Self-Loathing Right Now...Why?

Losing over 100 lbs. is incredible! Way to go! We all get down sometimes. One of the things that I've heard to do is to keep a simple notebook journal of the good things that happen during your day... or the good things that you do. That way, the focus is living and enjoying the present moment and learning how to feel your best. Keep up the good work and learn ways to let go of your fears. Best wishes to you : )

Wish I can give you experience of weight loss changes to the body but I don't have that yet. You are an amazing accomplished lady. Yes you may have scars but they are your battle wounds from all you endured. YOu have a story to tell and one you are continuing to write day by day. Keep the faith and keep up the hard work you already do.:flowerforyou:

I often loathe who I am and what I look like. Life can be very hard and some times we get weary of the battle. Some things that help lift my spirits when I get into a funky mood:

1. Count my blessings. we have so MANY things to be thankful for! I always start with indoor plumbing. The idea of hitting the outhouse in the middle of the night gives me the creeps.

2. Think of all the people I love and who love me. It can be pretty amazing when you start to seriously think about it.

3. Consider where you have been and how hard you have worked to get here. Like I said, life is hard, and it takes a lot of courage and strength to push forward every day.

4. Watch a funny movie. There is nothing like laughter to lift your spirits!

5. Reach out to someone in need. Do what you can for someone else. Even if it's just helping someone do a simple task, it will make you feel better.

6. Have a cup of coffee or tea or whatever with a friend. Talk about them, their family, what's going on in your life, etc. Sometimes talking it out to someone and sharing their life helps a lot.

Anyway, just a few things that work for me. I've been battling depression for over 20 years, and these things are what I do when I am down or just don't like me.

Prayers and hugs,

Jo-Ann

I can relate to a lot of what you say. Individual therapy with someone who has experience treating eating disorders and body dysmorphic disorders might really help you. I got tremendous benefit from watching episodes of How to Look Good Naked (especially the BBC version) so if you can find any of those online or on cable TV, check them out! It is possible to retrain yourself to focus on your good aspects and not see your "flaws" so much, but it can take hard work to get to that. Your body is beautiful because it has carried you this far in life through all the struggles and with all the demands that have been placed on it. You wouldn't think less of a war hero because they had scars or lost limbs from fighting honorably for their country, would you? Your body deserves respect for all it has brought you through, just as you deserve respect for your personal accomplishments.

Kimberlee - Listen to your husband and look at those scars as the reason you're alive. I look at the ones my wife carries as a reminder of her struggle to survive and her victory over cancer. I love them because without them I wouldn't have her!

I don't think anyone's immune from that - we live in a society that just loves to focus on imperfections.

Those scars are "victory badges" - the fact that they're there and you're here means you won!!

I've lost 106 pounds, but still have another 100 to go. I'm not happy that the belly remains, BUT, like someone told me yesterday, I look like a totally different person now. I do look BETTER than I did a year ago, and even healthier - so that's what I'm choosing to focus on.

The negative self talk needs to go away and never be heard from again. That can be more destructive than whatever food you were eating before you lost the 100 pounds. Also, be cautious of your input. That means being around negative stinking thinking people, watching shows or movies that aren't conducive to lifting your spirits/mood, etc..

When my oldest daughter was about 4 years old, I remember every night before she went to bed, I would find 3 things to tell her that she did that were awesome that day, or 3 wonderful things about her that I loved. She LOVED it.

I challenge you to do that every day for three weeks - find three things about yourself that are positive things about you or something you did that you're proud of. If you have trouble finding three things, ask your husband for help until you can get into the swing of it. Add to that: "I am awesome."

Good luck!

You are doing great things! I wish I could impart some wisdom for you to see yourself as your husband does and the people replying on this forum. You look great and you can still accomplish much more. We are made from our experiences, good and bad. Keep going and look back at what you have accomplished with pride!

Kimberlee - Listen to your husband and look at those scars as the reason you're alive. I look at the ones my wife carries as a reminder of her struggle to survive and her victory over cancer. I love them because without them I wouldn't have her!

^THIS...is aaaaaaawesome. :drinker:

... for three weeks - find three things about yourself that are positive things about you or something you did that you're proud of. .... Add to that: "I am awesome."

Great advice for everyone. Thank you for posting this!

From my perspective, you are amazing!