Why do you care if people have open food diaries ?

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  • PhoenixRising7
    PhoenixRising7 Posts: 194 Member
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    I keep my diary closed. I had an ED in the past, and if I kept my diary open to scrutiny, I fear I would relapse. I know that may sound weird to some people, but having my diary closed works for me. I log everything I eat and drink. I don't ask for (nor do I need) any advice on what to eat or not to eat, so having an open diary is not a necessity for me. My husband is on this journey with me, and he knows everything I eat (and vice versa), so we hold each other accountable. I do not keep it closed because I have something to hide either, and I really hate it when people imply that those who have closed diaries are hiding something or they are not as serious about losing weight. I can assure you, I am pretty darn serious about shedding these excess pounds in a healthy manner.

    If you prefer to have your diary open, more power to you. I just prefer something different. I won't judge you, so please don't judge me.
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
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    Everyone I meet on MFP is for the sole purpose of weight loss. I do not make friends on here to discuss video games or politics. This is a site dedicated to weight loss and I am dedicated to weight loss. Those I friend here should be dedicated to weight loss as well.

    I want open diaries so I can get meal ideas and to actually be able to offer good dietary advice to those that ask for it.

    Additionally, I do not like the idea of saying "Fantastic day! Keep it up!" to someone that is "under their calorie goal" but only east one twinky a day and that is it while jogging for 10 hours.

    I am not one to say "Omg you had a slice of white bread YOU MONSTER" or complain in a similar fashion. I follow macros and overall health choices. So long as they enjoy what they eat, are meeting their goals and desires, and do not feel like they are starving as well as meeting their nutritional needs, then I have no problem with what they eat.
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
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    I don't.
  • kenazfehu
    kenazfehu Posts: 1,188 Member
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    I only care if somebody posts a thread for help, some version of "what am I doing wrong?"
  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
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    Does it make you feel better to see other people having slip ups, do you get meal ideas, does it make you feel better when you have a bad day to justify it against someone else's also not so perfect day ?

    Yes - that is exactly the reason.
  • isitsororo
    isitsororo Posts: 116
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    I just started here and have my diary set to public (I think), because I'm fine with anyone taking a look. It's not really a "diary," it's nothing emotional or secret. It shouldn't be for anyone IMO. People are welcome to judge or provide feedback all they want, and I am free to take or not take their advice. Honestly, if someone wants to get mad at me for what I'm eating, hey, free entertainment!


    I've looked at a couple of diaries. Just curiosity really. I'm not going to hold it against someone of their diary is set to private.
  • Zero2hero2013
    Zero2hero2013 Posts: 458
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    i havent read all three pages to be honest, so if i am repeating sorry! i personally choose to have my food diary open i log everything i eat good days and the bad, i am never ashamed of what i eat sometimes regretful but always see the funny positive side, theres always room for a refeed hehe. anyways i have quite a few friends on here and i am not the most supportive member by afar but i record everythign i can and keep it open so anyone can see, i have lost over 30kg of fat in total i say fat as im not 30kg lighter in weight. i check out other body builders diets to motivate, knowing 5 of your friends are all eating with similar goals and similar approaches loggin the workouts and food daily keeps you going when your mojo drops lol. also getting honest advice from people i believe know what they are talking about (not everyone lol) has helped me a few times in adjusting my diet to better suit my goals,

    i personally accept anyone who sends me an invite, although i do remove members who i feel are affecting my aura, and the end result is a lot of positive support.
  • sarahisme18
    sarahisme18 Posts: 574 Member
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    I don't make it a stipulation of being friends that they have an open diary, but I also do not comment "way to go!" on someone's "was under calorie goal" updates when I can't see an open diary. I have no idea if they're actually doing a good job if I can't see what it is. So really, it's their loss.... because they're not going to get support that way.

    I personally like to open my diary so I can get good feedback, share meal ideas, and stay accountable. It's also really helped me not to be ashamed of eating to know others are seeing it, AND to get encouragement about it.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    The only "picking apart diaries" I've ever seen... is when people post, "I'm not losing weight/what am I doing wrong"... and then people point it out. It usually ends in a very defensive OP and a flame war.

    Is that where this mindset of "people picking apart diaries" is coming from? If someone is literally PMing you out of the blue to tell you that you suck for drinking milk or eating that one piece of pizza, report the **** out of that person or block them. In the forums though, if it's relevant to the topic, people need to learn they may not get answers they want to hear when they ask, "Hey, look at my diary--is it okay to eat 1000 calories of Taco Bell over my daily calorie goals if I'm not losing weight?"
  • Cranktastic
    Cranktastic Posts: 1,517 Member
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    WHY DO YOU CARE IF THEY CARE?
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    Because *what* we eat matters for our health and well-being.

    But I really don't care if your food diary is open or not...it's just that if it isn't, you might be hiding the problem and preventing someone from providing a solution.
  • mhairi81
    mhairi81 Posts: 40 Member
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    I def don't have mine open, but only because I really struggle with making it 'look good' and was often tempted not to log something. Now it's closed, I'm completely honest with myself and if I have a bad day it's all there and I can really assess the damage.
  • Iready
    Iready Posts: 22 Member
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    Mine is open. I want ideas on how to better my eating habits.
    I like others with open diaries so I can get ideas on bettering my eating habits.

    I never even thought to judge someone for eating over or getting all smug because I ate better than you.
    I thought MFP was a place that others like me supported each other in the day to day balance of food.

    I have very supportive friends on here, they have seen me eat good and bad, and they support me. However, knowing that a few will say something about drinking more water at the end of the day, holds me accountable to drink just one more..okay, just one more...grrr OKAY! just one more. It helps me to have an open diary.

    If your not looking for that kind of support, then do what works for you. We all have to find our way to make this work. Open or Closed, it doesn't matter both are very personal options.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
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    I keep mine open because I practice what I preach, and I don't really care if anyone doesn't like my diary. I don't really have any food nazis jumping down my throat about it either. The only negativity I get is from people who are afraid of fat, and for those people I hope my results can help quell their fears about dietary fat consumption.
  • perfectingpatti
    perfectingpatti Posts: 1,037 Member
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    I personally am here for myself
    Then why do you care what other people care about?
  • checkmatekingtwo
    checkmatekingtwo Posts: 118 Member
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    I started with mine open, but then had a bad experience with a "friend" on MFP being very judgmental about a macro-nutrient I wasn't even tracking. When I did look at what she was getting on her high horse about, I saw it was within my doctor's guidelines. When I told her my levels were doctor-approved, she disagreed and said "I won't mention it again" and next day when the macro-nutrient wasn't within her approved level, she de-friended me without even a word.

    That was my first MFP friend.

    Almost my last.

    The odd thing was, that I was eating one item that was (on the chart) consistently putting me over on that nutrient --- if she'd been a real friend, she might have noticed that the MFP listing for that nutrient was incorrect (it was for a double-serving not a single-serving), rather than just give me a private tirade about how I am destroying my health. Since I wasn't tracking that nutrient, I didn't see the MFP error (which I have since corrected).

    At that point I decided to close my diary. I'm doing this for me. I know what a healthy diet is. I regularly provide my diary to my doctor, who is onboard with me. I don't intend to provide fodder for the diet-police on this site. I am happy to provide support for others.

    Most people here are wonderful and supportive. I just don't want the negative Nancy's to get me down. And, frankly, I really don't want a friend who won't be a friend unless they can read my diary. If, in the future, I need advice, I'll ask for it and gladly open my diary (temporarily). Until then, it's just for me and my doctor.
  • Subowski
    Subowski Posts: 71
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    My diary is closed for one reason only.....fear of being judged. I will have a go at opening it to friends, to try and be a bit more "involved", but I'm quite a private person and a lot of my eating is "emotional".....I just feel like I'm making myself a bit of an open book for people to comment on.

    Here goes, I'll try. But if I get anything other than sane, sensible, well intentioned and courteously-worded comments, I am so telling my mum of you.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
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    I keep mine open because I don't really care what other people think. And sometimes I like to "show-off" when people claim that you can't lose weight if you eat _____ . There are no off-limits foods in my diet except for foods that I simply don't like to eat.
  • junipearl
    junipearl Posts: 326 Member
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    I like to see what my friends are eating as it can give me inspiration or ideas!

    I also like keeping mine open to friends because it keeps me somewhat accountable to eat clean. I know a Mcdonalds cheeseburger would fit into the calories I have left for the day - but going home and snacking on some hummus and veggies will look more impressive in my diary lol ;)
  • KristenE83
    KristenE83 Posts: 187 Member
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    Mine is open. Go ahead and check it out if you want.... you might be frightened because I log everything. I like to see what other people are eating for meal ideas and to see where they are spending (and not spending) their calories because maybe it will help me. I keep mine open for the same reason, maybe it would help someone else. I have friends who are specifically my friends so I can see what they are chowing down on. I have friends who have their logs open and are clearly lying, but I don't judge because food is so much deeper than calories for some people. I have friends who have closed logs, and thats ok too. From what I can see, everyone on here gets and gives motivation, and I appreciate everyone regardless of the status of their food log.

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