Just starting...

Hello! I'm 5'5 and about 60-70 lbs overweight. When my first marriage had physically and emotionally drained me I started going to the gym. I lived on base in Hawaii and everyone was always in a bikini....so there was alot of motivation. I lost about 30 lbs in less than a year and was the smallest I'd been since before having my 3 beautiful children. I divorced my husband and moved back to PA for a new start with my kids. After 3 years, I met my current husband and now I'm back to the yearly gains instead of a steady weight or losing anything. I can't say he's supportive one way or another on weight loss, but is the first to admit I've changed alot since we've been married (7 years now.) Even so far to call me "chubby" when we fight. Even with the apology afterwards, I can't get the words out of my head.
I want a permanent change and I want it to be for me and no one else... I feel like so much of my life is devoted to making others happy that I put my needs on hold and it's starting to take it's toll on me, especially weight wise... Stress eating and what not.
The final straw is losing my Dad 2 months ago. I can't even describe how that totally flipped my world upside down and left this huge void in my life. With that said and not going into too much detail, I read alot of posts on this site and also spent some time reading how many people are having many of the same issues I am and how we can all support one another. So it's definitely encouraging and I need to pull myself out of this state of mind before I get any worse than I already am.

Thank you for reading this and good luck to you!! Please feel free to add me as a friend if you think it will benefit our weightloss endeavours!!