Why I can not do it alone

ley_La
ley_La Posts: 5
in Introduce Yourself
Hello there,

who knows that feeling that you can't succeed in loosing weight. All theses ups and downs of personal scales.

It is so frustrating to disappoint yourself, but it is much more painful to disappoint your partner too.

Yes, for sure, I know that I should loose weight only for me and not for someone else. But it is hard.

My greatest problem is to get up my *kitten* without someone kicks me.

So, please get in touch with me, tell me about your success and how you manage to persevere.

Hope to read you soon.

Leyla

Replies

  • KennedySKennedy
    KennedySKennedy Posts: 3
    I understand you completely that's why I go on this site and on youtube because doing this alone is miserable and depressing I have a goal of 109 pounds how about you?
  • mrso97
    mrso97 Posts: 147 Member
    its so hard to self motivate...this is a great site for support. have you done any exercise today? get off your butt!! ha! i need a swift kick sometimes...losing weight is so hard, but its so worth it when you see results..we are all here to hold your hand..or kick you in the butt! maintain your food diary..it helps alot!
  • kenazfehu
    kenazfehu Posts: 1,188 Member
    Funny; I decided I could only do this alone. I got on the site just to have a place to log, then I made some friends, and now I'm glad to have and be a cheering squad.
  • Anayalata
    Anayalata Posts: 391 Member
    At first I had the same attitude. "Why bother?" "Ugh... I HATE exercising"

    Then I realized that out of the entire day I'm only working out for 30min to an hour.
    In the entire week this only equates to 6 hours AT MOST.

    I'm not eating differently and exercising entirely for the sake of vanity. I'm doing it more for my HEALTH.

    It's not about "I don't want to", "Why bother", "It's pointless", it's about "Just do it."

    The amount of effort that you have to exert to maintain a healthy body is minimal. Once I realized this, it just became second nature. It became a priority instead of a chore. It's part of my life now. Every day, all day.

    Oh and while I did have some support from my girlfriend, I was pretty much alone in my efforts. Everything I learned and researched I did on my own. I learned from my mistakes and kept pushing forward despite some pretty crappy setbacks.
  • ley_La
    ley_La Posts: 5
    My goal is to achieve 165 lbs. ok, it isn't the final goal, but I figured out that it is not helpful if you are too ambitious. Today my excercise was to go for a walk 3 times 30 minutes with my dog, but I think my major problem are my eating habits.
    Does it really work do document anything your are eating?
  • thomasxaviersayles
    thomasxaviersayles Posts: 47
    When someone says something it is easily forgotten, when someone writes it down and prints it, it is not easily forgotten so writing down what you eat, drink, and your exercise gives you a record of behavior that can't be disputed if you are honest with yourself. I do it for weight training because it allows me to see my progress. With food, it holds you accountable to yourself for what you are eating. Remember, your goals are one day at a time and if necessary, one meal at a time. Make small daily goals and in time you will have achieved a bigger goal but be patient and work on it. It isn't going to happen all at once, nothing worth having does not include pain and sacrifice so just do it one day and every day.
  • kel665
    kel665 Posts: 401 Member
    I can't do it alone either. I get started, go OK then have a bad day and eat everything in sight to make myself feel good, then I feel like crap because I've just done that and it all starts over again. I have started a few times and lost a couple of kg's but then it'll be too hot or too cold so I won't go for a walk or I'll go out with friends and eat the same as them although they don't need to be watching their weight.
    I found this site, put in my details then had a read through the success stories and I was hooked! People just like me losing awesome amounts of weight without starving themselves or being full on gym junkies.
    I have gotten some awesome supportive friends on here and that really makes a huge difference, just having someone behind you cheering you on. I have been here 30 days and it has just flown by, I am making healthier choices with my meals and doing a bit of exercise and the weight is falling off. I can't see it yet but I can feel it, I have heaps more energy, am sleeping better at night and pants that I had to squeeze myself into fit nicely now.
    If you want motivation, you've come to the right place! :)
  • californiagirl2012
    californiagirl2012 Posts: 2,625 Member
    Hello there,

    who knows that feeling that you can't succeed in loosing weight. All theses ups and downs of personal scales.

    It is so frustrating to disappoint yourself, but it is much more painful to disappoint your partner too.

    Yes, for sure, I know that I should loose weight only for me and not for someone else. But it is hard.

    My greatest problem is to get up my *kitten* without someone kicks me.

    So, please get in touch with me, tell me about your success and how you manage to persevere.

    Hope to read you soon.

    Leyla

    Hello Leyla,

    This is a tough journey that is for sure. Build up your team around you. Build your environment for success. It can't be done on willpower alone. Sometimes you need help from others. I could not have gotten my success without the help of my husband and my awesome friends.

    Best of luck to you!

    Bobbie
  • diver71_au
    diver71_au Posts: 424 Member
    You need to force yourself until the painful becomes a habit. Eventually you will actually feel bad if you dont exercise. 1 year ago my alarm would go off at 8 and I would hit snooze until around 8:30 ....... now it goes off at 6 and I have breakfast and dress and still get to the gym around 6:20.

    I actually get agitated if I dont exercise now.
  • ley_La
    ley_La Posts: 5
    Funny; I decided I could only do this alone.

    It was a long process for me to realize that this would not work for me. So I am very happy to get in touch with other people who can understand my problems.
  • lonepoppy
    lonepoppy Posts: 4
    I know and I am going to make this work and I have taken to walking up and down when I am on my phone and it is working really well!
  • gennafer731
    gennafer731 Posts: 27 Member
    I started at 200lbs. and got down to 165lbs (where I am now) in 6months. I exercised 30mins to 1 hour every day, and did weights at the gym 3 times a week. My major problem was food also. I don't really document everything I eat anymore but when I started it was really helpful because I didn't know how many calories I was eatting. You will be shocked when you see some of the foods you thought were good choices are not at all. For example, I used to get the chicken sandwich from Wendy's when my husband would get the burger and I thought I was being good, turns out the chicken sandwich is pretty much the same as the burger and is over 50% of my daily intake for calories ;/ And when you start seeing how vegetables (that you like!) are almost no calories it makes you look at food differently. Once you get an idea of what foods are really good for you and what is not then you can make more educated decisions. To me bbq ribs are worth and extra few hours of exercise, but pizza is not ;)
  • melisaann89
    melisaann89 Posts: 4
    I think that it helps to log in what I intake. I am having the problem that I am not in-taking enough calories and it has helped me to get a little more closer, so that my body does not go into starvation mode.
  • csplatt
    csplatt Posts: 1,205 Member
    I found that the sense of satisfaction from doing it on my own - without the help of a man or someone who could let me down eventually - was great. My husband works on his feet 11 hours a day, so he can handle four Oreos before bed. I cannot. So I just don't join him. I make a cup of tea to sip to stave off the temptation. I lost 20 pounds of baby weight in one year, and I did it slowly. I set five pound goals at a time. After five pounds, I'd take time to eat a little more but practice maintaining. Once I successfully maintained that for a month or so, I'd tackle the next 5 pounds. Little goals.

    Once people start noticing the weight loss, it is easier to stick with it. The compliments really help. I also find that if I have a cheat night (like the spaghetti and bread I had two nights ago), I have a hard time not cheating over and over again. (Today I ate quite a few handfuls of chocolate.) It's best for me just to stick to the program I have set for myself. One good choice leads to another. One bad choice leads to another.

    One reason I did this on my own was to show my parents that it IS POSSIBLE to get healthy. I only had 20 pounds to lose, they have a lot more, but they don't try. I wanted to get control of myself before it got worse, and show my family that self control and hard work is totally possible.
  • strawberrytoast
    strawberrytoast Posts: 711 Member
    The whole thought of starting eating plans and different exercises for X amoutn of time ect can be mind boggling and put you off. Youve made a step coming on here.

    Set yourself a really small goal like -1 in 2 weeks, be aware of what your eating- log it on here to see if its too little/too much and try a small exercise for a short period of time as you dont wanna rush right into it. Go for a walk if you can for 10 mins one day, 15 the next,20 ect. Small goals are easier to reach and when you do it you'll get a feeling of pride and motivated to keep going.

    Its not all bad :)
  • ley_La
    ley_La Posts: 5
    Thanks to everyone, you are motivating me and help me to get started. For me the most difficult part is to stick it out. So today I decided to make it
  • natwebster
    natwebster Posts: 10 Member
    You have to make it easier to succeed. You're already in the process because you're thinking about getting healthier and losing weight. But you're beating up on yourself too much. Be patient and kinder to yourself and make smaller goals. We all probably got overweight by bad habits so you might want to coax yourself into better habits a little at a time. I started jogging in place for 15 minutes while watching Judge Judy every day. Once I got consistent with that I did it for 30 minutes. Then I started to eat green beans or spinach sauteed in garlic and olive oil (I love them) for dinner each night. Then I bought a juicer and use apples, carrots, bok choy, ginger & celery to make a nice drink every day. I don't pressure myself with weight loss so much right now because I'm trying to change my daily habits. Once I get consistent with the smaller steps then I adjust what I'm eating just a bit and increase my activity a little more. You can do it, just a little at a time.
  • amann1976
    amann1976 Posts: 742 Member
    Hello there,

    who knows that feeling that you can't succeed in loosing weight. All theses ups and downs of personal scales.

    It is so frustrating to disappoint yourself, but it is much more painful to disappoint your partner too.

    Yes, for sure, I know that I should loose weight only for me and not for someone else. But it is hard.

    My greatest problem is to get up my *kitten* without someone kicks me.

    So, please get in touch with me, tell me about your success and how you manage to persevere.

    Hope to read you soon.

    Leyla

    i know you are looking for people to motivate but until you find it within yourself you will not succeed...

    i hear dudes all the time saying that girl is pretty for a big girl i am going to date her and make her work out.. it doesnt work like that unless a person wants to do something for themselves they wont succeed.
  • SinisterMinister
    SinisterMinister Posts: 7
    Leyla,

    There is a man named Larry at my gym who said "Health and Physique are biproducts of vanity." Larry is a 72 year old bodybuilder. He is very fit and he looks great.

    Learn to love yourself. If you can really appreciate how special, valuable, wonderful, and unique you are, then making healthy decisions will come more naturally.

    Avoid people who criticize you (ESPECIALLY family members as their words have a lasting effect.) Your peers should be stepping stones not stumbling blocks.

    Be less critical of yourself and your appearance. Tell yourself you are beautiful and sexy, because you are!

    And listen to a song called "Wonderful" by Gary Go EVERY DAY!

    Blessings,

    John
  • ley_La
    ley_La Posts: 5
    i know you are looking for people to motivate but until you find it within yourself you will not succeed...

    your are totally right and I hope ... I know that I have flipped the switch in my head. thats the reason why I am here.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,258 Member
    I have lost and gained weight SO many times in my life, THIS is the only time when I have really felt confident this is the last time. Why?

    The accountability I have here....all my friends seeing what I am eating and what exercise I am doing. I am one of those people that works well under pressure and that is the kind of pressure that I need to push me along. Some people don't give a damn what others think of what they do here, but I do. And, in this situation, I think its a good thing. Everyone keeps me honest. And, in turn, I hope my success will spur others to succeed, too. :)
  • amann1976
    amann1976 Posts: 742 Member
    i know you are looking for people to motivate but until you find it within yourself you will not succeed...

    your are totally right and I hope ... I know that I have flipped the switch in my head. thats the reason why I am here.

    the first thing you should do is get some index cards and write some goals out.. down xxxlbs by xxx date... run a mile in xxx mins or whatever you want your goals to be write then down make them visible and read them daily.... also read then when you get down or unmotivated through the day if that ever happens
  • zaph0d
    zaph0d Posts: 1,172 Member
    Make progress, not excuses.

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