Fitness Pal logic

Mutant13
Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
in Food and Nutrition
Just a bit of fun! This is my logic sometimes-


"Vodka comes from potatoes, so it's a vegetable. Right?"

"Store samples don't count.... Even if I eat all of them"

"if I just eat the crumbs in the cookie packet, there won't be many calories! *crush whole packet into crumbs*


"it's my cheat meal!....day....week"

Feel free to add yours!

Replies

  • Matt_Wild
    Matt_Wild Posts: 2,673 Member
    XYZ told me all calories are equal so a KFC is as good as ABC...
  • johloz
    johloz Posts: 176 Member
    If protein shakes/olive oil/whole wheat bread/fill-in-the-blank is healthy, then if I replace everything else in my diet with that, I'll be super healthy!
  • Chadomaniac
    Chadomaniac Posts: 1,785 Member
    XYZ told me all calories are equal so a KFC is as good as ABC...
    lmfao great 1
  • LittleMissDover
    LittleMissDover Posts: 820 Member
    It came off my boyfriend/ husband/ friend/ child's plate so doesn't count.
  • Matt_Wild
    Matt_Wild Posts: 2,673 Member
    You are a bodybuilder and your body uses food differently so you dieting isn't nearly the same as me.
  • BebeStyles
    BebeStyles Posts: 7
    It totally doesn't count if it's Christmas :P
  • laurenk182004
    laurenk182004 Posts: 1,882 Member
    "I've been good all day, I earned this (enter fatty food)"

    "Surely if I eat almost nothing, I'll lose weight faster and feel great because its calories in vs calories out"
  • bii14
    bii14 Posts: 192
    It came off my boyfriend/ husband/ friend/ child's plate so doesn't count.

    this.

    or a sip of cold drink from everyones bottle/glass, i didnt buy me a drink so it doesnt count :P
  • perfecting_emptiness
    perfecting_emptiness Posts: 49 Member
    If you don't cook it (enter cookie dough, cake batter, etc) then it doesn't count :tongue:
  • NatashaShen
    NatashaShen Posts: 295 Member
    i walked from the living room to the kitchen, that should have burned at least 5 calories. Time for a cookie!
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    :drinker: This one is true:

    If you break a cookie in half and *here's the secret* share it with a friend. All the calories fall out in the breaking of said cookie.

    Works with ALL kinds!:happy:

    Well it does:angry:



    :wink: :laugh:
  • glitteratthesea
    glitteratthesea Posts: 104 Member
    I agree with the vodka. 'It looks like water, so it must have the same amount of calories!!!'.

    'This is a box of chocolate I got from someone else. So it doesn't matter I eat one chocolate or all twelve.'
  • MrsWonderland
    MrsWonderland Posts: 107 Member
    :drinker: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: You just made my night
  • Zylahe
    Zylahe Posts: 772 Member
    :drinker: This one is true:

    If you break a cookie in half and *here's the secret* share it with a friend. All the calories fall out in the breaking of said cookie.

    Works with ALL kinds!:happy:

    Well it does:angry:



    :wink: :laugh:

    works with fries too,
    also any stolen food doesn't count as your friend/ SO has already allocated the calories to them.

    also as calories are a form of energy icecream has no calories as your body needs to warm it up to digest it.
    also food consumed while watching movies doesn't count as its part of the movie going experience.
  • SeaJenni
    SeaJenni Posts: 211 Member
    MFP says a vodka drink has 70 calories, so just get a really big glass and pour a triple, it's still only one drink.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    if you didnt log it, the calories dont count!!!
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
    The kangaroo didn't eat it.

    Funny, I wrote a blog about all this too.

    https://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/dsjohndrow/view/the-skinny-on-weight-loss-excuses-454845
  • wimeezer
    wimeezer Posts: 404 Member
    Favorite from a friend; "anything containing or consumed with a dairy product is healthy."

    :tongue:
  • zombilishious
    zombilishious Posts: 1,250 Member
    A diet soda is the same as water.

    If I quick add calories, no one knows I've cheated.

    Lifting weights will bulk me up. I only want to tone.

    Carbs are bad for you, so I can't eat that apple/carrot/{other fresh fruit or veggie}
  • Aello11
    Aello11 Posts: 312 Member
    tasting while cooking -- those calories don't count -

    and I agree 70 calories for crown - pour a triple in a very large glass :drinker:
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    1 cup= as much as I can possibly fit into my cup measure, piling it precariously high
  • xaniza
    xaniza Posts: 250 Member
    If it has fruit/veggies in it, it's good for you! :wink:
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    It didn't taste as good as I wanted it to so the calories aren't getting logged

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