I have had it!!!

I apologize in advance for the length, bad spelling, etc because I am literally melting down with anger in a way that I have not allowed myself before because I am sick of all the negative comments I get from my family about my weight. I have wanted to vent before but talk myself out of it, don't want to appear whiney, you know "just get over it" or "you'll be calmer in an hour" type things I tell myself but I have hit the road in what I can take any longer and am sitting on the fence of labeling myself as stuck being fat forever or being sooooooo freaking mad I'm going to start extremely exercising and dieting to get in model shape but then when I think that somehow giving my family credit in my mind for making me angry enough to lose the weight makes me feel like I'm rewarding their horrible behaviour.

I deal with many comments but this was my morning:

Me: My daughter is growing like a bean pole right now.
Grandma: She's very tiny and takes after her sisters. Actually you were really tiny when you were little, so was your aunt, but now look at you.

I told her that wasn't very polite and she just ignored me and carried on.

My aunt tried to give me weight loss shakes and advice. I was thin before. I know what to do, I just lost control. All she talks about it losing weight. It drives me insane. When did I join the fat club? It's like I got a membership to a club where you no longer have to filter your comments or attempt to be polite.

I should mention that they have been in the obese catagory for as long as I can remember. I was thin and in great shape up until the last 6 years where the weight has climbed up each year. I have never ever ever even addressed their weight to them, especially not in the derogatory way in which they speak to me. How is it that your own family can't be so disgustingly rude, demoralizing and insensitive. If I didn't have a young daughter I literally would like to just not be around them that's how sick I am of their rudeness.My Grandmother used to be alright but my aunt moved back who is a very abrasive personality and she's become more like her that last number of years. And they are fatter than me? I just don't get it???? What is wrong with people!!! I know their weight has been a struggle and something they hate. As someone who's been there you'd think they could be sympathetic to my struggle right now but instead I'm in the fat club - open for all insults.

That's what I deal with on one side of the family. On my side of the family, my mother who is also overweight initially started off telling me I was getting fatter (ok maybe just trying to point it out to help me - not polite but I didn't think her intention was to be rude) to then telling me how our family has bad genes and we are all destined to be overweight (most of the family is obese) and that there is nothing I can do about it and we get into it sometimes because I have to tell her my weight is from too many calories. I will just not accept being told to accept it. And she loves to point out when some of my other relatives have gotten fatter? I guess because she feels better not being as big as them?

Please get me out of the fat club!!!!!!!! I seriously need to lose this weight so I especially don't have to listen to my Grandmother and aunt any longer. I know you are not supposed to look for quick fixes or unhealthy ways of losing weight but I want anything that will make this go away faster, but I don't know how to get it out of my head that is was their rudeness that has driven me to this, like I don't want to give rude a#$%^ss credit for my weight loss but I can't stand to listen to one more comment about how tiny my daughter is and how big I am for the rest of my f-ing life!!! and they don't listen when I tell them it's rude or not a conversation I want to have.

I don't like my family (I exclude my mother in that comment) but I really don't like most of my family and I hate feeling this way but everything is like some kind of sick competition. I am just dumbfounded by the way I am being treated since putting on weight.