Trying to Get My 10 Year Old Boy Fit too.

shanerylee
shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
edited September 20 in Food and Nutrition
So my son is slightly over weight, and its totally my fault. I need to do better with portion control for him, because he has an appetite like a full grown man. He also is a bugger eating fruit and veggies, always has been. Its a complete war to get him to eat anything other than broccoli and apples. Today we started counting calories for him to try and get a handle on things, with I figured since I am doing it, he would like to as well. I am so concerned about giving him a complex and poor body image. I was really thin as a kid and teenager and never had issues. I know friends that did, and they turned out to be very insecure people.
Tomorrow morning, he is going to the gym with me to "ride the bike" while I work out. He is really excited about it. Im not sure what level to put him on, maybe the easiest to start.

Does anyone have any words of wisdom?
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Replies

  • sunshine525
    sunshine525 Posts: 18 Member
    Have you discussed this with his doctor? I'm not sure I would concentrate on calories so much. Serve healthy meals. Let him have fun in physical activities. Let him help you set the bike level. If you make it work, he's not going to keep doing it. Be active with him, and keep it FUN!
  • MrBinkerton
    MrBinkerton Posts: 109
    Does your son enjoy video games!? The Wii fit is awesome and might help get him a little more active. I enjoy the games!!
  • TheMaidOfAstolat
    TheMaidOfAstolat Posts: 3,222 Member
    Take him to the library....they have some great cookbooks just for kids and teens. There are ingredients in some of them that he probably hasn't ever had...but he may try it. You could also check out a few books on world cuisine (try Japanese one night, Thai another, Indian...ect, we do this once a week).
    Teach him about nutrients and that in order to get them he needs to 'eat the rainbow'.
    Here's a link to B&N and their kids cooking...there are dozens of options.
    http://productsearch.barnesandnoble.com/search/results.aspx?store=KIDS&WRD=cook
  • Welllllll...

    Let me start by saying that my son is only three, so I haven't been there or done that yet, so I'm only speaking from that weird place in my mind where opinions come from. What I would think you should do with him for the time being is simply make changes. Don't put him on a "diet." Don't make him "exercise." But do start to refuse to bring the junk into the house, buy fruits and veggies, and if he's truly hungry, I'll bet ya he ends up finding at least one or two he can tolerate as snacks. Taking him to the gym is a great idea, just don't push him. I would think at ten he's still young enough that changes can be made relatively easily (compared to if he were fifteen,) and if you stick with it, then he'll have adequate time to learn how to make the right decisions by the time the choices are his.

    But no matter how you choose to go about it, I want to applaud you for stepping up and making the changes now. You said you were not a fat kid, but I was, and it was a miserable, hideous experience for me, and my mother refused to do anything to help me even when I would beg. Just by stepping in right now and making small changs here and there, you could be making a world of difference for his future well-being, both physical and emotional.
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    (I see these same issues in my 10 year old brother, so I speak from sisterly experience.)

    This isn't about giving him a complex. This is about teaching him nutrition and health. Make sure he realizes that, and make sure you focus your own thoughts on that.

    Check with his pediatrician to ensure you know what his daily caloric intake should be. Ask the doc what deficit he should be at with calories. Sloooooow weight loss for him is probably best.

    Portion control is important for us all, and we all are guilty of over-portioning. It will be eye opening for him if he has to do the math of the calories (and mathematically beneficially too!) while you cook together. He can use the measuring cups and realize what a true portion looks like, what a cup of food looks like.

    Let him know this is about HEALTH and when we are overweight, HEALTH usually equates to weightloss, but that is just an added bonus.

    Him riding a bike in the gym is healthy and teaches him the importance of exercise. Just monitor him so he doesn't overdo it.

    You know your son the best. You will do great. :flowerforyou:
  • shanerylee
    shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
    Thank you everyone. Some really really good points. He is such a stubborn debater and knows everything at 10. :) I wrote him a letter( i do this at times when we struggle to communicate because he really reads it and can't debate). The letter says how proud I am of him, he is a beautiful person inside and out, but we both need to make changes. He has seen changes in me both emotionally and physically in the last 10 weeks. I figured if I could set the example, he would follow. He's such a good boy. Im hoping the gym works out so we can have "special time together". He is very competetive, in the letter I challenged him to eat right, get fit, and make it happen! He loves a challenge. Phoenix, so funny you mentioned the measuring thing. Today he was insulted by the bowl of ceral I gave him. I measured it and we were both in shock how many calories two bowls would be. He is aware. Also I am sticking to the no snacks after 7, except fruits and vegs. The kid would rather starve than eat that. :)
  • balance9
    balance9 Posts: 160
    Wow! First of all, a HUGE congratulations to you for giving your son the gift of health. You have probably already heard the statistic that we are the first generation in history to raise children whose life expectancy is shorter than our own. Childhood obesity has skyrocketed in the past decade, along with type II diabetes (which used to be called adult-onset diabetes until it started turning up in kids) and fatty liver disease.

    I'll get off the soapbox and tell you that I feel your pain, because 4 years ago I adopted my 8 year old nephew, 30 pounds overweight, with a host of problems from allergies to eczema attention deficit disorder (according to teachers, not medically diagnosed). He was addicted to fast food and video games. He came to us with a bag of medications, and refused to eat anything except a plain McDonalds cheeseburger with fries (and he would pick off the pointy ends of the fries). He was raised on Spaghetti O's, Mac and cheese, and fast food. It was nothing for him to sit in front of a video game box for hours with a bag of chips.

    Bottom line...we took him off junk food cold turkey, he started walking with me every night (great bonding time) and I put a pedometer on him (let the arrows fly) and paid him $2 a day if he hit 10k steps. The only one who thought I was doing the right thing was his doctor. My friends generally didn't agree with me ('kids should be able to eat whatever they want' and 'how can you make him work out?' I also made him brush his teeth and take showers...all part of my responsibility to teach him to be healthy

    He's now a healthy weight. He runs outside -- on his own -- every day after homework; says it's fun and he feels good. No more attention deficit issues. Honor student. He wants to compete in a kids 5K in a couple of months. No allergies, no medications, no eczema. I still have to monitor the screen time, and bug him when he's had enough ("You're done...go play outside! I sound like my mom, but when I was a kid only the 'weird' kids stayed inside.)

    Skip the counting calories for now...there's an easier way.
    *Go 'junk food free' in the house. Just clean it out. Lots of resources out there for kid-friendly healthy snacks...just check the 'net.
    *Tell him he can eat as much as he wants, as long as its fruits, veggies, and good stuff. Have lots of it around.
    *No fast food at all for awhile. He'll probably get enough of that at school anyway (unless he packs a lunch!)
    *Know what you're making for dinner every day by 10 AM. 4 out of 5 Americans don't know whats for dinner by 4 PM; one reason why fast food outlets make so much $$.
    *Have him do some activity every day, preferably with you. Walking after dinner is great, or riding the bike, as you said. Hike on Sunday mornings, etc.
    *Get him outside as much as possible. Fresh air (and vitamin D sunshine!) is natures health supplement.
    *Limit 'screen time'. TV, computer, video games to no more than an hour a day. We don't allow video games on school days at all.
    *If he has a TV or computer in the bedroom, bring it out of the bedroom. We don't get to see our kids enough as it is!
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    Also I am sticking to the no snacks after 7, except fruits and vegs. The kid would rather starve than eat that. :)

    :laugh: Sounds like my daughter. She will go without rather than eat a dinner she doesn't like. It's your choice, kiddo!! lol
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    You have probably already heard the statistic that we are the first generation in history to raise children whose life expectancy is shorter than our own. Childhood obesity has skyrocketed in the past decade, along with type II diabetes (which used to be called adult-onset diabetes until it started turning up in kids) and fatty liver disease.
    I had not heard this before.
    It sent shivers down my spine.
    No allergies, no medications, no eczema.
    I experienced this in my own body, once I lost enough weight. The human body is AMAZING. If we treat it right, it will treat us well!
    Skip the counting calories for now...there's an easier way.
    *Go 'junk food free' in the house. Just clean it out. Lots of resources out there for kid-friendly healthy snacks...just check the 'net.
    *Tell him he can eat as much as he wants, as long as its fruits, veggies, and good stuff. Have lots of it around.
    I only disagree slightly with this because my brother will eat fruit.... too much fruit. And his portion control is non-existent. He eats twice what I do. And I feel that if they can visualize what a portion looks like and how many calories are in that portion, they are more easily able to understand how important it is.
    *Know what you're making for dinner every day by 10 AM. 4 out of 5 Americans don't know whats for dinner by 4 PM; one reason why fast food outlets make so much $$.
    I feel like you are talking about me here!! I rarely ever know what is for dinner. I know what is in the fridge, but not what exactly we are eating. However, I use to be good to plan a week of dinners, which helps with the grocery list! I am trying to get back to that.
    *Have him do some activity every day, preferably with you. Walking after dinner is great, or riding the bike, as you said. Hike on Sunday mornings, etc.
    *Get him outside as much as possible. Fresh air (and vitamin D sunshine!) is natures health supplement.
    Oh I wish spring were here already!!!!
    *If he has a TV or computer in the bedroom, bring it out of the bedroom. We don't get to see our kids enough as it is!
    I've always agreed with this statement! It seems that kids with tvs in their rooms don't spend nearly enough time with their parents. At least watch tv in the family where, where the 'rents can harass you!!! (And monitor what you watch too!)


    GREAT POST!!!
  • shanerylee
    shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
    wow. that is a true inspiration for me. Great idea about the junk food. Should be an interesting couple of days. We are leaving for vacation in two weeks ( a cruise with buffets). Its going to be interesting. I just dont want to be the "you cant have this and you cant have that." I feel like I am always harping on it. I dont want it to be a negative battle, its very frustrating. I feel as though I have let him have the upper hand at times and let him have too much say in a debate. Im going to try what you said. It sounds great :) thank you so much.
  • TheMaidOfAstolat
    TheMaidOfAstolat Posts: 3,222 Member
    Try some funky fruits and veg...star fruit, figs, quince, blood orange, guava, lychee, papaya, daikon radish, pattypan squash, Jicama, taro, cassava, and seaweeds. These are all very tasty and weird looking. Take him to a farmers market or Whole Foods (if there's one close to you) and have him pick out one thing he's never eaten and try it.
  • balance9
    balance9 Posts: 160
    You're doing a great job!! What an awesome mom. Don't feel guilty about saying "you can't have this, you can have that". We do it with all kinds of things. It's called being a parent, and teaching. It's easier to give in to our kids with all kinds of stuff, but our ultimate responsibility as parents...at least minimally...is to raise a healthy child. You won't screw up their head with 'food issues' if you're teaching them what makes their body strong, and what will make them feel weak and sick. A strong, energetic body is the goal...not 'thin to look good' stuff. I will buck the trend and say it's not child abuse to tell your kids what they can and can't eat, to limit junk food, and to encourage exercise. Someone on MFP shared a cool video from Jamie Oliver (The Naked Chef) and winner of the 2010 TED award...take a look!
    http://www.ted.com/talks/jamie_oliver.html
    Have fun on your cruise!
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
    what a great mama you are!

    one little piece of advice i have is have him make the salad and he might start eating it out of pride because he 'made' it. both my boys 'hate' tomatos, but i knew i was making rachael ray's tomato, bacon and leek spagetti for supper so i had my 8-year-old in the kitchen, chopping the leeks and rinsing them, pouring in the can of italian tomatos, etc and both boys ate their spagetti and wanted more. if *i* would have made it and set it on the table, there would have been tons of complaints and a struggle to even get them to try it.

    if he already will eat broccoli, try making a salad with broccoli and include another vegetable he doesn't like as much with it. for example:
    1 head of broccoli, cut off the stalk
    1 head of cauliflower, cut off the stalk
    1 small can sliced black olives
    1 bottle zesty italian dressing
    combine.

    or since he likes apple, start adding apple chunks or sliced apples to your lettuce salad, then move on to pears, etc. 'hide' as many vegetables in your food as you can. you can grate carrots, zucchini, squash, broccoli, cauliflower, celery, etc into anything that has a sauce (sloppy joes, pizza sauce, spagetti, taco meat, meatloaf, etc.)

    it takes at least 10 times of tasting a foreign food for our taste buds to become used to it. :) keep putting it on the plate.
  • lvfunandfit
    lvfunandfit Posts: 654 Member
    Deceptively Delicious is a great cook book for adding in fruits in veggies to normal recipes and making healthier desserts. You can also research substitutions to make recipes healthier, less fattening and have less sugar and calories.

    Also, have a lot of the good stuff around.. remove the junk. Put snack foods out in portions for the day. Plan his snacks like you would plan yours. It is possibly. When I taught elementary school and had parties all of the healthy stuff (fruits, veggies, etc) were the first things to disappear and I was left with all the junk (candy, cakes, chips, etc).

    Take soda out of his diet completely and limit juice. Buy low fat or non fat dairy products. If he likes hot dogs buy all white meat turkey dogs. . . there are ways to get the bad foods out with out taking away all of his favorite things.
  • Newme4eva
    Newme4eva Posts: 15
    My advice to you is to put him in sports activities and introduce him to healthy foods. I tried this with my 9 year old who is still a little overweight but has lost 7 lbs. since he last checked in with the Doctor. The Doctor was very happy and just told me that if he stays at his current weight that he will grow out of it...so I'm just trying to stick with healthier options and sports activities...Good Luck :smile:
  • emberd
    emberd Posts: 36
    My 13 year old son is a tad overweight too. He is super athletic and just hitting puberty so I'm not too worried in the long run, but because me and my husband are both very very overweight, I decided to hold a family meeting. We had a meeting and I told my husband and son my concerns for my health, and my husband shared his concerns too. We set some goals for the family, like we are only going to have a take out meal 1 time per week and we're only ordering 1 serving for everyone. No more 2 large pizzas sitting around for us to binge on. When I cook, I'm not cooking leftovers. I'm cooking just enough, and if you're still hungry then you can have fruit or veggies. We are also keeping sweets and pop out of the house. For fitness I put a chart up by the treadmill and each family member logs their minutes. When we get to 1000 minutes we get a treat. This month it's Wii Fit. My son has surprisingly been on board with the whole program. I don't weigh him, nor do I encourage that, but he says that he has more energy during basketball and is definitely able to keep up better. That's what worked for us. Sounds like you're doing a good job by helping him make some healthy choices!
  • ka_42
    ka_42 Posts: 720 Member
    I still have to monitor the screen time, and bug him when he's had enough ("You're done...go play outside! I sound like my mom, but when I was a kid only the 'weird' kids stayed inside.)

    Balance9 - I was one of the weird kids who stayed inside... but not anymore!!! What a great post! When I read what you said about our children's life expectancy is so shocking! There are so many parents out there that need to know that!

    You moms are an inspiration to me! I can't wait to be a Mom and hopefully make great choices for my children's eating habits. It can't be easy! I feel like there aren't enough hours in the day without having a family. The way I ate as a child has lead me straight into the path of the unhealthy life I've been living. I don't want to blame my parents, they didn't know any better really.

    At the gym I work out at there is an interactive bike with a screen showing a biking trail - that would be great for a child who is somewhat new to exercising!

    Good luck!!!! Sounds like you are more than on the right track! :smile:
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
    I SO wish my mom had tried to teach me more about nutrition when I was a child. I'm not sure she really understands it herself.
    In her defense, she had an insane amount on her plate, so to speak, and I do feel like she would try to control what I ate by trying to not buy a huge amount of junk food. But the problem was my grandmother bought me CRAZY amounts of junk food. She would tell me to hide it from my mom! I know she was just trying to be nice. She's 85 and STILL does this to me. Last time I went to visit her a few weeks ago I came home with probably 3 pounds of chocolate (all but 2 bites were given away, by the way :wink:). It almost makes me cry to think about it now, but I can remember as a kid eating like and entire package of cookies or an entire bag of chips for an entire box of Little Debbie cakes IN ONE SITTING. Those habits carried over into adulthood. Until 6 months ago I had *never* been able to reliably & consistently control my binge eating. I ate my feelings as a kid and I had a whole lot of bad feelings to eat since I had a less than stellar family life and was always teased at school (I was the smart fat kid everyone loved to pick on.. I guess everyone loves to pick on everyone, but when I was a kid I didn't know that & I thought I was being targeted). I was really active as a kid until I was about 10 or 11 and that's when I got really into reading and music and I almost never went outside for actual physical activity.

    I understand being sensitve about the possibiltiy of giving him body image issues. But, frankly, he's 10, he's chubby, and he's about to hit puberty. Body image issues are kind of inevitable. Just go about it in a straightforward and educational kind of way -- like you want to share what you've learned rather than making it seem like you're teaching him because he needs to learn since he's chubby.

    I think it's fantastic you want to work with him. :smile:
  • ka_42
    ka_42 Posts: 720 Member
    It almost makes me cry to think about it now, but I can remember as a kid eating like and entire package of cookies or an entire bag of chips for an entire box of Little Debbie cakes IN ONE SITTING.

    Oh my gosh! Makes me want to cry too! I once ate a whole easter basket full in one sitting and was sick for days! Wow! and my mom still wants to give me easter candy! I just keep saying "mom, I'm on a diet"


    Shanerylee- You should keep us posted! I'd like to know if he learns to like some new veggies! I could learn to like more myself!
  • pkgirrl
    pkgirrl Posts: 587
    Thank you everyone. Some really really good points. He is such a stubborn debater and knows everything at 10. :) I wrote him a letter( i do this at times when we struggle to communicate because he really reads it and can't debate). The letter says how proud I am of him, he is a beautiful person inside and out, but we both need to make changes. He has seen changes in me both emotionally and physically in the last 10 weeks. I figured if I could set the example, he would follow. He's such a good boy. Im hoping the gym works out so we can have "special time together". He is very competetive, in the letter I challenged him to eat right, get fit, and make it happen! He loves a challenge. Phoenix, so funny you mentioned the measuring thing. Today he was insulted by the bowl of ceral I gave him. I measured it and we were both in shock how many calories two bowls would be. He is aware. Also I am sticking to the no snacks after 7, except fruits and vegs. The kid would rather starve than eat that. :)

    I'm already 19, but I know I would have cried (happy tears) if my mom did that for me. That's beautiful, you're a great mom!
  • shanerylee
    shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
    Day one of my son getting fit, he decided he wanted to go to the gym with me. We got up at 4am(UGH) .Obviously we were the only nuts there at that time. He rode the bike and wanted to try the eliptical. I set him up for low resistance and he did great. He had fun watching the calories calculate. Also this morning, he measured his own portion of cereal in the measuring cup without me mentioning it. He's excited to go back tomorrow. We also calculated together what his packed lunch totalled calorie wise. Its very eye opening to both of us.
  • hanr
    hanr Posts: 20
    Hey there,
    I think it's great that you are trying to get healthy and help your son too. I suppose I just think it's a bit worrying to have a 10 year old on a diet and going to the gym??? The best thing you can do is lead by example, (which it seems you are doing, good job!) and encourage good eating habits and physical activity. I guess I think a 10 year old should be playing sports and running around with his friends, not waking up at 4am to go to the gym? While he may seem to know everything and be very 'with it', emotionally a 10 year old is not fully developed, so making a point of him being overweight may make matter worse instead of better. I wonder how much he is overweight?? Because until kids finish growing you don't know if it'll stay or even out as they grow taller? Limiting his calories too much may even impede his growth..

    Anyhow. I'm not at all judging, just offering an opinion, as my weight was made a point of when I was young and it really affected me negatively. My family eats poorly, and as a result I was a bit of a pudgy kid. Not fat at all really, but my older sister told me from a young age that I was fat and that if I kept eating so much then nobody would ever love me. This is extreme I know, but I grew up with serious food issues, hardly eating sometimes and binging other times. As a result I'm now 22 and weigh 110kg (245lbs or so I think?) and have only just started to take control of my eating. I feel that if she had never said these things I would be much better off, as I was a really active kid and my weight probably would have evened out as I grew, but instead I developed body issues and didn't want to do any activities like swimming in front of people that showed 'how fat' I was. I guess all I'm saying is try to be sensitive and aware that the things you say to a child affect them more than it does adults.

    Also, this is a bit random, but a great way to get veges in is to make spaghetti bolognaise with grated carrot and zucchini.. It's delicious!!
    Grate 5 or so carrots and 3 zucchinis and cook this with onion/garlic/herbs whatever you would usually put in. Let it cook for awhile with a bit of olive oil so it goes soft. Then mix in tomato paste, then mince. Cook another 15mins or so until the mince is cooked. A general rule I use is to put in a bit more carrot and zucchini than there is mince - it all mushes together into a great bolognese sauce and you can't even taste the veges! My sister even put in grated mushroom the other day (which I despise) and I didn't even notice :)
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
    I wonder how much he is overweight?? Because until kids finish growing you don't know if it'll stay or even out as they grow taller?

    Quite frankly, *NO*. When I was a child, noone seemed to worry so much about me being overweight (except peers teasing me). I wasn't incredibly overweight and I must've heard that I"ll "grow out of it" a gazillion times. And when I hit a growth spurt and hit puberty, I did slim down a little... but then I continued to gain weight.... Until I was 270 pounds at 5'4" tall.

    **My being a fat kid wasn't the problem. My eating and exercise habits were the problem.**
    I can understand where you're coming from, but this wonderful mother doesn't sound so concerned about her child being chubby -- What I got from her post is that she's concerned about his eating and exercise habits and educating him about those subjects. That shouldn't be worrisome. It's proactive and commendable.

    There's a big difference between wanting to focus on education and implementation of a healthy lifestyle at an early age and ridiculing a child for being fat.
  • hanr
    hanr Posts: 20
    All I was trying to say (in a roundabout, let's tell my life story kind of way) is that I think it's not quite healthy for a 10 year old child to be counting calories, dieting and going to the gym.

    I'm not implying that his mother is doing wrong by trying to teach her child about food and healthy habits, not at all. I think its wonderful that she's trying to improve the health of herself and her son. I just think that there is a less invasive way of doing this, as other posts have pointed out (getting rid of junk food, encouraging more veges, encouraging sport, limiting tv time etc). The only reason I posted my opinion is that she is obviously looking for some advice and other people's points of view, or else she would not be posting on here.

    Personally, if I was a 10 year old and all my peers were eating whatever they wanted and I was counting everything I ate I would develop a complex.

    And some kids do grow out of their 'puppy fat', in fact many of my friends did just that as we grew up, especially the boys.
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
    You expressed your opinion and I expressed mine. There's no need to defend yourself. :flowerforyou:
    I don't think there's anything wrong with teaching a child about nutrition. Calories are part of nutrition. It could be a big eye opener for a kid to think "Okay, I should be eating around 2000 calories a day... but this candy bar has 300 calories... and I eat one every day!" Or "Okay, this soda has 300 calories for one glass -- and I drink 3 glasses a day -- that's almost half of my calories!"

    But then again, I'm one who loves to know how stuff works. Instead of just being told what I should and should not do, I need to know WHY I should and should not do it. The explanation would've definitely helped me as a child.

    The situation doesn't sound nearly as extreme as you're trying to make it is all. Again, a huge difference between teaching and forcing or teaching and ridiculing.
  • hanr
    hanr Posts: 20
    True. Apologies. :flowerforyou:
    Though when someone says just after my post: "Quite frankly, *NO*" it does tend to make me a tad defensive! :tongue:
  • TheMaidOfAstolat
    TheMaidOfAstolat Posts: 3,222 Member
    You expressed your opinion and I expressed mine. There's no need to defend yourself. :flowerforyou:
    I don't think there's anything wrong with teaching a child about nutrition. Calories are part of nutrition. It could be a big eye opener for a kid to think "Okay, I should be eating around 2000 calories a day... but this candy bar has 300 calories... and I eat one every day!" Or "Okay, this soda has 300 calories for one glass -- and I drink 3 glasses a day -- that's almost half of my calories!"

    But then again, I'm one who loves to know how stuff works. Instead of just being told what I should and should not do, I need to know WHY I should and should not do it. The explanation would've definitely helped me as a child.

    The situation doesn't sound nearly as extreme as you're trying to make it is all. Again, a huge difference between teaching and forcing or teaching and ridiculing.

    I agree with this. My daughter is only 6 but she has learned how to fuel her body properly. That doesn't mean that she counts cals yet...she knows to eat the rainbow and enjoy trying new grains. She helps with the shopping and the gardening (we grow as much of our food as possible). She knows about excersize and enjoys it...she takes ballet, does yoga with me, and takes walks with me and our 3 dogs. That doesn't mean that she doesn't enjoy junk food every once in a while. We made oatmeal cookies with reese pieces last night (she had 3 cookies) and she drink one cup of coke at her Nanny's house every weekend (we don't keep it in the house but if she's over there then I'm not going to deny her-she usually asks for water). Teaching kids about nutrition and excersize is one thing but forcing them to do something that they don't want to do is entirely different...so is calling them chubby (I highly doubt that this mom calls her son fat).
  • sonjavon
    sonjavon Posts: 1,019 Member
    I have not read what everyone else has written - but wanted to quickly respond to you.

    First - call his pediatrician. Last year when I started MFP - my son (11 at the time) showed an interest in eating healthier too. I called his pediatrician to find out how many calories he should be eating. They told me #1 - they don't believe in kids dieting... they should grow into whatever extra weight they have (extremely obese kids being the exception) #2 - they could only give me a "range" - and the range was huge - 3400 - 4300 calories depending on his activity level (my son plays basketball, baseball, football and exercises for the fun of it) #3 - to focus less on calories and more on nutrition.

    If you're buying only good stuff and have healthy and tasty options for him - he'll have no choice but to make good decisions. Focus on "the family" getting healthy - not losing weight. Ask him to take a walk with you, we have awesome conversations while walking together. Play Wii Fit with him - my son loves to beat me at the hula hoop.

    The best thing you can do is be a good example.

    When I was younger (about 10) my dad told me that I was getting a little heavy. My mom took me to Weight Watchers... there I sat with a bunch of HEAVY people - and that's who I related to. Was I fat? Nope... not at all - I was getting ready to go through a growth spurt more than likely. But for the rest of my life - I related more to a fat person than to thin people. Fat was my "normal".
    Concentrate on "health" and "nutrition". Admit that you haven't always made the right decisions and you want to give him a leg-up on nutrition early.

    Don't focus on weight because at that age it's a constantly changing thing that they don't have much control over!
  • shanerylee
    shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
    Hi. Thank you for your opinions and your mentioning of your experience. Going to the gym at 4am is extreme, but it was the only time we could go, cause kids really arent allowed to be there when its busy. We get up at 5am anyway for school, so I thought this wasnt too bad. I am also going to tweek the nightly bedtime to make up for this.

    He isnt really counting calories as much as just getting a realization of making better choices and getting more good stuff out of his calories. He is involved in hockey and loves to play. We live in a remote area with no kids around, I try my best every weekend to have playdates with his friends at our house to fullfill this. We have a huge amount of heart disease and diabetes on both sides and I just want to avoid all that. I have never told him he is overweight, I just told him we both need to make better choices and get fit. He enjoyed the gym so much today and I am so proud of his enthusiasm, he actually started to motivate me. I just hope it lasts and we can keep it fun. HE has already been called fat at school by a very little girl, who funny enough is overweight also. so he is already self conscious. ITs my job as his mom to make things right. I feel responsible for him being chubby, and I didnt lead by example. I love him so much, I want to avoid any health issues possible, and really promote healthy eating so he can have the best life possible. Someone posted getting a pedometer and challenge him to take a certain amount of steps per day. I got one today and he is so excited for the challenge. Being random and getting back to the gym, he was really admiring some fit men at the gym this morning. I could see the look in his eyes. He doesnt have a male role model at home, so I felt this was good for him to see that it takes work and commitment and that the end result is awesome.

    Thank you to everyone for all your help with this. I felt so inspired by some of your stories, I actually cried.
    God Bless and Ill keep you posted on our journey
  • shanerylee
    shanerylee Posts: 298 Member
    Thank you for your words. I would never call him fat. Keeping it fun is the key. Im not forbidding foods, IM just putting it out there that there are better choices out there. Its my feeling that forbidding is not good. Variety is the key, and portion control is also important for us. Last night he wanted a second helping of a lean baked pork chop and orange juice. I carefully said, lets check the cals on the oj just for fun. It was 140 cals, and the chop was 120. I let him make the choice of one, he chose the chop :)
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