Are you shedding your mental fat or just your body fat?

Have you or are you actively and purposely/regularly changing yourself inside (your mind-set, the way you think about yourself and/or the underlying reasons as to why you are overweight or obese in the first place), as you are changing yourself/changing your body outside by losing the weight?

If so, how or what are you doing to better prepare for this major change in your life, for the "new" you--or are you?

Can you share some of your success stories in how and/or what you're doing to shed the mental fat as you change(d) your body and shed your body fat?

May be you don't think you need or want to change yourself ("inside/mentally"), your mind-set or way of thinking about yourself--that's totally understandable. I didn't think about this myself really, until I was reading some of the replies to this thread:
Do you still feel "fat" mentally after a lot of weight loss?
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/397372-do-you-still-feel-fat-mentally-after-a-lot-of-weight-loss

--that caused me to start thinking that many of us here (not ALL, but at least some of us) *may* have underlying issues that if left unchecked will possibly cause our new lifestyle and new body change(s) to not be as dynamic and healthy as it could be--this thread REALLY inspired me to meditate and take action NOW on this:

Reading some of that thread just made my heart hurt for many of those people posting:cry: , I could almost feel their, ummmm, confusion and woe --so MANY posters saying they still see themselves as fat, even though they've lost the weight or are well on their way to reaching their weight loss goals.:cry: I personally don't think that will happen to me, BUT as my father always taught me, "never say never" and thus I'm going to begin a new "regiment" with my new lifestyle of eating, drinking and thinking/living...I'm going to start to work on losing my "mental" fat & flab DAILY starting now. NO MORE mere working on my body fat (by eating and drinking better & daily exercising), but begin to "work-out" my mind fat DAILY too! :glasses:

I am going to begin a new NSV daily logging on my food or exercise journal/new goal starting today...I am going to start keeping track (writing down DAILY and thinking about more often) my NSVs that I'm experiencing daily--little things like my children & hubby telling me I'm looking smaller, like my being able to run on the treadmill for 1 minute and 45 seconds last night (NOT much to some, but HUGE to me--because it's HARD for me to run:blushing: ). Little things like that. I'm also going to start REJECTING and countering with some truth-filled positives to/for those small NAGGING little thoughts of..."uhhhh...you're fat, sure, your gut maybe shrinking, but it's still HUGE", and negative/self-defeating things like that. Start answering them with positive affirmations, like, Yep...it's going to take a long time, but I'm worth it and stuff like that! Sure, it's "corny" positive mental attitude stuff that many scoff at...but I'm going to start positive self talk now--not merely for ego stroking per say, but instead to build up my mental state to better prepare myself for my new body and mind-set about said new body:wink: using daily positive "affirmations" and visualizations of seeing myself slim, healthy and STRONG mentally and physically like a work-out of sorts, while I'm in the midst of this battle! So that when I reach my goal--I'll see it, feel it and embrace it in a mentally healthy way.

Replies

  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
    Here's some of the things I've discovered about this really important matter. One thing I read from an article about this foul business called "phantom fat" that really caused me to start this thread is this excerpt :



    Fat Loss doesn’t make everything right

    While losing a lot of body fat has a myriad of physical and psychological benefits, it is important to realize that when people lose weight they may not lose the reasons that caused them to be overweight in the first place.

    The “hedonic treadmill” plays a prominent role here. So, as a person achieves a goal or gets something new, expectations and desires rise in tandem, which results in no permanent gain in happiness.

    Whether you are on your way towards a fat loss goal or thinking about endeavoring to do so, here is some food for thought:

    Losing fat won’t change who you are as a person

    Fat loss is every bit as much about eliminating self-defeatist thinking and emotional roadblocks, as it is about the scale weight.

    Be realistic and clear about your reasons and expectations of losing fat. Try and wire your brain to achieve these goals for yourself – your physical and mental health. If you find yourself in a mentality that you need to lose weight and need to look better, try and draw upon some more intrinsic goals, such as adapting an enjoyment for healthy eating and physical activity. This kind of mindset will not only help you with your fat loss goal long-term, it will also prepare you for the emotional complacency and “phantom fat” that often ensues.

    Here's the rest of the article... Phatom Fat Loss May Linger

    http://www.diet-blog.com/09/phantom_fat_may_linger_after_weight_loss.php


    Here's some other articles on this topic:

    When the mirror lies
    http://caloriecount.about.com/mirror-lies-b556868


    ‘Phantom fat’ can linger after weight loss
    Losing pounds doesn't automatically shed larger-than-life self-image

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31489881/ns/health-womens_health/t/phantom-fat-can-linger-after-weight-loss/

    8 ways to think thin

    http://www.webmd.com/diet/features/8-ways-to-think-thin

    shedding your mental fat--Make the Mental Fat-Body Fat Connection

    http://blogs.webmd.com/pamela-peeke-md/2011/02/make-the-mental-fat-body-fat-connection.html
  • SheilaG1963
    SheilaG1963 Posts: 298 Member
    bumping to follow post, but I'm still mentally over 350 pounds.:sad:
  • Mitzimum
    Mitzimum Posts: 163 Member
    bump
  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
    bumping to follow post, but I'm still mentally over 350 pounds.:sad:

    Sheila, honey I am so utterly proud of you! To lose 104 pounds is SHERO stuff! You rock.:heart::flowerforyou: :heart: If you get a chance, check out those links, there is some pretty cool info there pertaining to this matter.
  • workinprogress37
    workinprogress37 Posts: 24 Member
    These are great articles. Thanks for sharing them.
  • QTRARO
    QTRARO Posts: 75 Member
    I found when I weight loss, I still felt the same mentally.. I knew I'd lost weight because I was wearing a smaller size etc. Even compliments and questions about how I lost weight.. I'd still picture myself as being bigger.

    I think the only thing that made me realise was the shock of seeing myself in photos and realising I am actually smaller so I put pictures of myself in my bedroom and around the house. It might sound a little strange but it was good to just have a visual to remind myself.. otherwise it is easy to forget and slip back into old habits.

    I'm still on my way though, not at goal or anything and I do feel bad for those who carry about their mental woes and body issues even after they have lost weight.
  • sam_gamgee
    sam_gamgee Posts: 138 Member
    I'm certainly finding it difficult to get my head around. I wasn't *that* big (114kg or 251lb when I started, I'm about 1.77m or 5ft 10in) but have always been a bit on the chubby side. Now I'm only a couple of kilos from having a "healthy" BMI for the first time in my life, and I really hadn't realised how much of a shadow my weight had cast over me, even though I was in denial about it.

    Sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad. I still have to do a bit of a double take every time I try on clothes - first impression when I get something in my new size is always "nah too small", but then it fits, which is a great feeling. I'm also enjoying how the clothes fit and seeing how they look on me, but that's been tempered a bit by the realisation that "before", when I liked how my clothes looked, it was relative not absolute. As in "this shirt looks good - for me" not just "this shirt looks good". Things like that make me realise just how much my self esteem was affected, though if you'd asked me I'd have said my self esteem was fine.

    Now, the challenge is to avoid turning into a narcissistic tosser who people roll their eyes at. :P I think it's a challenge I'm up for ... :-)
  • sam_gamgee
    sam_gamgee Posts: 138 Member
    Sorry, I should say I *had* always been on the chubby side. Hmmm, might have to think about this a bit more. :-)
  • KayeArlana
    KayeArlana Posts: 42 Member
    bump
  • TKRV
    TKRV Posts: 165 Member
    Throughout my youth, I've had low self esteem. It's hilarious now, look at photos of me when I was 16 with t-shirts that are way too big for me. The thing was, I thought I was that big even though I clearly wasn't. (For the record, I hovered around 125-130 in high school) This poor emotional relationship with my body led to a college summer of under eating at which point I got down to a very low weight. That was my wake up call. I resized that I would disappear if I was only happy when I lost weight. I was tired, grumpy and didn't want to do much of anything. Before it got any worse, I started habitually looking at myself in the mirror naked. I would point out the parts of my body that I liked. Eventually, I started to rely on that judgement more than the judgement of the scale. Sometimes, I would step on the scale and see that I had gained one or two pounds and not care. That could be a growing mussel or plenty of other things. What did that number matter so long as I knew that I looked good.

    This all happened before MFP. As I grow older, I want to make sure I maintain a healthy lifestyle (I have this dream of living to at least 100 years of age. that won't happen on an unhealthy diet) Equally important is that I like what I see in the mirror.

    I would recommend everyone, no matter what their current weight is, should look at themselves in the mirror naked often and focus only on the parts they like. Every person, no matter what their size, is beautiful in some way. I think this practice helps put the focus on the body's shape and health. It reminds a person that the number on the scale is not the only measure that is important. Just like a person who weights in every week to check their weight loss progress, a person should weigh their feelings toward their body.
  • SheilaG1963
    SheilaG1963 Posts: 298 Member
    bumping to follow post, but I'm still mentally over 350 pounds.:sad:

    Sheila, honey I am so utterly proud of you! To lose 104 pounds is SHERO stuff! You rock.:heart::flowerforyou: :heart: If you get a chance, check out those links, there is some pretty cool info there pertaining to this matter.

    Thank you. I will check out the posts!
  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
    Throughout my youth, I've had low self esteem. It's hilarious now, look at photos of me when I was 16 with t-shirts that are way too big for me. The thing was, I thought I was that big even though I clearly wasn't. (For the record, I hovered around 125-130 in high school) This poor emotional relationship with my body led to a college summer of under eating at which point I got down to a very low weight. That was my wake up call. I resized that I would disappear if I was only happy when I lost weight. I was tired, grumpy and didn't want to do much of anything. Before it got any worse, I started habitually looking at myself in the mirror naked. I would point out the parts of my body that I liked. Eventually, I started to rely on that judgement more than the judgement of the scale. Sometimes, I would step on the scale and see that I had gained one or two pounds and not care. That could be a growing mussel or plenty of other things. What did that number matter so long as I knew that I looked good.

    This all happened before MFP. As I grow older, I want to make sure I maintain a healthy lifestyle (I have this dream of living to at least 100 years of age. that won't happen on an unhealthy diet) Equally important is that I like what I see in the mirror.

    I would recommend everyone, no matter what their current weight is, should look at themselves in the mirror naked often and focus only on the parts they like. Every person, no matter what their size, is beautiful in some way. I think this practice helps put the focus on the body's shape and health. It reminds a person that the number on the scale is not the only measure that is important. Just like a person who weights in every week to check their weight loss progress, a person should weigh their feelings toward their body.

    LOVE this suggestion...I'll definitely incorporate this info my daily mental flab and fat exercises. Thank you so much for posting!!!
  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
    I'm certainly finding it difficult to get my head around. I wasn't *that* big (114kg or 251lb when I started, I'm about 1.77m or 5ft 10in) but have always been a bit on the chubby side. Now I'm only a couple of kilos from having a "healthy" BMI for the first time in my life, and I really hadn't realised how much of a shadow my weight had cast over me, even though I was in denial about it.

    Sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad. I still have to do a bit of a double take every time I try on clothes - first impression when I get something in my new size is always "nah too small", but then it fits, which is a great feeling. I'm also enjoying how the clothes fit and seeing how they look on me, but that's been tempered a bit by the realisation that "before", when I liked how my clothes looked, it was relative not absolute. As in "this shirt looks good - for me" not just "this shirt looks good". Things like that make me realise just how much my self esteem was affected, though if you'd asked me I'd have said my self esteem was fine.

    Now, the challenge is to avoid turning into a narcissistic tosser who people roll their eyes at. :P I think it's a challenge I'm up for ... :-)

    Now, the challenge is to avoid turning into a narcissistic tosser who people roll their eyes at. :P I think it's a challenge I'm up for ... :-)" :glasses:
    Thanks so much for posting! This what you've said is important and deep to me...and something to EVER be mindful of (for me anyhoo--not merely for "other people's sake--even though that's VERY important too--but also for balance & humility's sake more importantly. Humility before, during and once achieving my goal is a major key and major contributing factor to good/REALISTIC and cool self esteem and in helping rid ourselves of mental fat--well, it will be for me, I truly believe that. )..."
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