When will I feel success??

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MurielHeslop
MurielHeslop Posts: 24
in Motivation and Support
I have lost a total of 112 pounds, 14 since I joined MFP. I feel great when I put on my size 16 pants ( my biggest size was a 30 ) but when I see myself in pictures I feel so discouraged. I see others who are my weight now (206 lbs) and they look fantastic! And my hanging belly is another story...I feel like I have worked so hard and yet my body is still so gross, I can't afford a tummy tuck and who knows when I will... I still have to hide my body with long tops and loose dresses. Anyone else feel so discouraged after a long and hard journey to look and feel better?

Replies

  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
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    I am right there with you. I started at 338 pounds, and am now at 226. I still feel huge most of the time! But as far as looking at others pictures and thinking that they look better than you, you probably are just judging yourself more harshly than you are others. You probably look similiar to some of them, and just don't realize it. I am also experiencing a serious plateau, so for me that is making things worse! But you have lost a LOT of weight, just try to focus on how far you have come, and how much healthier you are now! That is what I do, and it does help. Because even though I am still overweight, I do recognize that I am in a MUCH better place than I was when I started!
  • jasonp_ritzert
    jasonp_ritzert Posts: 357 Member
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    You lost 112 lbs and you feel discouraged? You basically lost the weight equivalent to another human being! That is a huge accomplishment than anyone should be proud of. Everyone loses/carries weight differently and no one is created equal to anyone else. Keep up the hard work. Maybe a change in workout routine or new exercies will help you see changes you want. I know that they are expensive, but sometime investing in a few rounds with a personal trainer can help a lot.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    this is what happens when people only aim for their goal weight and think they are going to get their goal body.
  • misscristie
    misscristie Posts: 643 Member
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    SPANX! These are your friend. Seriously. I may not look good naked, but I look pretty good with clothes on. That's the best I can do for now.
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,583 Member
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    How YOU see yourself is always going to be harder to deal with. Even folks that lose a ton of weight and don't have loose skin or other side effects often deal with a projected self image and have to come to grips with that. Losing the amount that you've lost is a phenomenal thing and while it may not be the advice you're looking for, you should be ridiculously pleased with yourself. Even aside from the outward appearance and from a health standpoint, your efforts should never be any less than applauded.

    If I CAN make a recommendation as for changing the appearance, I'm a little over a month into lifting heavy.. and the difference has been really really noticeable.

    Congrats on what you've done already. I don't know you, but I'm proud of you.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
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    I mainly have loose skin under my arms. It sucks! Hopefully it will get better over time! Just got to concentrate on how much healthier you feel... The rest will hopefully come x
  • LAMypie
    LAMypie Posts: 127 Member
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    You've lost over double what I have, although it sounds like we started close to the same. What helps me the most when I'm feeling all whaleish, is to compare a recent pic to my starting pic. I know that I'm going to have a TON of loose skin when I reach goal, but I'm okay with that. Why? Because I'm doing this to be healthy. I'm already thinking ahead to what kind of compression clothes I'll need to wear the clothes I want. Being healthy is the most important thing. But seeing how far you've come can help with those feelings. Everyone is made different. Be proud you've come so far!! You are an inspiration!!!
  • MurielHeslop
    MurielHeslop Posts: 24
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    Thank you! I guess I just woke up in a blue mood, it happens occasionally. I do try to stay positive but I have my moments. I will definitely invest in some SPANX!

    this is what happens when people only aim for their goal weight and think they are going to get their goal body, great statement and I see the truth behind it, any suggestions besides the comment?
  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
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    this is what happens when people only aim for their goal weight and think they are going to get their goal body.

    This is not true. I am not concerned about my final weight, I am concerned about being healthy and fit. I have not starved myself to get to where I am, I have made healthy food choices and exercised.
  • beachlover317
    beachlover317 Posts: 2,848 Member
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    this is what happens when people only aim for their goal weight and think they are going to get their goal body.

    Truth. Lift. Lift heavy...another truth.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    this is what happens when people only aim for their goal weight and think they are going to get their goal body.

    This is not true. I am not concerned about my final weight, I am concerned about being healthy and fit. I have not starved myself to get to where I am, I have made healthy food choices and exercised.

    I didnt say anything about healthy or fit.

    I said people who aim for a certain weight and expect a certain body. easily mistakable :)

    I was also talking to the OP not you babydoll :flowerforyou:
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
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    Start lifting heavy things to shape and sculpt your body. I have a long ways to go but when I switched from almost all cardio to more heavy lifting the pounds didn't come off as quick but the inches did. I'm with you on the extra skin thing and with time and lot6s of lifting and water I'm hoping that changes
  • betoarango
    betoarango Posts: 222 Member
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    I think you are already a success and look great... my wife has some extra skinon her belly after our second son... so she bought some corsets (very sexy ones) and wears them around me, it boosts her self esteem and I like them a lot.
    To be honest I dont care if she wears them or not but she does... and it makes her so much more confident, and that translates into great bedtimes.

    She doesnt know it but she's getting the tummy tuck for Xmas.. LOL nobody knows..jajajaj
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    wow youre kind of awesome.
  • MurielHeslop
    MurielHeslop Posts: 24
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    Maybe my reason to lose weight was a bit vain, maybe I did lose it for the wrong reason and that is where my thinking got jumbled. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004 and underwent a radical mastectomy, My plastic surgeon would not reconstruct until I lost 80 lbs, well I lost more than 80 lbs but I also lost my health insurance, I do feel healthier and it feels good to move around freely, I just wish I either had 2 boobs and a super flabby tummy or a nicer tummy and 1 boob, just not both...
  • dym123
    dym123 Posts: 1,670 Member
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    Have nothing to add, just that I love your name. Muriel's Wedding is one of my favorite movies. Unless your name really is Muriel Heslop, then, never mind.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    BUT YOU CANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

    WHO ON THIS WIDE GREEN SPINNING ROCK SAID YOU CANNOT HAVE A BEAUTIFUL FIT STRONG BODY???? WHO SAID IT? I WILL CRUSH THEM FOR YOU.
  • unmitigatedbadassery
    unmitigatedbadassery Posts: 653 Member
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    Am I happy with my progress thus far? Yes..
    Do I look like a CK model? No.
    Do I annoyingly answer my own questions? Absolutely.

    The bottom line is you've lost 100+ lbs and you should be stoked about it! You didn't get where you were over night, you certainly won't get where you WANT to be over night either. You are doing fantastic - keep it up!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    I never said anyone did anything for the wrong reasons or that they didnt want to be healthy. NOWHERE did I say this.

    I said... if you aim for a certain weight- all you'll get is the number you want. If you aim for a body you want, you'll most likely end up with that.

    If you want to weigh 140 pounds (just picked a random number) so you remove 30 (also random) pounds of fat - then you now weigh 140. Your skin is all loose, you're still weak, you're still depriving yourself of food, there's no real bad habit removal, there is no extra energy or elevated mood levels. There is probably a disconnect between what you look like in your head and what you look like in reality.

    If you want a fit beautiful body - then you're not going to care what that body weighs. You're going to be working your body so that you have sleek strong arms, powerful smooth legs, a tight torso and the back and butt of a warrior... I could go on and on. Focusing on all of these things, and making sure you make generally good eating choices - will lead you to a sculpted body that will weigh somewhere between 140 and 160 probably.

    which do you choose?
  • Shikonneko
    Shikonneko Posts: 187 Member
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    SPANX! These are your friend. Seriously. I may not look good naked, but I look pretty good with clothes on. That's the best I can do for now.

    Or a Squeem. I love my vest to bits and bits, you should give 'em a look.

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