25 things women should know about men.

jefedesalto
jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
Feel free to add to the list if you have something funny and true.

25 Things Women Should Know About Men:

1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.

2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

5. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

6. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

7. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.

8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

9. All men hate to hear, "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.

10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.

11. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

13. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."

14. Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

15. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, you should be worried about him.

16. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.

17. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.

18. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.

19. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie "The Way We Were" twice, voluntarily.

20. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"

21. If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget. He didn't lose your number. He didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.

22. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you; I want to marry you; I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave so fast, they leave skid marks.

23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

24. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. With male menopause, you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

25. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.
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Replies

  • Lol thats cute
  • icimani
    icimani Posts: 1,454 Member
    LOL - these are great!

    This one really makes you think....
    23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
    I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.


    fk1zbq.jpg


    o0xa1x.jpg
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.


    fk1zbq.jpg


    o0xa1x.jpg

    Different generations, different standards.
  • melanie8289
    melanie8289 Posts: 161 Member
    lol I love this thread it really made me smile. Of course now we need a '25 things men should know about women' thread :smile:
  • kmarie0614
    kmarie0614 Posts: 102 Member
    Amen,

    5 things a man should know about me...
    1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
    2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
    3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
    4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
    5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    Amen,

    5 things a man should know about me...
    1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
    2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
    3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
    4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
    5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.

    Well, feel free to send the ones you don't want this way.
  • kmarie0614
    kmarie0614 Posts: 102 Member
    Amen,

    5 things a man should know about me...
    1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
    2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
    3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
    4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
    5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.

    Well, feel free to send the ones you don't want this way.

    you got it girly!
  • ElizaRoche
    ElizaRoche Posts: 2,005 Member
    #7??.. really? LMAO
  • jefedesalto
    jefedesalto Posts: 154 Member
    #7??.. really? LMAO

    Those things terrify me. They look like mini torture devices.
  • elexichoccyeater
    elexichoccyeater Posts: 310 Member
    It is not good to argue with a man when drunk.. Go for the kill first thing the next morning!
  • 12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

    SO TRUE! I actually joke with my boyfriend that he's my personal heated blankie :smile:
  • Erykah3584
    Erykah3584 Posts: 324 Member
    #20 is my husband for sure!
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
    LOLLL! Those are great.
  • Ta2dchic20
    Ta2dchic20 Posts: 376 Member
    Thanks for the laugh, I've found a few to be true!
  • erinxo13
    erinxo13 Posts: 892 Member
    :laugh:
  • lindsy721
    lindsy721 Posts: 350 Member
    LOL LOL!!! Thank you for that. Fabulous.
  • Chubbyhulagirl
    Chubbyhulagirl Posts: 374 Member
    I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.


    fk1zbq.jpg


    o0xa1x.jpg

    OMG, I love these. Seriously, what the F happened? I see more young guys walking around in skinny jeans and tight shirts than girls nowadays! When did looking like you shat yourself become a trendy fashion?
  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
    26. All men let go of bodily gases and think it is funny


    On a serious note,

    23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

    (I think there is a LOT of truth in this)
  • dawn_eichert
    dawn_eichert Posts: 487 Member
    This so made my day because my husband is so related to several of these....:laugh:
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    One thing everyone needs to know:

    (1) Heteronormativity is outdated :)
  • Skinny_minny_mo
    Skinny_minny_mo Posts: 1,272 Member
    brilliant!!

    :laugh: :laugh:
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

    Aren't superheroes just a male form of Barbie? Someone who has it all, is good looking, impossible body, amazing at everything, and you'll never be able to measure up to them?

    Barbie certainly wasn't the worst role model. She was a firefighter, air force pilot, and everything else.

    But this list was still very cute. =)
  • jnn0409
    jnn0409 Posts: 171 Member
    25. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

    LOL My favorite one, it's the truth when it comes to my hubby!
  • Cheri_Moves
    Cheri_Moves Posts: 625 Member
    I LOVE number 25... Sums it all up!!! These are awesome!
  • serena569
    serena569 Posts: 427 Member
    26. Men like boobies.
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally

    THIS!!

    I'll turn the logs over with my bare hands to get the last part to burst into flames if I need to. It might burn my thumbs and singe my hair off but by golly all them logs are going to burn!
  • Seriously, my husband is #6, #8, #10,#12, #14, and #25!
  • Aeriesified
    Aeriesified Posts: 206 Member
    These are hilarious.
  • mrs_schultz2012
    mrs_schultz2012 Posts: 395 Member
    I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.


    fk1zbq.jpg


    o0xa1x.jpg

    OMG, I love these. Seriously, what the F happened? I see more young guys walking around in skinny jeans and tight shirts than girls nowadays! When did looking like you shat yourself become a trendy fashion?

    THIS^^^ I love manly men, not guys that dress up in skinny jeans and tight shirts and dress more femanine that a lot of girls....GROSS