Will power - will I or won't I?

jennyelizabuff
jennyelizabuff Posts: 6
in Introduce Yourself
It's true. I am a weakling.

I feel a little embarrassed admitting that but that really is my biggest issue. Well, other than my butt...

I start diets and exercise regimes on average about 8 times a year, and I have never ever stuck to a single one.

When it comes to diets, I don't believe in restricting yourself when it comes to food. Ok, so that sounds a little contradictory, but I genuinely think that a little bit of what you fancy does you good. That and if you restrict all the fun stuff like cake and carbs, you go a little bit potty and end up lying in bed surrounded by Mr Kipling wrappers and half a baguette. Restricting just isn't worth it when life is short. So if I want a slice of toast, I have one, just not the whole loaf. If I want a piece of cheesecake, I have one and that's it (well... most of the time)

My greatest enemy, however, is exercise. The arch nemesis of the lazy individual as well as all that extra fat we store. I have never had a love affair with exercise, and I doubt I ever will. Don't get me wrong - I love to walk but it's almost December here, and I don't live or work in the most savoury of neighbourhoods, so most days that is out of the question. I love to swim but it's so expensive. I don't like exercising with other people, which rules out classes, the gym and the moral support of other Sweaty Betty's. If someone tells me and makes me and forces me and reminds me, then I will do it, but because I am a solo slimmer, I give up far to easily, then in despair turn to Mr Kipling (again), thus making any efforts I have actually made, well, a little pointless.

But I guess my biggest question is, am I alone in this? Am I the only person feeling almost devoid of willpower but with a great desire to be a healthy weight for the first time since childhood?

If there is anybody out there who is willing to join me on my strange little quest for gaining willpower whilst decreasing the size and state of my butt (it's actually state-sized now), then please do get in touch

:flowerforyou:

Replies

  • Skratchie
    Skratchie Posts: 131 Member
    My butt just applied for its own ZIP code. Sending FR now. :-)
  • Rayman79
    Rayman79 Posts: 2,009 Member
    A lot of us start at that point. We don't want to go out in public to exercise because you are too unfit and/or fear others' judgement.

    The good news is you can lose weight with diet alone, it just takes a little longer (usually) and you will lose some muscle tissue along with the fat if you aren't exercising which compromises how you will look when thinner.

    That being said, if you tighten up your diet a bit and lose some weight, you will probably feel like getting out there more and may then feel up to exercising more. By the way, I am completely with you on your diet philosophy. Don't deny yourself everything, just keep to your daily calorie targets and make sure a decent amount of your diet is made up of food with some nutritional value (for health reasons more than weightloss).

    If you think you might be able to motivate yourself enough to do a workout from home there are a number of DVD's you could try, as well as some great body weight exercise routines you can do at home and with little to no equipment.

    Just remember that even a small step taken is better than no step at all!
  • jennyelizabuff
    jennyelizabuff Posts: 6
    I do love running but it does not agree with my body and I am almost guaranteed a chest infection if I run more than once a week. I do have a few good workout DVDs too, but then it's finding the time/space (read 'motivation') to do them.

    I really am my own worst enemy, but I have at last bitten the lard bullet and rejoined MFP, and having posted my first post on a forum EVER, I'm hoping this is a better way for me to get my act together and get my butt back to person-sized, not balloon-sized.

    :bigsmile:
  • Rayman79
    Rayman79 Posts: 2,009 Member
    I found that having a good support network on here helps - and keeps you accountable.

    If you suffer from acute laziness, I suggest making it difficult to cheat. If one slip is going to lead to a binge, get rid of those 'trigger' foods from the house all together.

    For a lot of people, having a couple of days where you are really strict on yourself can help eliminate a lot of the junk cravings and make it easier in the long run. You don't have to stop eating these foods forever, but it might be worth considering to give you a bit of a kick start.
  • Katherinesfitness
    Katherinesfitness Posts: 90
    I feel the same. I've never been a thin, fit girl and I don't really like exercise. I'm more of a computer and video games girl so my life is pretty inactive. Every time I began a diet or took up walking I would be motivated for a couple of weeks but then I'd give into cravings, feel bad about it and eat more. I also get KILLER cravings which I mentally feel like someone is shoving me in a cage, I've been known to cry over not being able to eat a marsbar before hahaha and guess what? After my partner spent an hour telling me no and me telling myself I'll just regret it I ate it anyway. I do like classes but I am mostly a solo girl because I don't want anyone to see how I'm doing until I'm sure I can make it (As if we need to worry about that judgement when we're trying our best right now.). So no you're not alone, but more importantly!!

    You aren't a failure if you don't have iron will!! I've been participating in the forums for just a day and one thing I've learnt is that everyone I have seen on here gives into cravings every now and then and many have given up and started again. For some people like us it's just not in our blood to get pumped about the fact we're going to be exercising and not being able to eat whatever we want for however long.

    Don't get down on yourself just because you've stalled a few times, for me it took many stalls (and two weeks ago I had a massive stall after weeks of being good, plus just last night I ate 3 brownies that cost me a bunch of points...) before I got into the mind set to not get down on myself for having slip ups. Every time you start again is a win for your self esteem, it doesn't matter if you've put weight back on. What matters is that you're still trying!

    Rayman has some excellent advice, and he's right, the support network on here is great. When you're feeling like binging or getting down on yourself get into the motivation or progress forums. The beauty I find of this forum is that it's pretty anonymous, you're talking to people who are going through the same thing but you can choose how much you interact because you don't see the members.

    Feel free to add me as a friend for a bit of support if you like :) The most important thing I think and I've seen thrown around a lot here and on other fitness forums is that you need to do what's comfortable for you.
  • Steph_135
    Steph_135 Posts: 3,280 Member
    ME: Before I go on, let me mention that it has taken me over 10 years to lose 70 lbs...

    YOU: It's true. I am a weakling.

    ME: That is a belief that you have about yourself. Nothing more. It cannot be a fact unless you believe it.

    YOU: I feel a little embarrassed admitting that but that really is my biggest issue. Well, other than my butt...

    ME: What is the root of your "issue"? I do not think it is that you are a weakling.

    YOU: I start diets and exercise regimes on average about 8 times a year, and I have never ever stuck to a single one.

    ME: Now you have started giving yourself reasons to accept the belief that you are a weakling. I also go on and off of diets (all the time), but I have never considered myself anything but motivated to continue.

    YOU: When it comes to diets, I don't believe in restricting yourself when it comes to food. Ok, so that sounds a little contradictory, but I genuinely think that a little bit of what you fancy does you good. That and if you restrict all the fun stuff like cake and carbs, you go a little bit potty and end up lying in bed surrounded by Mr Kipling wrappers and half a baguette. Restricting just isn't worth it when life is short. So if I want a slice of toast, I have one, just not the whole loaf. If I want a piece of cheesecake, I have one and that's it (well... most of the time)

    ME: I agree, restrictions are lame, which is prob why you are on and off diets. I had a sore stomach for a while and only ate carbs and veggies, and lost weight more so than when I was restricting carbs. You are on the right track here for sure!

    YOU: My greatest enemy, however, is exercise. The arch nemesis of the lazy individual as well as all that extra fat we store. I have never had a love affair with exercise, and I doubt I ever will. Don't get me wrong - I love to walk but it's almost December here, and I don't live or work in the most savoury of neighbourhoods, so most days that is out of the question. I love to swim but it's so expensive. I don't like exercising with other people, which rules out classes, the gym and the moral support of other Sweaty Betty's. If someone tells me and makes me and forces me and reminds me, then I will do it, but because I am a solo slimmer, I give up far to easily, then in despair turn to Mr Kipling (again), thus making any efforts I have actually made, well, a little pointless.

    ME: Start slooooow! I am NOT an exerciser!! But 2 years ago I was VERY motivated and went through the 30 Days Shred and many other activities like I had been doing it my whole life! I like working out in winter cause of less heat. Find something you LIKE to do (or can tolerate)! I did belly dance for a while, and still do. Zumba is EXTREMELY fun in a class setting, and doesn't feel like a workout. (AND I *HATE* WORKING OUT IN PUBLIC!!) Your past efforts have NOT been pointless, because they have brought you to this point.

    YOU: But I guess my biggest question is, am I alone in this? Am I the only person feeling almost devoid of willpower but with a great desire to be a healthy weight for the first time since childhood?

    ME: Willpower is something we have to make for ourselves. It comes from within, although I think you can also find some motivation externally. You just seem in a slump. This time will pass, and you will be better because of it. What will it take for you to make the necessary changes in your life toward a healthier one?

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