some things he does like to do and do those with him, not necessarily just what I would do.

    Or maybe some non-traditional exercises. Like Paintball or Lasertag where you are running around sweating but not doing a set workout.
  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
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    Exercise with him.

    tried that...maybe I go about it wrong but, even when he goes for a run with me or tries to lift with me...he bails out after a few minutes

    You have to find something he likes, it doesn't have to be formal exercise, just get him moving.
  • EllyG08
    EllyG08 Posts: 194 Member
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    Exercise with him.

    tried that...maybe I go about it wrong but, even when he goes for a run with me or tries to lift with me...he bails out after a few minutes

    You have to find something he likes, it doesn't have to be formal exercise, just get him moving.

    I agree with this. Also, it might be helpful to have healthy snacks around, less soda. If the "thirds" he's eating are of a balanced meal, then it shouldn't really be an issue. He's a growing teenager.

    I think you should have another talk with him. Let him know that his actions contradict his interest in getting fit and see if he really wants it. Teenagers are so used to the instant fix and don't always want to put in the work.

    Good luck.
  • Gramps251
    Gramps251 Posts: 738 Member
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    He's a teenage boy. You just have to find him a female trainer.
  • claire_90
    claire_90 Posts: 99
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    Ultimately the only way a diet or 'healthy lifestyle' plan works is if the person commits to it. That can only happen if he's in 100%, I mean committed to the process not just the outcome. If he wants to be smaller but doesn't want to do what it takes nothing you can do will get him there, it's just not the right time for him.

    I know guys are meant to be more resiliant to these kids of things, but I have had problems with binge eating over the past year and for me personally the WORST thing that can happen is anyone commenting on what I'm eating 'really you're going to have 2nds?' 'haven't you had enough biscuits tonight?' etc.... All it does is make you feel more guilty, more ashamed, do it in secret and do it more because you feel awful.

    It's sad when you sneak out of home for chocolate and take away food when as a teenager you should be sneaking out to drink cruisers and make out lol
  • yetb
    yetb Posts: 2 Member
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    Show him Adini's profile picture... ;)

    Seriously -

    I have been cooking less. I mean - i cook all the time - i just cook Normal reasonable amount - x4 people. I double up on the vegetable portions - once the meat/pasta /whatever is gone - there is plenty of roasted vegetables left - and that actually works sometimes.

    I used to be a horrible - leftovers for 3 nights - or maybe just 3 trips to refill. Portion size was out of control. Now if its not still in the pan - it can't be (over) eaten.

    I oven roast veges or sautee green beans - they will actually eat it that way.

    My son has lost weight and leaned out simply because I've been cooking different. I have attempted to get him to workout - until he WANTS to - you can't make them.

    We DO make him go on our 4-5 times a week 2 mile walk with the dogs - that has made a difference too.

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