stalker wife!
Replies
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He probably would get upset. Hence, I don't post often and would NEVER post in the threads that are not relevant to fitness or that are even mildly flirtatious in nature.0
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You didn't came off as a jerk or anything at all and I personally feel silly even continuing this thread since the OP deactivated so I assume he just wanted to start drama or whatever.
I realize tha it was fun and games and I also realize that we have our own motivations. The point I was trying to make is that we all have our reasons. Sometimes, being desired by others, even if you are married, can be a motivation too. I mean, when you aren't around your husband do you not dress in dirty old clothes only? Of course not. You dress up decently. This doesn't mean that you will go and shag the next guy that says hello.
The men only comment I think I mistook your post a wee bit and admitedly thought that you were talking only about men. It was my fault and I apologize.
I also understand that it is a respect thing however, sometimes the demands are ridiculous. If your husband came up to you tomorrow and demanded you not talk to any guy. Ever! Wouldn't you say "who the heck are you to say that...?" Then why do you think its appropriate for a women to say that you cannot participate in these forums. I know my example isn't the best but hopefully it still made the point clear. What are the chances of him getting with one of these girls all the way from Kuwait...?
Hahah....you actually made your point on this one. At first I was sitting here thinking "Why the heck does someone need to post in those message boards?"...when you had mentioned that everybody has their reasons. I didn't get it totally at first. But now that you point out the desire to be desired, I totally get it!
I completely get the whole being deployed thing....and from what I saw, he's been deployed A LOT. You don't get too much opposite sex interaction....and I'd imagine he doesn't get to talk to his wife all too often. So I guess I understand why he'd still want to feel/hear someone else say they'd bang him. hahha! Of course, it isn't as great on the other side of it.0 -
if you want to have a harmless flirt over the interwebs, why not just have 2 accounts and only tell her about 1?
i wouldn't mind if my hubby flirted. but i wouldn't want to see what he was saying!0 -
if you want to have a harmless flirt over the interwebs, why not just have 2 accounts and only tell her about 1?
i wouldn't mind if my hubby flirted. but i wouldn't want to see what he was saying!
Because these things creates doubt in a relationship and doubt is like a fresh new paper. Once you crumble it, no matter how hard to smooth it out, it will never be the same as a new paper.
Many people can be open minded but having 2 accounts and using the other account purely for flirting gives suspicion.0 -
if you want to have a harmless flirt over the interwebs, why not just have 2 accounts and only tell her about 1?
i wouldn't mind if my hubby flirted. but i wouldn't want to see what he was saying!
Oooooo girl!! That's getting into shady territory! Hahahha! I do not like being lied to or having secrets. I guess I'm just such an open, honest person, I go completely nuts if I don't get that in return.0 -
I wouldn't be totally stoked if I was married to you and saw some of the things you've posted in. What's the point of those silly "snog, marry, whatever" posts? They are just dumb to me anyways.....let alone, for a married man to be posting in. I don't like the idea of married people with wandering eyes.....and that's basically what that is. There are a MILLION other message boards you could occupy your time with.
She said it best. Nice explanation.0 -
My boy knows he knows its a form of confidence building so he dosant care why should he its harmless fun with strangers around the world tell her to play on them x0
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If my husband came in here, and I thought he was flirting and playing around, yeah I would get jealous. Thats why he has all my passwords and I have his. Never had a reason to worry though. lol Maybe put your wife on your friends list and talk to her?0
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if you want to have a harmless flirt over the interwebs, why not just have 2 accounts and only tell her about 1?
i wouldn't mind if my hubby flirted. but i wouldn't want to see what he was saying!
Because these things creates doubt in a relationship and doubt is like a fresh new paper. Once you crumble it, no matter how hard to smooth it out, it will never be the same as a new paper.
Many people can be open minded but having 2 accounts and using the other account purely for flirting gives suspicion.
however, i trust my hubby. i already know he's a shocking flirt. so am i! if i want to flirt (and flirt- not talk dirty or be sexually graphic) i will. and he doesn't mind either. we both know we're not going to do anything.
if OP wants to flirt (and nothing else) and his wife is too insecure to allow him to do it, then yeah, open up a different account. only if you know that it won't lead anywhere. if you're a fella on the cusp of throwing one in someone else, then don't tempt fate (unless cheating is something you're looking for- if it is then you're a cad and a scoundrel!).0 -
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My husband is on MFP with me and I had no idea that the Chit-Chat Fun and Games was a taboo area. I thought it was for jokes and stupid stuff. Is it for creeping and hook-ups, too? Gross. Is your wife mad because you're in this section or is she mad because you're flirting with hot chicks? I would NOT be ok with it if my man was flirting with other women, but since he doesn't seem to be into that sort of thing, I don't really care where he goes.0
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How would YOU feel if you knew she was talking to men while your away ("even if she wasn't trying to bang them") Also, sounds like you gave her reason to be concerned??
If you respected her and your marriage, you'd comply with what you two agree & compromise on...Together!!
You want to know what I'd do?
I'd respect my spouses's feelings.0 -
^^^^^^How would YOU feel if you knew she was talking to men while your away ("even if she wasn't trying to bang them") Also, sounds like you gave her reason to be concerned??
If you respected her and your marriage, you'd comply with what you two agree & compromise on...Together!!
You want to know what I'd do?
I'd respect my spouses's feelings.
THIS
:laugh:My Girlfriend is very jealous type so I understand
Just kidding, my hand doesn't get jealous!0 -
There are some mightily insecure women in this thread. If you think men AND women dont mentally "rate" people they pass by in person each and every single day, youre delusional. What makes it any different typing it into a silly post on a message board to a bunch of complete strangers??
If the person took it a step further and started some 1 on 1 messaging and flirting, then I agree that is something else altogether. But the chit chat threads should never be taken seriously. Its a quick distraction and people are FAR too kind (ie: untruthful) anyway in those threads, so who really cares?0 -
bump0
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Men totally suck! OMG, I can't believe he would be so horrible to his wife as to be online playing games like this. After a whole bunch of years with the same person, I figured out that flirting is the most horriblest thing ever. We never, ever, ever, ever do it online or in person, not even to get free upgrades. It's cheating on each other to glance at another human being and think, "man, he's kinda hot" or "her rack is huge," so we always stare only at each other. We tell each other absolutely everything and share everything, even the tiniest, most insignificant details of what we do all day when the other isn't around. Sometimes it takes us two or three hours of constant talking to get out all the details. Our relationship is just peachy!
No? Actually, no. Flirting online isn't cheating. It isn't even remotely akin to cheating. Cheating is when two people consciously get together and put their uglies together. Or when people get together and form an emotional bond that makes them want to put their uglies together. Expecting more than that out of human beings puts an awful lot of undue pressure on a relationship.
So maybe you have a guy who only ever looks at you and only ever wants to hang out with you, or you have a wife who is a class-5 clinger, and you like that. That's just fine and dandy, but it isn't realistic.
Now, a guy who calls his wife a "stalker" because she opens an MFP account probably shouldn't be married, because, well, he insults her by saying he married a stalker. That speaks more about how little he respects her than about some stupid flirting on the internet.0 -
Have respect for you wife. Yes, men and women do mentally "rate" each other but most have enough respect to NOT do it in front of her/him. It's disgusting to me for a man to check me out while holding his wifes hand. DISGUSTING. I have so much respect for my husband that I don't get involved in the "rate the person before you" crap...and enough self esteem that I don't need to be rated. Do we flirt with other people? Probably...we just don't go overboard and disrespect each other....he may go nuts when I'm not sitting there beside him...I wouldn't know..and I like it that way!!
My husband was in the military and it was SUPER hard to be without him for 6 months or more out of the year. It does seem to make women a bit insecure to be alone...instead of feeding her insecurity maybe you should be reassuring her. Once she decides you will cheat.... it will be over! You won't be able to go to the store without her!! And emotional cheating is just as bad and physical... if you need to be fed some compliments or feed some compliments...call your wife. She's good for both!0 -
How would YOU feel if you knew she was talking to men while your away ("even if she wasn't trying to bang them") Also, sounds like you gave her reason to be concerned??
If you respected her and your marriage, you'd comply with what you two agree & compromise on...Together!!
You want to know what I'd do?
I'd respect my spouses's feelings.
She may be. He's in Kuwait with what is very likely no access to the women he's flirting with. Which makes it very harmless. She's home with all kinds of access.0 -
I'm a big person on respect. And to me, it sounds like you are disrespecting her. To post in those date/marry/one night stand boards anyways...you have to know that's not appropriate. Then to call your wife a "stalker wife".....again, not appropriate. Take into account her feelings. If it makes her uncomfortable, maybe you should consider not doing it at all and if you don't understand why it makes her uncomfortable, you two should really discuss it. Some people aren't bothered by that kind of stuff, but it doesn't make someone crazy if they are.
I don't think playing those games are disrespectful as long as you are upfront and honest about it. If he's hiding it, yeah, that's sketchy.
I do agree that creating a thread about her and calling it Stalker Wife just led him to huge probs. Maybe that's why he deactivated his account...lol.
I disagree. I think it's disrespectful in general, but super disrespectful when he is overseas and doesn't have him by her side to reassure and confirm their love. She misses him, and likely thinks of him often. She witnesses him talking about other women he feels are hot and would bang if given the opportunity. I'd be extremely hurt and upset if my husband did that.0 -
Men totally suck! OMG, I can't believe he would be so horrible to his wife as to be online playing games like this. After a whole bunch of years with the same person, I figured out that flirting is the most horriblest thing ever. We never, ever, ever, ever do it online or in person, not even to get free upgrades. It's cheating on each other to glance at another human being and think, "man, he's kinda hot" or "her rack is huge," so we always stare only at each other. We tell each other absolutely everything and share everything, even the tiniest, most insignificant details of what we do all day when the other isn't around. Sometimes it takes us two or three hours of constant talking to get out all the details. Our relationship is just peachy!
^^ This. I started letting my wife just smell my underwear when I walk though the door. Pretty much I insist on it to prove I haven't been to the gentleman's club again. She hates it after my long run, but really once you get a system down path, just insist on it. The key to any good relationship is insistence.0 -
Men totally suck! OMG, I can't believe he would be so horrible to his wife as to be online playing games like this. After a whole bunch of years with the same person, I figured out that flirting is the most horriblest thing ever. We never, ever, ever, ever do it online or in person, not even to get free upgrades. It's cheating on each other to glance at another human being and think, "man, he's kinda hot" or "her rack is huge," so we always stare only at each other. We tell each other absolutely everything and share everything, even the tiniest, most insignificant details of what we do all day when the other isn't around. Sometimes it takes us two or three hours of constant talking to get out all the details. Our relationship is just peachy!
^^ This. I started letting my wife just smell my underwear when I walk though the door. Pretty much I insist on it to prove I haven't been to the gentleman's club again. She hates it after my long run, but really once you get a system down path, just insist on it. The key to any good relationship is insistence.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruef7aYCEbc 0 -
not trying to get people "on my side" just wanna know what other people think
I think that other people think that you are a nob...0 -
You called your wife a stalker. You are spending your time chatting up others when you could be talking to her. And you are making light of it... I think it is not her that's the problem.0
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You aren't with her... She is insecure and girls are crazy when they feel insecure. If you love her you can't doanything that makes her think you are more interested in annonymous people on mfp than in contacting her. This could have been a way fro her to feel closer to you. If she is jealous there is a REAL reason, find out what it is and talk to her about it. And if its long term don't ever post about it on a public site full of strangers... That'll end a relationship real fast0
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Edit to say the OP has DEACTIVATED his account.
Troll!0 -
I don't think my hubby would care as long as I wasn't doing anything disrespectful to him and I wouldn't do that. So as long as your not telling other women how hot they are and flirting I don't see the problem.0
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Jesus said a man who looks at a women desirably has committed adultery in his heart.
You may think it is unrealistic to not flirt or check people out, but I disagree. If you are satisfied in your relationship, there is no need for wandering eyes.0 -
Jesus said a man who looks at a women desirably has committed adultery in his heart.
You may think it is unrealistic to not flirt or check people out, but I disagree. If you are satisfied in your relationship, there is no need for wandering eyes.
I don't think its adultery in your heart we are concerned about, its adultery in your pants.0 -
Jesus said a man who looks at a women desirably has committed adultery in his heart.
You may think it is unrealistic to not flirt or check people out, but I disagree. If you are satisfied in your relationship, there is no need for wandering eyes.
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the fact that you posted this as a way to open your wife up to possible ridicule says very, very little about your character! Could it be she already knows you're a scumbag and she's hoping to catch you in something that would give her a good reason to leave your sorry self!0
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