Need some serious help

I don't buy into the whole eat more thing. Yes, eat more than a bare minimum you can survive on but if you want to lose fat you don't need to feed it.

Well, I'm no health pro and I'm relatively new to healthy living. However, what I have learned so far would lead me to tell you to cut back on the weights and increase your cardio. You may also need to reduce your calories again. Most importantly, I'd like to say GREAT job! You've already come a long way. The very fact that you still care and are still working at it tells me you won't gain all your weight back. Don't let the numbers get you frustrated. You said your butt is looking better and you've lost size. Focus on the positive and maintain. Really great job so far!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ

Ok so here's my situation...

Current weight: 157
Height:5'7
Body fat %: 18 (according to my caliber but I don't see how this is possible)
22 (according to a machine at the gym a few months back)
32 (according to a diff machine at the gym about a year ago)

Began at over 200lbs over two years ago, lost 30lbs using the elliptical and watching what I ate, took me about 3 months

Slowly over the next year I lost another 20lbs,not doing anything special, mostly cardio, some running, kickboxing etc Started using MFP around that time, started at just over 1500 calories (what MFP suggested for me)

Reaching 147lbs never reached a plateau, I was still losing

discovered EM2WL so upped calories to 1700-1800 because i understood the health benefits and logic behind it all Eventually upped it to 1900-2000, consistently gaining to about 153lbs (inches not changing)

Eventually got frustrated with the gaining so a friend suggested another theory so I began eating just over 1700 for a couple months and pretty much maintained.

Added in a lot more weight training and have basically lost 3 inches off my calves and that's about it (obviously if gotten stronger but nothing visibly different ), lifting heavy less reps etc, even had a trainer for a bit who taught me what to do/how to do it

So I'm very frustrated with what's going on so just over a month ago I upped my calories to 1900 again gaining another 2lbs 155now

then I got a bodymedia fit about 2 weeks ago which told me I was burning about 2700-3000 calories a day so now iv upped my calories once again too 2200-2400 still continuing with my weight training and now I'm up to 157lbs gained an inch under my bust and in my arms and see some more chin then I used to have.

I think I'm doing everything right, I'm eating healthy (with the exception of a couple weekends away although I try to make good choices)

I feel like other people see there muscles and bodies change so much faster then me, iv been stuck for countless months and now I'm just gaining, gaining, gaining.

I do not rely on the scale, I dont let it depress me I just feel like if I'm consistently gaining with my inches barely changing (changing for the worse recently) then I'm obviously getting bigger, I didn't want to type out all my inches, used scale weight to demonstrate my struggles

Yes iv gotten stronger (for example i started at 8lb bicep curls and am now at 20lbs) but that's taken like 6months, I don't think it's possible to have gained 10lbs in muscle and not seen any change in my body.

(But I do believe my butt is looking nicer and fuller I would like to make my legs and butt bigger)

There is absolutely no way I can handle gaining all my weight back, my self esteem and wallet can't handle it

I'm just so lost, I need help seriously, any suggestions? Words of encouragement? Ideas? Related experiences? :huh: :sad: :yawn: :noway: :grumble: :explode:

It's really about calories when you gain fat. The calorie burns listed in HRM are highly over rated. I learned this the hard way lifting heavy and running marathon after marathon while still gaining weight for 15 years, the weight piled on year after year no matter how hard I worked. Everyone is different but for me it was too many calories.

Even if you are not into Intermittent Fasting this article points out the myths of starvation mode and "bulking" http://www.leangains.com/2010/10/top-ten-fasting-myths-debunked.html

As does this link http://www.venusindex.com/dangerous-bulking-myth/

Your BMR could be lower than you think. You could go to a lab and have this tested. It's the only way to know for sure.

There is no mystery to weight loss, everyone thinks something is wrong, their metabolism is broken, they have low thyroid, they have menopause or whatever issue, they are as unique as a snowflake, whatever. I thought a lot of these things once too but once the doctor helped resolve the health issues for me I learned there is still no magic pill. Most people eat more than they need to and are not at good at estimating calories as they think they are. Most people have a lower BMR than they think they do. The only way to know for sure is to go to a lab and have it tested. It doesn't seem fair to have to eat less and feel a little hunger. It's hard to face the truth of it, very hard. It's not fun. It's drudgery at times. But if you learn to enjoy your smaller amounts of food (necessary to lose weight, since the reason we got fat in the first place was eating too much whether we knew it or not), and rejoice in your victories it can be done.

All I can do is share what worked for me. I achieved my goal at age 50 after beating my head against the wall for 15 years. Yeah anyone can do it, but I can tell you that you are up against a lot when you are older and I believe females have some unique issue to face with hormones and such. The sooner you can get a handle on it the better. DO NOT GIVE UP. As I got older and the weight piled on (and I didn't feel I was eating too much!) everyone kept telling me to give up, this is what happens when you get older. I'm small, and I didn't realize how small I was until I lost the weight. Everyone said I had big bones. I looked hefty because I worked out. Once I lost the weight I realized how small I really was and that small people don't need to eat as much as big people. HINT: If you are short you are probably small.

Your body loses weight in chunks, not linear. I have found that you can do everything right and your weight loss seems to plateau but if you are patient and keep exercising and eating at a deficit (however slight) you will lose it, it will suddenly "whoosh". There are so many variables for the scale; water retention, digestion, hormones, allergies, sodium, carbs, water intake, DOMS, inflammation, the list goes on. People mistakenly think they lose or gain weight when they eat more or less because of these fluctuations.

Losing weight requires tremendous patience. You will not lose it when you want it or where you want it. The body does its thing. Some apparent plateaus can last a month or so. You cannot make it happen faster. You must focus on two things; calories and exercise. Nothing else matters. Scales and metrics don't matter. The day in and day out grind of exercise and calories are all that matters. It is not very exciting until things fall into place. You get your victories and you ride one victory to the next.

The scale is a trend tool. The scale is good but put it away and only check once a week and only use it as a trend tool. It will fluctuate, it does not matter. Take front side and back progress pictures at least once a month. You will see differences that the metrics won't tell you and it's that little bit of NSV that will keep you going until the next victory.

To say eat more is wrong.

To say eat less is wrong.

To find the exact calories needed for YOU to be in a healthy sustainable calorie deficit is the right answer. Wait, if you need to adjust by 100 do it, wait, adjust, wait, adjust, wait. The tortoise wins this race.

All that matters is calories. A healthy balanced diet within a calorie budget for a deficit that is right for YOU is all that matters for weight loss. Don't make it complicated.


Also people play mental accounting games with calories just like with finances. Make steps to make sure you are making accurate measurements. Packaged foods can have MORE than they say but not less (they get in trouble if less so they would rather error with MORE).

If you typically intake sodium at a certain rate your body adjusts, but if you make a sudden change then you will see a spike.

Exercise is for making your lean body mass pretty (especially lifting weights) for when the fat is gone. Losing fat with no muscle is ugly and cardio alone will not make you pretty. You cannot out exercise too many calories.

It really is about calories. I tell people this all the time and they say "Well if calories are all that matter why do you eat so clean???!!" Well, because it makes me feel better, sleep better, and perform better at my sports.

Too many changes at once can be hard on some people. I've always eaten healthy so it easy for me to simply eat less. Eating at a calorie deficit is hard on people; even a small deficit puts your body in a state of flux with hormones and such. Everyone is different. Some people can handle a deeper calorie deficit than others, this is not right or wrong, it just is. Stress in your life affects your hunger hormones; lack of sleep, fatigue, job stress, family stress, financial stress, etc. Add in emotional eating issues and it gets even more complicated. Most people can only handle so much change/stress at once, they try to do too much and fail. Sometimes it might be a better strategy to eat at maintenance and make some small changes first, it really depends on how much stress you are taking in at the moment.

What is the exact number of calories for you?

We’ve been trying to figure out an exact NUMBER of calories that everyone should be eating, without recognizing that everyone is slightly different. In truth, the calories aren’t the end game. Your body is. So the EXACT amount of Calories that are right for you is the EXACT amount that will allow you to maintain your ideal bodyweight no matter what some calculator or chart says.

In other words, an online calculator might tell you that you need to eat 2,500 calories
per day to maintain your ideal bodyweight. But the only way to know for sure if this is
the right amount for you is to test it out. If you gain weight or can’t lose weight eating
that much, then you know you need to eat less to lose weight no matter how many
calculators and text books say otherwise.

This doesn’t mean your metabolism is broken, it just means the estimate of your needs
was just a bit off.

-John Barban (The Body Centric Calorie Guide from the Venus Index and Adonis Index Manuals)

The good thing is you don't have to worry about the starvation mode myth if you are fat. Only skinny people have to worry about starvation mode. It does not mean you have the capability to eat at a large calorie deficit if you have emotional eating disorders or other issues going on, but at least you don't have to be afraid of it anymore.

The Theory of Fat Availability:
•There is a set amount of fat that can be released from a fat cell.
•The more fat you have, the more fat can be used as a fuel when dieting.
•The less fat you have, the less fat can be used as a fuel when dieting.
•Towards the end of a transformation, when body fat is extremely low you
may not have enough fat to handle a large caloric deficit anymore.

At the extreme low end, when your body fat cannot ‘keep up’ with the energy deficit
you've imposed on your body, the energy MUST come from SOMEWHERE. This is
when you are at risk of losing lean body mass during dieting (commonly referred to
as ‘starvation mode’). This happens at extremely low levels of body fat, under 6% in
men and 12% in women [Friedl K.E. J Appl Phsiol, 1994].

-Brad Pilon and John Barban (from The Reverse Taper Diet in The Adonis Index and Venus Index manuals)

Lifting weights is KEY. I recently had my DXA scan done and at 51.5 years of age I have the bone density of a super athletic 30 year old. That is a direct result of lifting for over 30 years. Now if that is not scientific proof that lifting weights keeps you younger I don't know what is! Also I believe it is why most people think I look much younger than I really am.

Start lifting now, lift heavy and change it up often, find a lot of weight routines with free weights, make it fun, embrace it, make it part of your life. Only 3 days a week is all it would take. Crank up your tunes and learn to love it, because your body will love it and it will make your quality of life better in many ways, especially when you get older like me.

Because of this I don't have to worry about osteoporosis. If you wait until you are older and your bones start to deteriorate it's a bit too late, you can't get back what you lost, and you can only start a resistance routine that will prevent further damage.

If you are female you don't have the hormones to get big naturally. I lift heavy and I'm still really tiny. My lean body mass is only 104 lbs and that is fairly heavy for a 5'1" female, and quite a bit of this is due to my having very dense bones from 30 years of lifting, not all muscle, and I'm still quite tiny.

My muscles really are not that big, but they show a lot of definition because I'm quite lean. If I gained some fat then I would have a softer more toned look (which is OKAY too!). Then if I gained more fat I would look bulky and hefty like I did most of my life until last year. YOU CAN HAVE WHATEVER YOU WANT. Lean and ripped, soft and toned, or hefty, it all depends on how much fat you leave on your body. Calories are the only thing that changes fat. Exercise is for changing or maintaining your lean body mass only. Lifting weights will give you the best bang for your buck for shaping your body. I finally changed my shape by putting lifting first and cardio 2nd. You cannot out exercise too many calories.