The stress and the secret.

abbylady
abbylady Posts: 26 Member
in Motivation and Support
There are two different ways I have handled food.

The first is the stress eating. When life is hectic and moving quickly and I have so much to do I can barely think, I eat. I'm a stress eater with the daily life. Any time I feel an immense amount of pressure lift, I eat. It's my problem.

It's an actual problem. I binge to the point of needing care for it. I have never been fat, but I've certainly never been skinny. I've maintained this average body size for so long that people laugh when I tell them that I binge. And sure, it sounds funny: everyone binges on something every now and again. But not for me. I could binge for days and never feel satisfied.

And then, there's the other extreme. The one I'm struggling with at this very moment.

When I feel in over my head, when money gets tight or relationships feel strained, I don't eat. It's not that I forget to, it's that I actively decide against it. No one needs to tell me how awful it is, no one needs to tell me that this kind of behavior warrants professional help. I'm quite aware. In all honesty, I signed up for MFP to monitor my intake. I knew that money would get tight right about this time. I'd start feeling the drowning sensation in my chest as finals pile up and work demands more hours and things start rushing to their close as Christmas draws near.

Even as I'm sitting here writing this, the thought of leaving this chair and going to work is suffocating. All I want to do is crawl into my bed and wait until spring.

Has anyone else ever felt like this? I know I can talk to those closest to me, but I also don't want the hassle of them telling me what to do. As I've stated, I know exactly what needs to be corrected. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else knows what this feels like...

Replies

  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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  • msshiraz
    msshiraz Posts: 327 Member
    I would reach out to your dr, and share these issues. Its great that you want to reach out for help, but you seem to have some depression issues and associate food as reward or punishment. I would call my dr- not saying that antidepressants is the way to go, but it may be. Therapy about guilt association may be a good idea too- how to deal with the triggers and change your outcome.

    Wish you the best as you work thru this!
  • Neda1178
    Neda1178 Posts: 42
    I gotta say - - I know exactly what you fee like. The only difference in me is that I don't stop eating.. Food is my comfort no matter what the situation. I know it's wrong but I still find myself doing it. Whether I'm stressed, bored, happy or sad - food is there..

    The only thing I know to do is to take it all one day at a time. Each morning I wake up and I think "I don't really want to get out of bed, go to work, all that stuff...". But then I remember the days when I didn't get out of bed and how bad I felt about myself on those days. That makes me get up, take a shower, pack my lunch and eat a good breakfast. Usually the rest falls into place as long as I tell myself to just make it through today.

    So - I'm here for ya if you need any motivation or if you just need to talk!
  • xoalynnxo
    xoalynnxo Posts: 200 Member
    I'm like this all the time! I'm currently in the 'I can't control anything but ill control my food' mindset; Youll see this if you check out my food diary. It's very hard to deal with and get out of. I can't explain much in this post but please message me if you want to talk. I'm the same 'average' body type and people laugh when I talk about binge eating too. I have medical issues that complicate things further but I also know what I need to do to change, I just refuse to. Please feel free to message me if you wana chat more. I feel pretty helpless when I get like this.

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