Hi Everyone! Need support.

hi you can add me if you like i need alot off support

Hi All

I am a 40 year old woman who is tired of being over weight. I have a lot of reasons for wanting to lose weight, the biggest one being my 8 year old daughter. I so desperately want to be healthy and leaner. I am a healthcare professional and I feel such a big sense of incongruence when I am counseling people on stress management when I so clearly use food as a coping mechanism. Recently I have been using a new mantra : "Food is fuel, food is fuel, food is fuel" It is hard to change years of deep seated thinking, but I know it is possible.

I know this because I am almost 6 years clean and sober and truly believe that if I can do that, then I can do this. The other thing that may seem silly is I have always wanted long hair. So I started growing it 2 years ago, and now it's long and awesome. Soooo I keep telling myself, your hair didn't get long over night - it took time and so will this!

I would like to lose 50-55 pounds, but would be thrilled with 35!

Just wanted to say hi. Thanks for reading!

I just want to encourage you yes you can do this. I was overweight and then obese all through my 30's and 40's. I worked my butt off at the gym and ran marathon after marathon while continuing to gain weight. I found out that when you are small (hint: if you are short you are probably small) you don't need as many calories as the bigger people around you. I never felt like I ate too much, I never binged, I never pigged out, I never sat in front of the TV and ate, I haven't even watched TV for over 25 years. It seemed like something was wrong. Nope, I just didn't realize I didn't need to eat serving sizes that are designed for 6' men when I'm a 5'1" petite female. I finally lost the 60 lbs at age 50 and have been maintaining about 1.5 years now, I'll be 52 early next year. Don't let people tell you to give up, this is what happens when you get older, menopause, all that crap. I had adrenal fatigue and a low thyroid and once the doctor helped fix all that I realized there is still no magic pill. I just needed to eat less and it was hard.

For me it's all about a calorie budget. I had less of a budget available when I was losing weight, more to spend now that I'm maintaining and all the tools I used for weight loss come into play for the rest of my life maintaining.

When you have accumulated excess fat, you have accumulated a debt. It is hard to pay off the debt (you have less calories to spend). If you are sitting next to someone your same gender and height and they are not overweight and you are, they get to eat more than you (have more calories to spend) because they are debt free. You have less calories to spend because you are paying off your debt.

There is no mystery to weight loss, everyone thinks something is wrong, their metabolism is broken, they have low thyroid, they have menopause or whatever issue, they are as unique as a snowflake, whatever. I thought a lot of these things once too but once the doctor helped resolve the health issues for me I learned there is still no magic pill. Most people eat more than they need to and are not at good at estimating calories as they think they are. Most people have a lower BMR than they think they do. The only way to know for sure is to go to a lab and have it tested. It doesn't seem fair to have to eat less and feel a little hunger. It's hard to face the truth of it, very hard. It's not fun. It's drudgery at times. But if you learn to enjoy your smaller amounts of food (necessary to lose weight, since the reason we got fat in the first place was eating too much whether we knew it or not), and rejoice in your victories it can be done.

Your body loses weight in chunks, not linear. I have found that you can do everything right and your weight loss seems to plateau but if you are patient and keep exercising and eating at a deficit (however slight) you will lose it, it will suddenly "whoosh". There are so many variables for the scale; water retention, digestion, hormones, allergies, sodium, carbs, water intake, DOMS, inflammation, the list goes on. People mistakenly think they lose or gain weight when they eat more or less because of these fluctuations.

Losing weight requires tremendous patience. You will not lose it when you want it or where you want it. The body does its thing. Some apparent plateaus can last a month or so. You cannot make it happen faster. You must focus on two things; calories and exercise. Nothing else matters. Scales and metrics don't matter. The day in and day out grind of exercise and calories are all that matters. It is not very exciting until things fall into place. You get your victories and you ride one victory to the next.

The scale is a trend tool. The scale is good but put it away and only check once a week and only use it as a trend tool. It will fluctuate, it does not matter. Take front side and back progress pictures at least once a month. You will see differences that the metrics won't tell you and it's that little bit of NSV that will keep you going until the next victory.

Wishing you the best! You can do it. -Bobbie

Welcome TrickyBird (love the name!). You did the sobriety (congrats) and you can do this too - the same way ODAAT! I know that's so much easier said than done however - I've been sober for 28 years. Quit smoking almost 6 years ago. And I lost 80 pounds 20 years ago (only unlike the sobriety & smoking which I've stuck with) the weight came back and then some after about five years of being slim :mad:

But I'm starting over again today. One day at a time. You're right - your hair didn't get long overnight, your weight didn't go up overnight, so it won't go down overnight. I decided to come here and maybe the support will help. But.... wouldn't it be nice if it was like the sobriety & cigs? Just put it down and don't pick up again. Unfortunately, we can't do that with food.

I'm here to support as well as be supported so add me if you'd like. Good luck in your journey!

welcome to the great support network! feel free to add me

You know a thing or two about taking things a day at a time and this is truly no different. Support is also critical to ones success in this area of life as well. I would be glad to be there to encourage and be encouraged. I joined MFP 76 days ago and have lost 25 lbs. Feel free to add me if you would like.

I used to work as a nurse and felt uncomfortable telling others how to follow a diabetic or low-cal diet and myself weighing over 300 lbs. It's like I know what to do, but don't do it myself. Thanks to this site I now know how many calories I take in everyday and that helps me stay focused. Also, it helps me to realize the importance of getting in some kind of exercise everyday. I have also found that having a group of supportive friends that have similar goals of becoming healthy can really help keep you motivated. Please feel free to add me for support and encouragement. My name is Kimberlee, 49, and I am married without children. I am currently physically disabled due to multiple heath problems.