Too many excuses...
kitxkatxkai
Posts: 26
My name is Kaitlin, I'm 22, 5'5, 187 lbs... and I hate my body.
I've been on this site for too long now to have the little results that I have had. Granted though, it is my fault. I can go for a month without signing on without even thinking about it then get mad at myself because I finally take a good look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see and the cycle starts all over again. It is too easy for me to go on the site everyday when it is easily accessible on my work computer, plus the app on my phone, and on top of that my boss has had tremendous results with using this site to help her in her journey to weight loss. So I always have the constant reminder to go on, but do I? No.
I gained so much weight after losing my mum and during high school (collectively around 50 lbs or more!), lost a ton at one point because I was unemployed for a few months and home alone all day so I would commit to two hours of hard dancing every weekday which I absolutely loved. Then my best friend moved in and now we share a room so I no longer have space to dance or stretch or anything, and even when I do say that I'm going to work out I get odd looks or remarks that make me feel awkward even doing so. I have severe anxiety so I don't like being by myself outside for very long especially since I live just a street over from a pretty sketchy neighborhood, so running is a once in a while thing, and once snow falls my usual trail gets closed down for the season. I would join a gym but with my financial situation it is just not even in the cards to be able to do right now.
My friends say that they support me, but we go out to eat so much and so frequently it becomes very hard to resist temptation. I feel ilke everywhere I turn there is either people doing and eating what they please or people who keep getting thinner and thinner and thinner and where am I left? In the corner collecting dust and butt that wont stop growing.
I have very bad anxiety most of the time and depression does run with it, and I'm just very very tired of seeing myself in the mirror and hating every single detail. I need more friends to support and guide me through all of this. Obviously this is too hard for me to handle since my constant quitting and joining makes my weight yo yo, and I know that's not exactly the healthiest thing to do for your body.
I guess I just feel stuck more than anything...
I've been on this site for too long now to have the little results that I have had. Granted though, it is my fault. I can go for a month without signing on without even thinking about it then get mad at myself because I finally take a good look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see and the cycle starts all over again. It is too easy for me to go on the site everyday when it is easily accessible on my work computer, plus the app on my phone, and on top of that my boss has had tremendous results with using this site to help her in her journey to weight loss. So I always have the constant reminder to go on, but do I? No.
I gained so much weight after losing my mum and during high school (collectively around 50 lbs or more!), lost a ton at one point because I was unemployed for a few months and home alone all day so I would commit to two hours of hard dancing every weekday which I absolutely loved. Then my best friend moved in and now we share a room so I no longer have space to dance or stretch or anything, and even when I do say that I'm going to work out I get odd looks or remarks that make me feel awkward even doing so. I have severe anxiety so I don't like being by myself outside for very long especially since I live just a street over from a pretty sketchy neighborhood, so running is a once in a while thing, and once snow falls my usual trail gets closed down for the season. I would join a gym but with my financial situation it is just not even in the cards to be able to do right now.
My friends say that they support me, but we go out to eat so much and so frequently it becomes very hard to resist temptation. I feel ilke everywhere I turn there is either people doing and eating what they please or people who keep getting thinner and thinner and thinner and where am I left? In the corner collecting dust and butt that wont stop growing.
I have very bad anxiety most of the time and depression does run with it, and I'm just very very tired of seeing myself in the mirror and hating every single detail. I need more friends to support and guide me through all of this. Obviously this is too hard for me to handle since my constant quitting and joining makes my weight yo yo, and I know that's not exactly the healthiest thing to do for your body.
I guess I just feel stuck more than anything...
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Replies
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You lose weight then feel happy, then you run out of motivation and go back to your old eating habits because it comforts you. However when you eat junk after awhile you put weight on and realise you wanna diet again. Its just an endless depressive cycle.0
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I don't know how long ago you lost your mom but you may need some help with your grief process. I'm guessing you don't have insurance if you're unemployed. Do you belong to a church? Is there a YMCA where you live?0
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Step one...Decide if you really want things to change. Don't do it for anybody else buy yourself. Regardless of age, gender, fitness level there is no way around hard work when it comes to changing your lifestyle.
I am a firm believer that a healthier lifestyle begins with changing your diet. It doesn't mean cut out everything all at once, but begin to educate yourself which foods will help fuel your body for workouts and recovery. And by no means do you have to eat things you don't like.
Let's make today the day where the excuses end :happy:0 -
I lost her seven years ago now, but I'm doing much much better than I used to. I would eat the entire fridge practically when I got home from school. Thankfully I have stopped all that, it's just the weight has been kept all these years now and hasn't really been moving much. I'm much more happier now than I used to be, I joined my parish and now I am even a youth ministry leader.0
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You lose weight then feel happy, then you run out of motivation and go back to your old eating habits because it comforts you. However when you eat junk after awhile you put weight on and realise you wanna diet again. Its just an endless depressive cycle.
So true!0 -
My name is Kaitlin, I'm 22, 5'5, 187 lbs... and I hate my body.
I've been on this site for too long now to have the little results that I have had. Granted though, it is my fault. I can go for a month without signing on without even thinking about it then get mad at myself because I finally take a good look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see and the cycle starts all over again. It is too easy for me to go on the site everyday when it is easily accessible on my work computer, plus the app on my phone, and on top of that my boss has had tremendous results with using this site to help her in her journey to weight loss. So I always have the constant reminder to go on, but do I? No.
I gained so much weight after losing my mum and during high school (collectively around 50 lbs or more!), lost a ton at one point because I was unemployed for a few months and home alone all day so I would commit to two hours of hard dancing every weekday which I absolutely loved. Then my best friend moved in and now we share a room so I no longer have space to dance or stretch or anything, and even when I do say that I'm going to work out I get odd looks or remarks that make me feel awkward even doing so. I have severe anxiety so I don't like being by myself outside for very long especially since I live just a street over from a pretty sketchy neighborhood, so running is a once in a while thing, and once snow falls my usual trail gets closed down for the season. I would join a gym but with my financial situation it is just not even in the cards to be able to do right now.
My friends say that they support me, but we go out to eat so much and so frequently it becomes very hard to resist temptation. I feel ilke everywhere I turn there is either people doing and eating what they please or people who keep getting thinner and thinner and thinner and where am I left? In the corner collecting dust and butt that wont stop growing.
I have very bad anxiety most of the time and depression does run with it, and I'm just very very tired of seeing myself in the mirror and hating every single detail. I need more friends to support and guide me through all of this. Obviously this is too hard for me to handle since my constant quitting and joining makes my weight yo yo, and I know that's not exactly the healthiest thing to do for your body.
I guess I just feel stuck more than anything...
I just recently lost my Mom. It is so hard. I did go to grief classes and it helped a lot. Now I am trying to find my way back. It is difficult but I think there is a time where we have to decide if we want to be stuck or free ourselves. I feel like I am still stuck though.0 -
You don't need a lot of space to exercise. You could do it in your room probably. If you google "how to lose 50 pounds," it brings up a web site where a guy shows you a workout routine you can do in the average bathroom.
You have to be willing to let go of the excuses. I finally did it about 2 months ago. I thought I had been out of control then realized that I had been in control all along. I've lost about 11 pounds since then, 7 since finding this site. It's not easy, but you have to show up and be accountable at least 80% of the time if you want the results.0 -
Very wise words, thank you. And you are right. The excuses stop here. Now or never, right?
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My name is Kaitlin, I'm 22, 5'5, 187 lbs... and I hate my body.
I've been on this site for too long now to have the little results that I have had. Granted though, it is my fault. I can go for a month without signing on without even thinking about it then get mad at myself because I finally take a good look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see and the cycle starts all over again. It is too easy for me to go on the site everyday when it is easily accessible on my work computer, plus the app on my phone, and on top of that my boss has had tremendous results with using this site to help her in her journey to weight loss. So I always have the constant reminder to go on, but do I? No.
I gained so much weight after losing my mum and during high school (collectively around 50 lbs or more!), lost a ton at one point because I was unemployed for a few months and home alone all day so I would commit to two hours of hard dancing every weekday which I absolutely loved. Then my best friend moved in and now we share a room so I no longer have space to dance or stretch or anything, and even when I do say that I'm going to work out I get odd looks or remarks that make me feel awkward even doing so. I have severe anxiety so I don't like being by myself outside for very long especially since I live just a street over from a pretty sketchy neighborhood, so running is a once in a while thing, and once snow falls my usual trail gets closed down for the season. I would join a gym but with my financial situation it is just not even in the cards to be able to do right now.
My friends say that they support me, but we go out to eat so much and so frequently it becomes very hard to resist temptation. I feel ilke everywhere I turn there is either people doing and eating what they please or people who keep getting thinner and thinner and thinner and where am I left? In the corner collecting dust and butt that wont stop growing.
I have very bad anxiety most of the time and depression does run with it, and I'm just very very tired of seeing myself in the mirror and hating every single detail. I need more friends to support and guide me through all of this. Obviously this is too hard for me to handle since my constant quitting and joining makes my weight yo yo, and I know that's not exactly the healthiest thing to do for your body.
I guess I just feel stuck more than anything...
I just recently lost my Mom. It is so hard. I did go to grief classes and it helped a lot. Now I am trying to find my way back. It is difficult but I think there is a time where we have to decide if we want to be stuck or free ourselves. I feel like I am still stuck though.
That kind of a loss is so hard to overcome. When I lost her I was home alone every day for a few hours because my dad had to work to pay off everything. So what did I do? Cry till I couldn't anymore and eat everything in site. The only reason why I didn't go then was because the therapist that showed up was just plain ridiculous. I told her to go away finally after two weeks of pestering me. I channeled all of my emotions through my artworks and writings, it made me feel soooo much better, it was a fabulous feeling! I think some people just aren't meant for classes or therapists. Then again I had a very bad experience with it so I basically taught myself how to grieve in my own way. Obviously part of that outcome was the weight gain though. :P0 -
You don't need a lot of space to exercise. You could do it in your room probably. If you google "how to lose 50 pounds," it brings up a web site where a guy shows you a workout routine you can do in the average bathroom.
You have to be willing to let go of the excuses. I finally did it about 2 months ago. I thought I had been out of control then realized that I had been in control all along. I've lost about 11 pounds since then, 7 since finding this site. It's not easy, but you have to show up and be accountable at least 80% of the time if you want the results.
See, this is the terrible part. I say this giggling mind you. But the last time I tried exercising in my room with my roomie (keep in mind I have about a 2 ft area to work in) I almost kicked her in her face when she was on her laptop. I gave up trying after that.0 -
You don't need a lot of space to exercise. You could do it in your room probably. If you google "how to lose 50 pounds," it brings up a web site where a guy shows you a workout routine you can do in the average bathroom.
You have to be willing to let go of the excuses. I finally did it about 2 months ago. I thought I had been out of control then realized that I had been in control all along. I've lost about 11 pounds since then, 7 since finding this site. It's not easy, but you have to show up and be accountable at least 80% of the time if you want the results.
See, this is the terrible part. I say this giggling mind you. But the last time I tried exercising in my room with my roomie (keep in mind I have about a 2 ft area to work in) I almost kicked her in her face when she was on her laptop. I gave up trying after that.
Maybe you can go for a short walk at night? To the post office? To the grocery store? Bike to work/school/see friends? Walk up and down stairs on your lunch break? 0 -
You don't need a lot of space to exercise. You could do it in your room probably. If you google "how to lose 50 pounds," it brings up a web site where a guy shows you a workout routine you can do in the average bathroom.
You have to be willing to let go of the excuses. I finally did it about 2 months ago. I thought I had been out of control then realized that I had been in control all along. I've lost about 11 pounds since then, 7 since finding this site. It's not easy, but you have to show up and be accountable at least 80% of the time if you want the results.
See, this is the terrible part. I say this giggling mind you. But the last time I tried exercising in my room with my roomie (keep in mind I have about a 2 ft area to work in) I almost kicked her in her face when she was on her laptop. I gave up trying after that.
Maybe you can go for a short walk at night? To the post office? To the grocery store? Bike to work/school/see friends? Walk up and down stairs on your lunch break?
By the time I get home it's already dark and I'm just too uncomfortable going outside alone and no one ever wants to go with me (unless it's out to either eat or drink). But I think from now on I am going to try and use up my half hour break everyday at work to go for a walk around the block. 0 -
Hi Kaitlin
Don't beat yourself up Kaitlin, you are gorgeous and you can do this. It is a mind set and you have to get yourself into the right frame of mind before you journey down the weight loss path. I am an older MFP, I find if I am not ready to get stuck into loosing weight I make so many excuses, so now my weight has ballooned, I am now in the right frame of mind to do something about it. I learnt of MFP from my daughter, and though it is early days I find it absolutely brilliant, it's amazing the amount of weight folk have lost being on here with the support of like minded people.
You have been dealing with a lot of emotional issues which don't help in the weight loss department at all, loosing your Mum at such an early age would have been so hard to handle. But it is good to hear you are feeling a little brighter in spots, if you feel like you would like an older MFP please feel free to Friend me and maybe together we can do something to turn the "I hate my body" into Wow I look amazing. I will understand if you would rather have a younger MFP, but whatever you choose to do, You Go Girl!0 -
Hi. I have restarted myfittnesspal today. I started several years ago but got lazy and didn't follow through. I have 50# to lose and I am giving myself until August to do it. That's a lot of wiggle room. Of course, I would love to lose it sooner. My motivation is painful knees, which I surely hope will feel better after I lose a few pounds. I am 5# lighter than my last visit a while back, so that is kind of motivating. Hope to make some friends on here to keep me motivated and accountable.0
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Hi Kaitlin
Don't beat yourself up Kaitlin, you are gorgeous and you can do this. It is a mind set and you have to get yourself into the right frame of mind before you journey down the weight loss path. I am an older MFP, I find if I am not ready to get stuck into loosing weight I make so many excuses, so now my weight has ballooned, I am now in the right frame of mind to do something about it. I learnt of MFP from my daughter, and though it is early days I find it absolutely brilliant, it's amazing the amount of weight folk have lost being on here with the support of like minded people.
You have been dealing with a lot of emotional issues which don't help in the weight loss department at all, loosing your Mum at such an early age would have been so hard to handle. But it is good to hear you are feeling a little brighter in spots, if you feel like you would like an older MFP please feel free to Friend me and maybe together we can do something to turn the "I hate my body" into Wow I look amazing. I will understand if you would rather have a younger MFP, but whatever you choose to do, You Go Girl!
Thank you so much for this. I just woke up five minutes ago and reading this has already set my day right! I would be honored to add you as a friend on here. I need more people like you with positive feedback like this. Thank you so much.0 -
Hi. I have restarted myfittnesspal today. I started several years ago but got lazy and didn't follow through. I have 50# to lose and I am giving myself until August to do it. That's a lot of wiggle room. Of course, I would love to lose it sooner. My motivation is painful knees, which I surely hope will feel better after I lose a few pounds. I am 5# lighter than my last visit a while back, so that is kind of motivating. Hope to make some friends on here to keep me motivated and accountable.
That's marvelous to hear, welcome back! I have bad knees as well but I believe it's due to thin or worn cartilage. Plus I have arthritis in my lower back. Can you believe it? Twenty two years old and I have arthritis. But I'm hoping that once I start exercising more my posture will improve again and I'll be able to live day to day pain free and without any struggle.
Best of luck to you my deary! Feel free to add me!0
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