Help. Does anybody else have this problem?

justkeepswimng
justkeepswimng Posts: 506
in Motivation and Support
I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?
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Replies

  • chelle_fri
    chelle_fri Posts: 333 Member
    I totally get what you're saying. You have to make a promise with yourself that no matter how the day goes, you will log. The first step is just to enforce that behavior. Then over time you'll learn how to balance everything out. It's alright if you had a crap day, it sounds like you've had a pretty good run otherwise. Just a quick thing though, I don't suggest eating under 1200 calories. This could be the reason why you had the freak out.
  • castell5
    castell5 Posts: 234 Member
    I used to do that in my past, but not to the extreme you are speaking of. At my age now (48) I decided I don't want to "play" around anymore. I don't want to be fat, I'm done with that. I took off 43 lbs and nothing is going to make me "quit" and pack it back on. Not a binge, not binges, nothing. I started this quest about 6 months ago and for the first time, haven't done any crazy binging.
    I just woke up one day with my mind set to do this, take it off and keep it off.
    This is the first time I have had any aid and by that I mean My Fitness Pal.
    I think with this site, I can do it, and you can too.
    If you binge.. log it.. then it's there in your face to remind you what you did and then maybe you can just start logging back into good healthy meals that aren't off the wall.
    By the way, I think 1200 calories is too low for anyone and when you go that low, you are hungry.. every day and when you are hungry every day, you are more likely to go "off the wall" try upping your calorie intake to 1500, that might help.
  • AliceRabbit13
    AliceRabbit13 Posts: 138 Member
    Especially when I'm working nights, I will have the urge to binge, I will even start to feel a little crazy and desperate. I have since made sure that if I'm going to binge, the only thing I can binge on is celery sticks or carrots...something where no matter how much i eat it won't mess up my goal. That and I stock up on a lot of protein to prevent meltdowns.

    As far as all or nothing, I get that too. The 'Why bother, I just messed it all up' mentality. For that, I keep logging *no matter what* because I am human and I mess up. The habit of logging will eventually help you narrow down and eliminate excesses.

    As Dory from 'Finding Nemo' says...

    Just keep swimming!
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    The problem is, I know that. It doesn't help for me to know that this is unhealthy behavior. I do think your advice to log everything regardless of whether I go over my limit will help. I tend to log up to 1500 calories and anything beyond that I'm like, "well I know I went over my calorie limit. What's the point of logging it?"
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    When I'm logging my calories, for some reason I find it hard to reach 1200 calories. I feel like I'm eating all day. The problem is, the things I eat are so low calorie that I can eat all day and still be under 1200. I actually try to get to 1400 or so but usually end up just a little under 1200.
  • berry83sweet
    berry83sweet Posts: 44 Member
    I feel like logging makes me think about food more and make excuses to eat more lol. I recently took a break but it hasn't harmed me because I'm making good choices and still losing weight. I plan to start logging again after the weekend.
  • RobynLB
    RobynLB Posts: 617 Member
    I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
    If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
    I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?

    I totally relate to this. I'm either all or nothing with practically everying. I'm either obsessively controlling or completely impulsive... I think it might actually be a personality disorder.

    I have to step back and look at my behavior and tweak it sometimes because it can be hard to recognize. I make myself tone down my obsessive behavior sometimes. I might make myself skip a workout or do a short one. For things I am really compulsive about, I just try to limit my exposure and opportunity to engage in the behavior... which I guess is a kind of controlling obsessive way to handle it... but I guess that's the crux of the problem then, isn't it?
  • Arexxx
    Arexxx Posts: 486 Member
    I was very much like you. But now I'm so much more relaxed about this eating healthy stuff. I eat 1,600 calories a day or so and my job (unloading trucks, cleaning up stock) is enough exersize for me at the moment, plus the walk home.

    Just remember that losing weight doesnt need to be super hard. You can indulge here and there. Just dont eat crap every day and keep a little active

    Oh, and I'm still losing 1-2lbs a week ;)
  • LittleMissMarie87
    LittleMissMarie87 Posts: 47 Member
    Its just self discipline. I'm on a 1200 calorie diet, and I feel great. I guess it just depends on the person. You have to want to lose the weight. I know you can do it! :]
  • DrenRigs
    DrenRigs Posts: 448 Member
    eat anything you like dont deprive yourself its your weekly net calories that count dont go over that . some days eat over your daily intake or under eat whatever you like just keep under your weekly cals that will stop binging
  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
    Yes. I have this problem.

    I tell myself it is twisted thinking (because it is. It's black and white - all or nothing outlook)

    Ditch the diet mentality. You're making lifestyle changes.

    Every time your thoughts go to that, challenge them.

    Having a slip up, then telling myself I should just eat like crap the rest of the day because I already ruined it...is like accidentally dropping my cell phone on the side walk -- therefore telling myself I already dropped it.... might as well smash it to pieces now" lol.
  • DrenRigs
    DrenRigs Posts: 448 Member
    eat aaalll the foods you love
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    QUOTE:

    I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
    If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
    I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?


    I totally relate to this. I'm either all or nothing with practically everying. I'm either obsessively controlling or completely impulsive... I think it might actually be a personality disorder.

    I have to step back and look at my behavior and tweak it sometimes because it can be hard to recognize. I make myself tone down my obsessive behavior sometimes. I might make myself skip a workout or do a short one. For things I am really compulsive about, I just try to limit my exposure and opportunity to engage in the behavior... which I guess is a kind of controlling obsessive way to handle it... but I guess that's the crux of the problem then, isn't it?

    OH YES! I already know I am so OCD. I'm like that in all areas of my life too. I have gotten a lot better in every aspect though.
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    I'm sorry, I'm new to this posting thing. How do I quote someone else with the boxes separating them?
  • emmuci
    emmuci Posts: 160 Member
    hey, the same exact thing happened to me! But lately i've been focusing on trying not too binge when i slightly overeat. i mean it is better to eat 100 calories + than to eat 1000 calories plus. And now i came to have a bit more control over it :smile:
  • autumnwater
    autumnwater Posts: 449 Member
    I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
    If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
    I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?

    I totally hear you! I think it's a sign of perfectionism, actually. If you do something, you overcommit in a way that is unsustainable. Otherwise you are procrastinating because you fear not doing a good job.

    I'm like you too. I haven't gotten my issue under control yet, but I was thinking maybe we could help motivate each other.. I think it'd be helpful to be able to tell others (e.g. you) that you are doing a good job when you are doing a good job. And on other days when I'm screwing up, I need to be confronted and be brought back to reality. Like today, I've been a very bad girl. I ate 1000+ calories over my goal (1400). o.o When I fall of the bandwagon like that, I need a slap on the wrist to remind myself why I am on this site.

    Another thing that has helped me was to try reorganizing my social activities. Instead of having "coffee" or a "drink" with friends, I'm thinking of other ways to hang out with people that don't involve food. So far, I don't have too many ideas, but...haha, working out is a good one, I think. I'd be happy to hear your advice on this!
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    Haha. I want to reply to you guys but I haven't figured out how to do the quote box reply thingies.
  • zacksnana
    zacksnana Posts: 3,230 Member
    Haha. I want to reply to you guys but I haven't figured out how to do the quote box reply thingies.

    Under each post you will see the word QUOTE. Click it. Then that post will be quoted in your post.
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    Haha. I want to reply to you guys but I haven't figured out how to do the quote box reply thingies.

    Under each post you will see the word QUOTE. Click it. Then that post will be quoted in your post.

    AH HAH! Check that out. I guess I just wasn't paying attention. Thanks!
  • justkeepswimng
    justkeepswimng Posts: 506
    I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
    If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
    I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?

    I totally hear you! I think it's a sign of perfectionism, actually. If you do something, you overcommit in a way that is unsustainable. Otherwise you are procrastinating because you fear not doing a good job.

    I know. I am a total perfectionist and when I can't be perfect, I just want to do nothing. It is a really bad and good personality trait. I am great at jobs and anything that involves work in any way. I am just not great at the reflective things.

    I'm like you too. I haven't gotten my issue under control yet, but I was thinking maybe we could help motivate each other.. I think it'd be helpful to be able to tell others (e.g. you) that you are doing a good job when you are doing a good job. And on other days when I'm screwing up, I need to be confronted and be brought back to reality. Like today, I've been a very bad girl. I ate 1000+ calories over my goal (1400). o.o When I fall of the bandwagon like that, I need a slap on the wrist to remind myself why I am on this site.

    Another thing that has helped me was to try reorganizing my social activities. Instead of having "coffee" or a "drink" with friends, I'm thinking of other ways to hang out with people that don't involve food. So far, I don't have too many ideas, but...haha, working out is a good one, I think. I'd be happy to hear your advice on this!

    I am totally aware that I am a total OCD/perfectionist nut job. It is great in some ways and terrible in others.
  • Zangpakto
    Zangpakto Posts: 336 Member
    Log only at end of day... or log what you will have before the day begins then have a rule to follow?

    As for training... why is it bad to train 3 hrs?

    I do regular runs of that time... It is all good :D
  • hedgiie
    hedgiie Posts: 1,226 Member
    in short this is all about discipline.
    you have to do it, that's for the workout and stop it, for eating. also, this has something to do with better choices.

    one strategy that i can recommend is to allow yourself to have lazy days and likewise have those days when you can eat anything you want. good, in my case i do rest for a month after finishing a workout program which takes about 1 to 3 months. for eating i allow myself to give myself a break for at least 1 to 2 times per week.

    however, in time you might notice that you actually might miss workout and you might drop those un-healthy food altogether. after some time, say about 6 months.
  • runboostie
    runboostie Posts: 51 Member
    I used to do that in my past, but not to the extreme you are speaking of. At my age now (48) I decided I don't want to "play" around anymore. I don't want to be fat, I'm done with that. I took off 43 lbs and nothing is going to make me "quit" and pack it back on. Not a binge, not binges, nothing. I started this quest about 6 months ago and for the first time, haven't done any crazy binging.
    I just woke up one day with my mind set to do this, take it off and keep it off.
    This is the first time I have had any aid and by that I mean My Fitness Pal.
    I think with this site, I can do it, and you can too.
    If you binge.. log it.. then it's there in your face to remind you what you did and then maybe you can just start logging back into good healthy meals that aren't off the wall.
    By the way, I think 1200 calories is too low for anyone and when you go that low, you are hungry.. every day and when you are hungry every day, you are more likely to go "off the wall" try upping your calorie intake to 1500, that might help.


    I second that emotion.
  • kelly_e_montana
    kelly_e_montana Posts: 1,999 Member
    I have been diagnosed with bulimia (no longer purge) and Binge Eating Disorder. One of the main characteristics of these types of eating disorders is that there is a cycle of restriction followed by binge again and again. Often, breaking your own dietary "rules" will set off a binge and thus, regular dieting can be counter-productive if you have a history of disordered eating, including actual binges, not just going over. It's important to make plans to deal with binges before they happen and reading books on binge eating may help you. There is a binge eating group on MFP if you would like to join it.

    Do you mean now you're eating 1500 cals or now you're having 4,000 calorie binges? Not sure how to advise because your perception of a binge might actually just be that you are eating where you should be. Maybe you're not having disordered eating at all but are setting goals for yourself that might not be the right fit. For example, you could exercise more and eat more, within reason on both.

    I have lost 41 pounds and eat 1600 calories most days, with a couple over 2000 each week, but I exercise regularly and have a job where I'm on my feet.
  • angelina2585
    angelina2585 Posts: 273 Member
    I used to be a big binger. One of the things that helped me was realising how one of my work friends views food. Nothing is 'good' and nothing is 'bad'. If she's hungry she'll eat. If she's not, she won't. She'll bring a croissant in for breakfast if that's what she fancies and not feel guilty for the rest of the day because she's had something high in calories/fat. I've seen her pack away huge meals in the evening but likewise, if she's not that hungry she won't eat it all. This is a friend who suffered with anorexia in her teens and I am so proud of her for changing her mentality with regards to food and eating.

    Ok so I started to accept that all food is just that - food. However, it's bloody hard to fit in having a piece of cake when you're on 1200 calories and still have normal meals. Trying to do that in the past lead me to missing proper dinners. The best thing I found was to increase my calories 200-300 less than my maintenance level. This allows me to eat the type of foods I want and still lose inches. I'm eating what I believe is a healthier 'diet' and having healthy fats and proteins which I believe fill me up better and I don't crave the sweet stuff.

    Prior to this I was bingeing more or less every day. I can hand on heart say that since February I've had one binge. A proper binge. Just eating everything in sight for about 3 hours. I felt crap and sick but it didn't roll over in to the next day which is what I would have done.


    Edit to say....yes I did log the Mega Binge :D I might as well. There's no point denying it and if I look back through my weight/size loss at least I'll know why it stayed the same.


    Don't know if any of that helps but I do believe that increasing calories helped me. If I feel I'm not allowed to have something then that is all I'll think about and then make myself sick when I do 'allow' it.
  • autumnwater
    autumnwater Posts: 449 Member
    I used to do that in my past, but not to the extreme you are speaking of. At my age now (48) I decided I don't want to "play" around anymore. I don't want to be fat, I'm done with that. I took off 43 lbs and nothing is going to make me "quit" and pack it back on. Not a binge, not binges, nothing. I started this quest about 6 months ago and for the first time, haven't done any crazy binging.
    I just woke up one day with my mind set to do this, take it off and keep it off.
    This is the first time I have had any aid and by that I mean My Fitness Pal.
    I think with this site, I can do it, and you can too.
    If you binge.. log it.. then it's there in your face to remind you what you did and then maybe you can just start logging back into good healthy meals that aren't off the wall.
    By the way, I think 1200 calories is too low for anyone and when you go that low, you are hungry.. every day and when you are hungry every day, you are more likely to go "off the wall" try upping your calorie intake to 1500, that might help.

    Wow.
    One word: respect.
  • RobynLB
    RobynLB Posts: 617 Member
    double post...
  • RobynLB
    RobynLB Posts: 617 Member
    I have been diagnosed with bulimia (no longer purge) and Binge Eating Disorder. One of the main characteristics of these types of eating disorders is that there is a cycle of restriction followed by binge again and again. Often, breaking your own dietary "rules" will set off a binge and thus, regular dieting can be counter-productive if you have a history of disordered eating, including actual binges, not just going over. It's important to make plans to deal with binges before they happen and reading books on binge eating may help you. There is a binge eating group on MFP if you would like to join it.

    Do you mean now you're eating 1500 cals or now you're having 4,000 calorie binges? Not sure how to advise because your perception of a binge might actually just be that you are eating where you should be. Maybe you're not having disordered eating at all but are setting goals for yourself that might not be the right fit. For example, you could exercise more and eat more, within reason on both.

    I hear people talking about binging all the time, and I'm not really sure what qualifies as a binge because I know people who don't have food issues, that might put away huge amounts of food at one time as a regular eating habit (teenage boys, men in general, athletes, etc.). If you are really active, does eating 2-3 times what might be a normal amount of food for you qualify as a binge? What if you just eat large amounts of sweets instead of meals? Is that binging? What if you are eating because you are really just THAT hungry? When does eating a lot become a binge that signals disordered eating?
  • broodmom
    broodmom Posts: 13
    /During the times I've been successful, I log carbs instead of calories and go by my sister's rule of not eating any carbs that don't have 3g or more in fiber. My diabetes coach put me on a 50 carb per meal diet, with 15 carb snacks in between. About 5 hours between meals, with snacks about 2-3 hours after a meal. At the end of the day, my calories are about 1200-1500, occas. 1800 a day, and I lose weight gradually without focusing on bad behavior. Snacks are things like a smallish orange or half banana, berries, etc, occas with a veggie added, or slice of Aunt Millie's cran-apple bread or Berry Merry muffin. This regular eating really helps keep me from sugar and fat cravings during the day.

    Try not to focus on sacrifices and instead on the joys of what you get to eat. And if you slip, shrug your shoulders and do better next day. Think of the off days not as "bad" behavior, just different. And activities or hobbies will help you get away from the food, too.

    And remember it didn't take a month to put on the weight, so if it takes you longer to take it off, that's Ok.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
    I have a serious issue with moderation control. I do everything in an all or nothing manner. I will eat 1200 calories everyday but if I eat even a little over that, I freak out and just binge. If I am exercising, I end up doing it like 3 hours a day or I just stop doing it all together.
    If I start a diet and fall off the band wagon, I'll just completely give up instead of just starting over the next day.
    I have been doing really good this time and I don't want my cycle to begin again. Does anybody else have this problem, and if so how do you control it?

    YES. (Immoderate response.)

    I don't believe that moderation is for everyone. It requires more thinking than the extreme position.

    I sometimes do Intermittent Fasting and a couple of times a year I go on a strict diet. My margin for error is so narrow that there are times when its simply easier to give my efforts a boost.

    I'm much better when I can control my environment. I try never to bring into the house food that I'll over-consume. But I'm often not in control.

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