25 things women should know about men.
jefedesalto
Posts: 154 Member
in Chit-Chat
Feel free to add to the list if you have something funny and true.
25 Things Women Should Know About Men:
1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.
4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
5. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
6. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
7. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
9. All men hate to hear, "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.
10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
11. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
13. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."
14. Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
15. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, you should be worried about him.
16. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
17. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
18. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
19. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie "The Way We Were" twice, voluntarily.
20. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
21. If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget. He didn't lose your number. He didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
22. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you; I want to marry you; I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave so fast, they leave skid marks.
23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
24. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. With male menopause, you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.
25. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.
25 Things Women Should Know About Men:
1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.
4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
5. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
6. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
7. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.
8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
9. All men hate to hear, "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.
10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
11. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.
12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
13. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."
14. Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
15. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, you should be worried about him.
16. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
17. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
18. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
19. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie "The Way We Were" twice, voluntarily.
20. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
21. If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget. He didn't lose your number. He didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
22. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you; I want to marry you; I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave so fast, they leave skid marks.
23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
24. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. With male menopause, you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.
25. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.
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Replies
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Lol thats cute0
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LOL - these are great!
This one really makes you think....23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.0 -
I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.
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I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.
Different generations, different standards.0 -
lol I love this thread it really made me smile. Of course now we need a '25 things men should know about women' thread0
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Amen,
5 things a man should know about me...
1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.0 -
Amen,
5 things a man should know about me...
1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.
Well, feel free to send the ones you don't want this way.0 -
Amen,
5 things a man should know about me...
1.) chocolate and candy... romanced all the time makes me sick. Once in a while is great.
2.)dont be intimidated by the size of my truck. I am a southerner and my truck is probably bigger than yours.
3.) I dont need anyone to protect me i can do it my damn self... but its nice if he wants to protect me
4.) I think more like a man than most men do....
5.) I dont need thousands of dollars to make me look hot. I am damn sexy the way I am. And I dont need a compliment to tell me otherwise.
Well, feel free to send the ones you don't want this way.
you got it girly!0 -
#7??.. really? LMAO0
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#7??.. really? LMAO
Those things terrify me. They look like mini torture devices.0 -
It is not good to argue with a man when drunk.. Go for the kill first thing the next morning!0
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12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.
SO TRUE! I actually joke with my boyfriend that he's my personal heated blankie0 -
#20 is my husband for sure!0
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LOLLL! Those are great.0
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Thanks for the laugh, I've found a few to be true!0
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:laugh:0
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LOL LOL!!! Thank you for that. Fabulous.0
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I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.
OMG, I love these. Seriously, what the F happened? I see more young guys walking around in skinny jeans and tight shirts than girls nowadays! When did looking like you shat yourself become a trendy fashion?0 -
26. All men let go of bodily gases and think it is funny
On a serious note,
23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
(I think there is a LOT of truth in this)0 -
This so made my day because my husband is so related to several of these....:laugh:0
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One thing everyone needs to know:
(1) Heteronormativity is outdated0 -
brilliant!!
:laugh: :laugh:0 -
23. Men are self confident because they grow up identifying with super heroes. Women have bad self images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Aren't superheroes just a male form of Barbie? Someone who has it all, is good looking, impossible body, amazing at everything, and you'll never be able to measure up to them?
Barbie certainly wasn't the worst role model. She was a firefighter, air force pilot, and everything else.
But this list was still very cute.0 -
25. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.
LOL My favorite one, it's the truth when it comes to my hubby!0 -
I LOVE number 25... Sums it all up!!! These are awesome!0
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26. Men like boobies.0
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10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally
THIS!!
I'll turn the logs over with my bare hands to get the last part to burst into flames if I need to. It might burn my thumbs and singe my hair off but by golly all them logs are going to burn!0 -
Seriously, my husband is #6, #8, #10,#12, #14, and #25!0
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These are hilarious.0
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I found these pics on a friends page and it got me thinking, so I found that list.
OMG, I love these. Seriously, what the F happened? I see more young guys walking around in skinny jeans and tight shirts than girls nowadays! When did looking like you shat yourself become a trendy fashion?
THIS^^^ I love manly men, not guys that dress up in skinny jeans and tight shirts and dress more femanine that a lot of girls....GROSS0
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