Please help!!! Cancer and Colostomy

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jaireed
jaireed Posts: 333 Member
in Motivation and Support
I just found out that my mom has cancer and it's pretty far gone. She doesn't want the surgery or chemo, because they say the only help is to cut it out and have her use a Colostomy bag. And even then they don't know if they can help. For some reason she'd rather die than even think about having this done. Does anyone know of an online support group or any information regarding this so that I can help her see that it will be okay? I'm so heart broken

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  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member
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    I have no advice..only want to say I'm so sorry ( hug)
  • jaireed
    jaireed Posts: 333 Member
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    :flowerforyou: Thank you.
  • chrissilini
    chrissilini Posts: 77 Member
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    I'm so sorry to hear that. I know the decision your mom made is a difficult one but ultimately it is her body, her decision. I'll bet if you google online support group for her type of cancer you'll find some. Check out the American Cancer Society for info.

    Cancer is a freakin nasty beast. I know and have firsthand experience. Has she had a PET/CT scan to see if the cancer has spread? Colostomies aren't always permanent, depends on the situation. I work in the medical field and see a lot of people with them. They manage just fine with them. I guess in your mom's case it comes down to the quality of life she wants to have and whether having a colostomy would limit that.

    I hope you are able to find some help. Thoughts and prayers to you and your mom.
  • kdward83
    kdward83 Posts: 32
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    Getting a colostomy is traumatic for most people. She is not alone in her feelings. The hospital or doctor's office should know of resources for counseling and support groups for before and after. Just call them.

    Praying for both of you right now. :)
  • jaireed
    jaireed Posts: 333 Member
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    Thank you so much. I have been searching for an online support groups. I'm hoping to find one useful and friendly as myfitnesspal. It took me FOREVER to find this site just searching. I wish there were a place like this for people struggling with cancer. I'm sure there is, it just take me a while to find it. It is all new to me. She didn't tell us until now. I know I need to get over my "it'll be okay, because it freakin has to be!" and respect her wishes, I just think that some positive online feedback from people going through the same thing would be more appropriate then all my good intentions! Thank you so much for responding!
  • dawson55510
    dawson55510 Posts: 197 Member
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    Sorry i cant help either. So sorry to hear this. Be strong
  • jaireed
    jaireed Posts: 333 Member
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    THANK YOU!
  • Faith2Bfit
    Faith2Bfit Posts: 33 Member
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    first of all I'm sorry.
    As someone who has thought about this... not because Im morbid but because im at high risk for cancer..
    I don't think I would want it either.. Especially if I have lived a full happy life. I would feel so unattractive and depressed if I had to have a colostomy I would rather just live out my days to the best.
    I don't know if that helps but those have always been my thoughts about it.
  • Vickitc
    Vickitc Posts: 5 Member
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    I am really sorry to hear about your Mom. My hubby has cancer (melanoma)and has been fighting it for over 4 years now, but has gotten worse recently and the treatment(trials) have made things a lot worse etc with kidney and liver damage. He has now started to see a naturopath and we have seen a change in a week but still a long way to go but she's very hopeful she can help, just an alternative treatment if you mom wants to go that route. Feel free to friend me if you want support or any more info about naturopath. Again really sorry for what you are going through.
  • mecaseyrn
    mecaseyrn Posts: 76 Member
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    www.healingwell.com

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