weight loss fear

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rnd789
rnd789 Posts: 50 Member
in Motivation and Support
Losing weight is hard, but sometimes I think I stay within the "comfort" of being overweight, because that's all I've ever known. I've been approximately the same size since I was 14, and the lowest weight I've been was only 10 pounds lighter than this for a period of a few months last year. I envision my "true self" as someone who is healthier and looks better, but I feel as though I waste most of my time just imagining that instead of taking the necessary steps to have it happen. I have fears like - what if I lose the weight, and I spend all my time regretting how long it took me to do it? Or thoughts such as "I want to be attractive to others because of who I am, not how much I weigh...", but I usually just end up imagining how much more confident I'll be if I ever lose the weight I think I need to. I don't know if any of these fears or thoughts resound with anyone else, but if they do, how do you cope with them? I don't want to wake up one day and think "why didn't I at least try?"

Replies

  • healthym0m
    healthym0m Posts: 2 Member
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    I understand your thoughts and fears. It is the fear of the unknown. I tell you, the first time you hear someone comment about how good you look, it will make it all worth while. No, losing the weight will NOT solve all your problems, but it CAN show you what you are capable of doing. It is empowering. Also, you need to realize how healthy it is to lose weight and remember that too. (All of this, of course, is assuming you TRULY have some weight to lose--not already at an ideal weight, just wanting to be stick thin.)
  • futuredispatchhottie911
    futuredispatchhottie911 Posts: 163
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    I feel the same way and I haven't figured out how to work around it. 2 years ago I went to Las Vegas and lost 40 pounds but I gained it all back plus 20 pounds. I am going on another trip and I would love to lose 60 pounds that would be 10 pounds a week. But it seems like I always sabotage myself: -( I need to figure out a week to fix it.
  • katielouhoo
    katielouhoo Posts: 676 Member
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    i really knew i needed to diet & change my lifestyle for years, but just wouldn't. not fear so much as excuses. lots & lots of excuses. knowing that a healthy lifestyle is forever. you can't diet & be done. i kept saying i wasn't ready & wouldn't stick to it. (i did have years of yo-yo dieting when i was younger) and we all know yo-yoing is unhealthy, better not to try than to try and fail, right??

    well, i finally had enough, reached my limit and decided to face the truth & do something about it. i'm winning. it is hard, but it is happening. i am going to be healthier & have learned to live with a new lifestyle that i plan will keep me from ever having to face being soooo far overweight ever again. (healthy eating & living is forever and i may have to reign myself in, but i do not plan to ever get more than 10 lbs away from goal again- it is too hard)

    & no i won't regret this time, i need it to learn how my new lifestyle needs to look. & i am definitely doing this to be happy & healthy for myself, not for how anyone else sees me. i already feel sooo much better. i have been heavy for years & years, not even sure how i will look when i'm done, but i'm ready. good luck, you can do it one choice at a time. -katie
  • WebToes2001
    WebToes2001 Posts: 2
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    Great topic! You bring up a lot of fears I can relate to. I have also always been a little overweight, enough that I was chubby but not enough that it stopped me from playing sports or being active other ways. Just enough that I was always the heavier of my friends. Right after highschool I lost 25 lbs on a fasting/crash diet and I was so happy with myself and felt much more attractive. It took 2-3 years till I had gained it back. Since then I have gained another 30 lbs. I have dieted several times in the last 10 years and I get mad that I can't lose it as easy as I had that one time. Up untill last year I still thought of myself as a healthy, though chubby person. Now I am beginning to realize I'm not really healthy and this stupid extra weight is probably the reason I have back problems now, and why my knees are prone to aching after a workout. I feel like I am past the 'why not try' to "I need to get healthy now", but the fear that I will fail is always there. I think once I start making some progress I will finally believe it is possible again. It's inspirational that so many people on MFP write there success stories here. It's slowly starting to creep into my brain that it can be done, the healthy way this time. Hope hope the same for you. And don't worry, people will like you for who you are when you like who you are.
  • CoachJ77
    CoachJ77 Posts: 80 Member
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    It's interesting because when i was over weight I thought the same thing. I wondered, will a woman like me for me or will she like me for the thinner me and then like me. Well my answer has finally arrived. Liking one's personality is always possible, but with light weight, and most importantly being healthy, is what makes a person sexy. I personally love certain people's personality but dont find them sexy. I want my wife to be sexy in my eyes at least, I dont care what others think. I want a healthy, attractive and sexy wife that has a great personality. This isn't being shallow either, some people are just not attracted to others.

    As for regret, well I can't tell you that you will be so happy, but your body will be. Think of grabbing a 40 lb. weight... now think of subtracting it from your body (I dont know how much you want to lose but I lose that amount). Think of all the stress your body underwent while having the extra weight and now that it doesnt. There is the feeling of not sweating while walked, dancing etc. and also the feeling of not becoming diabetic or the feeling that you get when you see old pictures of yourself. I think you need to have the determination and only you can find that. Good luck and be comfy in whatever you choose :)

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