New member getting back on track, needs YOUR help! :)

Hi all.

My name is Alex and I'm 18. I have previously lost and currently maintained eight kilograms/seventeen pounds, and I am desperately trying to lose another eight kilograms before my vacation early next year. I dream about being on this vacation accompanied by my well deserved, dream body nearly every single night - I want this extremely badly.

I have been eating horribly for about four weeks now, and have put two kilograms back on. I am finding it extremely difficult to get back on track, but I think that things will get easier for me after a good, solid week back on track (proven by previous experience). I am not even lasting a day because even though I'm so extremely motivated (internally AND externally), I have no will power and I can't say no to the food in front of me!

All I need is a solid week and from there I will have something to build myself up from. I really need your help - how do I get back on track? What lets me down and creates a binge, on every new day I try to conquer, the "Oh you're hopeless, you can't even last a day, you have so many more days ahead of you, this is going to take too long, all this ugly fat on your body is stopping you, so just give up!'. I thank myself that I am someone who doesn't give up on their dreams, but I would really really like to get back on track and conquer my last eight kilos/17 lbs.

Oh - and please note that I am not binging/failing because I am not eating enough. Every time I binge I have a satisfied, full stomach, is just a matter of the negative thinking that's really stopping me.

Also; I would LOVE some new friends on here! I have heard that this is the most awesome, supportive and informative weight loss and fitness community out there, and I'd love to be a part of it. Please send me a friend request!

Thanks all.