Avoiding ranting at other people!

foxombie
foxombie Posts: 16
in Food and Nutrition
Today I was talking with a friend about losing weight; I told her the way the calorie plan works on MFP and said that I'm eating 1200+ calories a day (I'm only 5'1 so it's a fine amount, I believe - but I've got a heart rate checker that I will use to work out EXACTLY how many calories I burn during a rest day and see if I have to re-judge a sensible calorie intake!). Plus I'm eating back whatever exercise calories MFP grants me, too - if I didn't I think I'd be a very unhappy person indeed!

Anyway, my friend said, "1200 calories a day? That's a LOT if you're trying to lose weight!"
I was like, "WTF?"

She said, "I only eat 1000 a day if I'm dieting. It works, I lost 7 pounds last time!"

I resisted the urge to ask her if she knew how much of what she lost was muscle rather than fat, or if she did any exercise to maintain her muscle. But I try not to rant at other people about their life choices. I think I may avoid talking about MFP (even though I love it) to the uninitiated.

What kind of things do your friends who don't use MFP or (in your opinion) don't know a sensible way to lose weight think about what you're doing? What do you say to them? As I said, I think I'll just stop talking about it, it isn't my right or job to lecture anyone..!

Replies

  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
    As I said, I think I'll just stop talking about it, it isn't my right or job to lecture anyone..!

    Avoiding all such conversations is the best course of action
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    Generally I only talk about if I'm asked.

    Most of my extended family is obese and even when the topic of weight loss comes up, I do not offer feedback unless I am asked a question directly.
  • foxombie
    foxombie Posts: 16
    Nice to be able to talk about it on here though. :D
  • FitBeto
    FitBeto Posts: 2,121 Member
    Agree. Everyone's an expert, so not really any of my business unless they come asking.
  • melsinct
    melsinct Posts: 3,512 Member
    I don't talk about it unless asked. As I lost weight, coworkers especially would ask what my "secret" was. Most lost interest when I revealed my "secret" was eating less calories and exercising more.

    One particular coworker sounds like your friend. She is always on whatever the latest diet is (Atkins, SlimFast, etc.), then she gains back a little weight, then finds a new diet...lather, rinse, repeat. She isn't interested in a sustainable way to lose weight and would rather keep trying different diets. No one likes to hear a lecture so I keep quiet. She asked how I did it, I told her, and she chose a different path (or multiple paths).
  • foxombie
    foxombie Posts: 16
    Part of the frustration for me is being on a fashion course, where there is a lot of attitude of loathing exercise and also the desired image is looking skinny over... well, lean and muscular. So there are a lot of funny ideas rattling around my peers. :) Never mind. I shall ignore it.
  • Unknown
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  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    I personally have told only 1 person who I was absolutely sure would support me about MFP and how it works. I do not and will not tell anyone.

    My family, which is full of doctors btw, are telling me to basically become anorexic or get surgery to get thin. That is without discussing my weight loss. I do not argue. I just

    "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f*** you were gonna do anyway." -Robert Downey Jr.
  • foxombie
    foxombie Posts: 16
    I get really grumpy when I'm hungry. I am managing perfectly okay on the calorie reduction I'm using, but I know that if I even dared to eat any less, it would be unfair not just to my body, but also to the people around me... :tongue:

    Edit: taunto, doctors are telling you that?!
    My family has doctors too but one of them is a powerlifter and she's great for nutrition advice. :D
  • eileenchristine
    eileenchristine Posts: 228 Member
    You are doing this for you and its a lifestyle, not a "diet". To hell with her. Do the Robert Downey quote! I like it. Smile and then do what you are going to do. I see alot of people going nuts exercising and eating exactly. Good for them. What I am doing is working for me, I know as I lose more will have to do some changes but for now this works great. Log my food, move some and I lose weight. If in a couple months I am not losing weight will then change the focus, tweak it or whatever it takes.

    I belong to TOPs for my weigh in (don't have a scale) and these women are not very successful at their weight loss, but at least they have stopped gaining and make small progress. Have tried to share that they need to record their food and they just look at my like I am nuts. Still love em dearly, but we each have our own journey. I am just going to keep making steps on mine and respect others choices.

    You are doing great!
    Namaste
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,148 Member
    People who realize I'm losing weight enjoy telling me that I'm doing it wrong. I tell them that this tasty bowl of pasta is the one thing keeping a knife out of their chest.
  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member


    "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f*** you were gonna do anyway." -Robert Downey Jr.


    This ^^^
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
    Generally I only talk about if I'm asked.

    Most of my extended family is obese and even when the topic of weight loss comes up, I do not offer feedback unless I am asked a question directly.

    This exactly....even more awkward is when they're making fat jokes....:huh:
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
    "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f*** you were gonna do anyway." -Robert Downey Jr.

    :love: :drinker: Have seen this quote before and love it
  • crazyellybean
    crazyellybean Posts: 999 Member
    As I said, I think I'll just stop talking about it, it isn't my right or job to lecture anyone..!


    Exactly it's not... and everyone's body's work differently, so what might work for you might not work for someone else. So it's always best to just share your knowledge and move on.. only they will know what works for them and won't work for them.
  • AllonsYtotheTardis
    AllonsYtotheTardis Posts: 16,947 Member
    People who realize I'm losing weight enjoy telling me that I'm doing it wrong. I tell them that this tasty bowl of pasta is the one thing keeping a knife out of their chest.

    +1
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    Generally I only talk about if I'm asked.

    Most of my extended family is obese and even when the topic of weight loss comes up, I do not offer feedback unless I am asked a question directly.

    Pretty much this. I accept the few compliments that I get with a gracious thank you. I polietely decline attempts to lure my into gluttony. I stay out of discussions about Atkins, Phetramine, Dukan, etc. I don't tell people about my calorie goal, my exercise routine, or my knowledge about weight loss. Most people don't want to hear it anyway, and they'll just assume I don't know what I'm talking about if I do tell them. It keeps the peace when I keep my mouth shut.

    If someone has a direct question, I'm more than happy to answer it. But people who ask direct questions are more likely prepared to hear the answer.
  • tipadoo
    tipadoo Posts: 104 Member
    People who realize I'm losing weight enjoy telling me that I'm doing it wrong. I tell them that this tasty bowl of pasta is the one thing keeping a knife out of their chest.

    zyxst - you crack me up everytime you post something!!! hahahahaha
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member

    but I've got a heart rate checker that I will use to work out EXACTLY how many calories I burn during a rest day and see if I have to re-judge a sensible calorie intake!). Plus I'm eating back whatever exercise calories MFP grants me, too -

    HRM's are not meant to be worn all day and will give hugely exaggerated numbers if you do that. MFP's exercise numbers are on the high side for most things I do so if you eat those back you're probably getting more than enough nutrition.
  • Denise1224
    Denise1224 Posts: 150 Member
    I have a very dear friend who is using a metabolic clinic to lose weight. She's lost 20 lbs so far I however am still in a plataeu from before joining MFP but she likes to tell me my going to the gym working with a trainer and counting my calories isn't working since I've not lost anything in 4 mos and she has lost 20 lbs I should try it her way ... I refrain from telling her that the way she's doing it is not exactly the healthy way in my opinion she doesn't exercise at all and is only eating what the clinic says she can using their shakes and vitamin supplements... (scratching my head) I too keep my yap shut unless I'm directly asked.
  • raystark
    raystark Posts: 403 Member
    Generally I only talk about if I'm asked.

    Most of my extended family is obese and even when the topic of weight loss comes up, I do not offer feedback unless I am asked a question directly.

    You are a wise fellow.
  • runnermama81
    runnermama81 Posts: 388 Member
    Everyone is different. BUT....it is hard to keep my mouth shut when I hear people say things about weight loss that I know are wrong,or at least wouldn't work for me.
    And speaking of that kind of thing...does anyone else notice that some people always think that anytime we talk about health they assume we mean weight loss. Or if something is low in calories it is automatically thought to be "healthy". This burns me...but I have stopped trying to explain it because it is usually in vain.
  • foxombie
    foxombie Posts: 16
    Please don't assume that I would presume to lecture anyone - I don't! I just find it frustrating when someone says something that is... well... either not my opinion or just plain wrong (which also could be opinion I guess, but I think we can all agree on some basic health stuff!).

    I have been advised all sorts of crap from people. Don't lift heavy weights, said someone. Er, hello? I'm training as a powerlifter - it's kind of in the job description. Apparently it will make me bulky, but my aunt who was a champion is slighter and lighter than me and she is fantastic at heavy lifts, so at least I have evidence for my personal satisfaction that I don't have to avoid heavier stuff. Plus a lot of the lovely ladies on here have the kind of body I'm aiming for through weight training, which is just awesome. :D

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