Oh no you did not just say that!

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gonezobean
gonezobean Posts: 154
in Motivation and Support
So I went home Saturday because my brother came in town for a weekend. He is a freshman at Cal State Long Beach and graces us with his presence ever 2 years. Having him home is a true treat. So I trekked up to Northern Il, with groceries in the back. I decided I would make the fam-jam a meal. I had butternut squash and a great recipe for shrimp Alfred. Being from an Italian family the healthy crème sauce was going to rustle some feathers.

Dinner went over great. Everyone was really impressed by the meal and the evening was great.

Sunday morning I was eating some cereal from the box before church when my mom comes in the kitchen and yells at me. She says, “Quit munching you’re going to get fat again!”

OH NO YOU DID NOT!

First off I have lost 20+ pounds eating any damn way I please. Second, I’m grown.

I was furious. I am still furious.

Thanks for reading/ listening.
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Replies

  • gonezobean
    gonezobean Posts: 154
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    So I went home Saturday because my brother came in town for a weekend. He is a freshman at Cal State Long Beach and graces us with his presence ever 2 years. Having him home is a true treat. So I trekked up to Northern Il, with groceries in the back. I decided I would make the fam-jam a meal. I had butternut squash and a great recipe for shrimp Alfred. Being from an Italian family the healthy crème sauce was going to rustle some feathers.

    Dinner went over great. Everyone was really impressed by the meal and the evening was great.

    Sunday morning I was eating some cereal from the box before church when my mom comes in the kitchen and yells at me. She says, “Quit munching you’re going to get fat again!”

    OH NO YOU DID NOT!

    First off I have lost 20+ pounds eating any damn way I please. Second, I’m grown.

    I was furious. I am still furious.

    Thanks for reading/ listening.
  • Fab140
    Fab140 Posts: 1,976 Member
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    Mothers sometimes lose their sensitivity chips.....Goodness!

    :flowerforyou: Bravo on the weight loss and to heck with bad mojo from parents and friends who mean well but forgot to think before they said a word. :flowerforyou:
  • sculley
    sculley Posts: 2,012 Member
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    :noway: Wow that was kind of harsh
  • alf1163
    alf1163 Posts: 3,143 Member
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    Awwwwwwwww You just have to forgive her and forget. She is your mother... Do you have children? Even when we get older our parents still see us as children. I know my parents do and I see my children the same way... I am sure she did not mean to hurt you with her comment. I am guessing she was just trying to be helpful and protect you from going overboard with the snacking. What works best for me if my mom makes a comment that hurts me in some way is to disregard it or just respectfully tell her what I think about her comment.

    Keep up the good work. You are doing great!!! :flowerforyou:
  • Life_is_Good
    Life_is_Good Posts: 361 Member
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    I'm not sure how old your mom is, but I know with my own mother as she gets older there's alot more "wow" factor that seems to come out of her mouth :noway: . You need to graciously call her on it. She probably didn't even realize she hurt your feelings.
  • barracudamuscle
    barracudamuscle Posts: 313 Member
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    Thats too bad, yes I agree parents say some things they don't even think about. Like when I told my dad I was planning on getting married, that weekend I was planning it we flew out to my home town and drove up on top of Pike Peak, anyways all he kept telling me was it will be the biggest mistake of my life, blah blah, why buy the cow when your getting the milk for free ( and I wonder why he wants a divorce after 36 years or marriage) and trying to talk me out of it.

    Well needless to say I just got back from Iraq, and I really have a short circuit for disrespect, my dad and I went out and we had what I'll refer to as "constructive critizism."

    With smart *kitten* comments or rude comments I tell them (really only my dad) Keep up that kind of talk your not even going to get a window in the nursing home!

    That usually stirs the pot.......:bigsmile:
  • briblue72
    briblue72 Posts: 672 Member
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    "drove up on top of Pike Peak"

    My dad drove us up that mountain twice when I was a kid... I think just to scare us! He had this giant Chevy van and some of those roads were dirt with no guard rail! :devil:
  • briblue72
    briblue72 Posts: 672 Member
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    People at my work have said stuff like that. They'll get food from McDonalds or wherever for lunch, and no one even asks me if I want anything. If I complain they say, "well, we didn't think you'd want to put on any weight..."

    As harsh and critical as it sounds, I think people are just trying to use "tough love" to support us.
    :grumble:
  • bryna75
    bryna75 Posts: 2
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    I had that same type of situation with my mom this weekend. I went to the movies Friday and of course got a small buttered popcorn - I know, bad, but I felt a well deserved treat. So my mother, the next day asked me if I got popcorn. Yes, I said. She said, well.... you deserve to have a fat a** then. What?!?!?!?!? What a mean thing to say.
  • drtbottom
    drtbottom Posts: 14 Member
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    Your story is a riot!! I face the same comments when i go home. Oh no, might not want to try that Potato Pie, but being in a healthy family i would look funny at 135 lbs. Lucky for us, we have found our happy medium. I like cereal too...HA,HA:laugh:
  • FatDancer
    FatDancer Posts: 812 Member
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    My Mother is a Wildcat! I decided along time ago just to let her Mother me anyway she wants...I accept and love her just like she is and I still do things my own way!

    She is rather physic and her intuitions have always been right on!
  • peej76
    peej76 Posts: 1,250 Member
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    Why is it, when people know your trying to lose weight, they either try to sabotage you by pushing food on you, or they make mean comments about everything you eat! Don't you all wish people would just start minding their own business??
  • abbychelle07
    abbychelle07 Posts: 656 Member
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    Why is it, when people know your trying to lose weight, they either try to sabotage you by pushing food on you, or they make mean comments about everything you eat! Don't you all wish people would just start minding their own business??

    Agree! There doesn't seem to be a happy medium. People are always trying to get me to eat something, and make a big deal if I don't, OR they tell me to stop eating! :grumble:
  • barracudamuscle
    barracudamuscle Posts: 313 Member
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    "drove up on top of Pike Peak"

    My dad drove us up that mountain twice when I was a kid... I think just to scare us! He had this giant Chevy van and some of those roads were dirt with no guard rail! :devil:

    I told everyone I proposed to her up there that way if she said no I'd kick her over the edge and make it look like and accident and save myself the embarassment!!!:happy:

    Luckily for both of us she said yes :heart: :bigsmile: :drinker:
  • MInnesotaNice
    MInnesotaNice Posts: 28
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    my mom does that too! I feel the same way obviously I know what I'm eating and probably already feel bad enough...... Moms can be too much sometimes!
  • maverickyanda
    maverickyanda Posts: 422 Member
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    Thats too bad, yes I agree parents say some things they don't even think about. Like when I told my dad I was planning on getting married, that weekend I was planning it we flew out to my home town and drove up on top of Pike Peak, anyways all he kept telling me was it will be the biggest mistake of my life, blah blah, why buy the cow when your getting the milk for free ( and I wonder why he wants a divorce after 36 years or marriage) and trying to talk me out of it.

    Well needless to say I just got back from Iraq, and I really have a short circuit for disrespect, my dad and I went out and we had what I'll refer to as "constructive critizism."

    With smart *kitten* comments or rude comments I tell them (really only my dad) Keep up that kind of talk your not even going to get a window in the nursing home!

    That usually stirs the pot.......:bigsmile:

    Coloradoan here...
  • maverickyanda
    maverickyanda Posts: 422 Member
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    And your mom was being nasty.

    What did you say?

    Love and accept her the way she is? Well, no. You can love her and respect her as your mom but you don't have to respect her calling you names or insinuating stuff like that.

    //dr phil.
  • flcaoh
    flcaoh Posts: 444
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    I get the same type of comments from my aunt Zula. She's in her 90's and every time I go home (about once a year) she comments on my weight, especially if I'm eating something she doesn't deem healthy.

    Frustrating thing is, Aunt Zula weighs all of 95 pounds soaking wet and I bet she's never weighed more than that in her life. Grrr...
  • Lavendersunday
    Lavendersunday Posts: 458 Member
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    You should have told her as if I was acting for the Academy Awards, "Mom...thank God I have Your good genes for losing weight or this could be the undoing of my diet completely!!"

    Humor goes a long way when dealing with the fam...Italian dinner or not!! Don't get MAD...GET FUNNY :smile: :wink: :laugh:

    ~Namaste
  • gonezobean
    gonezobean Posts: 154
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    I already allotted the calories. I knew what I was doing.

    Yes she is my mother. yes I respect her. yes i know the older she gets the crazy she gets.

    my reaction was:
    I gave her "the face"...the you disappoint me face. She knew she was wrong. no comments or sarcastic bites were needed.

    truth:
    I think what really got me was the crazy flash back. When I was a pre-teen through high school she defaulted to "fat *****" when we got into arguments. I guess we are just so close now,shes my best friend, that i didn't see it coming.

    Thanks again for listening.

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