Nervous to have my family see me

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cindl24
cindl24 Posts: 178
in Motivation and Support
In about a week I will be traveling to visit my parents for Christmas. My brother, sister-in-law and sister will be there too. While I know I will have a great time (we always do when we get together), I am very nervous to have them see me. They have all been very sweet and supportive about my weight loss process, but I worry they will be disappointed to see I am still chunky. I have lost almost 50 pounds at this point, but I am hardly thin and don't think the difference is so incredibly noticeable.

Am I just crazy? Ugh. Anyone else worry about this?
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Replies

  • rompers16
    rompers16 Posts: 5,404 Member
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    You're not alone. My son comes home tomorrow from college, my dad is visiting next week. They are all proud but I worry as well that their expectations will be higher than what reality is.
  • Chris1020
    Chris1020 Posts: 4 Member
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    Don't worry about what others think, take the stress off and enjoy your family. If they have been supportive I am sure they will continue to be and notice that you have lost a lot of weight. You probably just don't *see* it because you see yourself everyday :).
  • gonnamakeanewaccount
    gonnamakeanewaccount Posts: 642 Member
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    Let me just start off with, you are awesome. You are forty-eight pounds lighter than when you saw them last. Trust me, they will notice! Think about it, you may not notice it so much yourself because you see yourself every single day. It's really hard to see changes that way. I suggest taking a before and during photo. Once you do that, you'll see how much thinner and healthier you really look.

    Have a merry Christmas. <3
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    a loss is a loss is a loss....

    they won't be as emotionally tied up and invested in the loss and your body like you are....

    they simply won't....and they won't see your body the way you do....

    so just relax and enjoy visiting with them....

    I still have 50 pounds to lose and everytime I see my father he shakes his head and says "Honey, I don't know where that other 50 is gonna come from" Whereas I can see VERY clearly where its going to come from.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
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    They're going to say, "Omigosh! You look amazing!!!" ... and if they don't, I will. Don't sweat it. You've done an amazing job.
  • RevCO30
    RevCO30 Posts: 176 Member
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    Trust me, they will notice! Think about it, you may not notice it so much yourself because you see yourself every single day. It's really hard to see changes that way.

    This is basically what I was going to say. Way to go on the weight loss!
  • CristyMusicLovr
    CristyMusicLovr Posts: 179 Member
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    I looked at your pictures and its a huge difference! just relax and have fun. Remember your family loves your no matter what!
  • wswilliams67
    wswilliams67 Posts: 938 Member
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    50 pounds will be noticeable. trust me. I've lost 50 so far and people say I'm fading away... even at 270! It's YOUR journey. You've made an incredible change so far. Be proud of it. Dismiss the haters. Have fun.
  • ExplorinLauren
    ExplorinLauren Posts: 991 Member
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    In about a week I will be traveling to visit my parents for Christmas. My brother, sister-in-law and sister will be there too. While I know I will have a great time (we always do when we get together), I am very nervous to have them see me. They have all been very sweet and supportive about my weight loss process, but I worry they will be disappointed to see I am still chunky. I have lost almost 50 pounds at this point, but I am hardly thin and don't think the difference is so incredibly noticeable.

    Am I just crazy? Ugh. Anyone else worry about this?

    No you aren't crazy. You're just used to being heavier. Now, you aren't... but you still feel "chunky" They saw you with 50 extra pounds!!!
    If you lost 50 lbs... trust me, they'll notice :) relax and enjoy yourself. Everything you are thinking is in your head, not theirs. :flowerforyou:
  • BigDnSW
    BigDnSW Posts: 641 Member
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    I hear ya...my family is so cruel, they used to call me Orca. However, I have learned that if I truly love myself in a healthy way, I will love them as well. I really don't care anymore what people think about me, but I care deeply how I think about others and how I treat them.

    Be yourself...laugh...enjoy..they'll notice not only a weight and inches loss, but a happy person...

    Good luck!!!
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Cind & Romper

    1rst Your family loves you regardless of your successes, failures and appearance, and 2nd, a weight loss is noticeable, especially a 50#.

    Romper your son probably wouldnt notice if you gained or lost weight unless you lost a heck of a lot....and if that is a current pic of you in your profile unlax. You will make the grade.

    Enjoy Christmas with your families and stop the silly - self defeating thoughts; there are more important things in life.
  • adavis59
    adavis59 Posts: 285 Member
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    Losing 48 pounds is no small feat. They will notice the difference. You see yourself everyday and so you have gotten used to seeing yourself one way, but others will see the difference. Just remember, a master piece has never been created in 1 day, it takes time from start to finish. consider yourself a master piece in the making. :)
  • junodog1
    junodog1 Posts: 4,792 Member
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    I want you to come back to this thread and give us an update. I want you to be able to say how pleased they were for you. That should be a big NSV for you and an affirmation.
  • cindl24
    cindl24 Posts: 178
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    I want you to come back to this thread and give us an update. I want you to be able to say how pleased they were for you. That should be a big NSV for you and an affirmation.

    I like that idea and promise to follow through on this and let you know how they react.

    As stated before, my family has been very supportive and I think that is part of the reason I don't want to be a disappointment. My step-mom even has called me to ask what foods to have available for me so I don't have to worry about what I eat while visiting and I am planning some bike rides with my sister during the visit.

    One thing is for sure, I will have a great time regardless. I'll be getting there kind of late in the evening, so if the reaction isn't great, I'll have the night to get over it. I just worry about living up to expectations.
  • cindl24
    cindl24 Posts: 178
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    I looked at your pictures and its a huge difference! just relax and have fun. Remember your family loves your no matter what!

    Thanks!
  • cindl24
    cindl24 Posts: 178
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    Thanks to everyone for the kind words and support. It's so easy for me to be positive and supportive to others, but not so easy to do so for myself. Go figure. LOL
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
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    I want you to come back to this thread and give us an update. I want you to be able to say how pleased they were for you. That should be a big NSV for you and an affirmation.

    I like that idea and promise to follow through on this and let you know how they react.

    As stated before, my family has been very supportive and I think that is part of the reason I don't want to be a disappointment. My step-mom even has called me to ask what foods to have available for me so I don't have to worry about what I eat while visiting and I am planning some bike rides with my sister during the visit.

    One thing is for sure, I will have a great time regardless. I'll be getting there kind of late in the evening, so if the reaction isn't great, I'll have the night to get over it. I just worry about living up to expectations.

    STOP IT.

    Be careful that you may be expecting too big of a reaction from them. If so you will be disappointed. Focus on the joy of seeing your family, not your weight.

    Hoping the best for you gal.
  • MrsWonderland
    MrsWonderland Posts: 107 Member
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    50lbs is awesome and noticable. I read some where on here that it can take a long time to see a difference in ourselves. Our mind still sees the same person and no changes. Pictures are where we see the difference. How can they not be happy with 50lbs gone. Sounds like you have a wonderful family, I think they will be very happy. And you should be very happy knowing how far you came. Im proud of my total of 16lbs so far, but that does not compair to 50lbs, which is truely awesome!!! Just go and enjoy your family and know that you have worked hard, be proud of that!!! :drinker:
  • ashleighlive
    ashleighlive Posts: 43 Member
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    I totally understand, I have a negative attitude toward my body and always think I look much bigger than anyone's perception of me so I get anxious seeing my family for that reason.
    I self sabotage before I see them to make myself look, well more so feel worse than reality.
    It’s disappointing when no one mentions your hard work, and more so when the feedback isn’t what you expect or anticipate.
    But remember who you are on this journey for, yourself I hope.
    Yes praise is fantastic, ESPECIALLY from those you love, but use this as motivation to work harder up until then, and then up until your next visit.
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
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    Fifty pounds is a huge accomplishment! Family can sometimes disappoint us if they don't react the way we would like, but that doesn't diminish what you've already achieved and what you will achieve in the future!

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