Obsessed with Perfection

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chocobunny122
chocobunny122 Posts: 21
in Motivation and Support
Hi. I have a confession to make..... I am obsessed with perfection and I feel like if I am anything less than perfect, than I dont deserve to be happy. I think about weight lost constantly and cant eat like a normal person anymore. Ive been so depressed over the fact that I dont have a perfectly flat stomach. I am not "fat" however I dont have a flat stomach, I do have a little stomach pooch or mufintop as some call it. I feel like all my friends and the people around me have perfect bodies and I am the odd one out. I have lost about 12 lbs since the start of the year and am currently 138 lbs and 5'7. I keep telling myself that if I lose 8 more lbs than I will be happy but only then I will be happy... I hate waking up every morning and going to school and not being happy. I also hate being so obsessed about being perfect. I have an hour glass figure which people have told me they envy but honestly, I am super embaressed about my body. I would love some advice on how to just be happy and accept who I am and to stop being so obsessed with looking like a victoria secret model. Thank you <3 feel free to friend me if you like as well.

Replies

  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    There is no answer anyone else can give, no magic cure other than learning to love the person you are inside, and stopping allowing the media facade of perfection to control you. No-one is perfect, and quite frankly, I find perfection rather boring. It leaves no quality of uniqueness.
  • ubermensch13
    ubermensch13 Posts: 824 Member
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    This isn't meant to be rude but, you should talk to a therapist. These people are trained to deal with these types of control issues. Plus, many of the questions you are asking can lead to depression and other disorders that need more support than a health and fitness forum. My guess is no matter what someone says here today in response will convince you long term to think otherwise. Changing that type of deep rooting thinking will require real work and expertise(very much like we work to change our bodies). Good luck on your journey, both physically and mentally.
  • castell5
    castell5 Posts: 234 Member
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    I have a gorgeous daughter as fit as any athlete I've ever seen. She is a dancer and zumba instructor as well as certified as a personal trainer. She also has a little "pooch" so to speak on her belly that no matter how "thin" she gets, or how fit she is, it is still there and seems to be her genetic makeup. I told her to consider it to be like a boob.. she can work out all she wants, get as fit as a fiddle! It wont disintegrate her boobs.. or her little pooch that she genetically has.. so if you are in the same boat and don't want to let go of your strive for perfection (physically) then you'll need a plastic surgeon which I strongly discourage! Say you do get that "perfect, Victoria secret model body" then what? Don't you think with that personality type, you will find something else to attempt perfection with? NO-One is perfect and there certainly isn't any MAN out there that is going to be perfect either. Your body is only one aspect of you. Work on your dreams, make them realistic and shoot for happy, not perfection physically. My favorite happy is traveling to somewhere warm, with palm trees, turquoise water and beaches! Letting someone else cook and make the beds! Good luck.
  • fraser112
    fraser112 Posts: 405
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    Stop looking to other people. Constantly wanting to improve is healthy. Constantly wanting to be better than someone shows you have an ego problem and using depression to feel sorry for yourself.

    The simple answer is get over yourself your flawed and so is everyone else.Just like being shy it is an unhealth form of self obsession. Every person you compare yourself to will get old and rot and end up as maggot food. Once you accept your body is all your ever gona get then you can improve.

    always love yourself but never feel you've gone far enough.
  • stephanie1133
    stephanie1133 Posts: 211
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    If this is interfering with your life, you should look into getting help. Getting to a certain weight will not make these thoughts go away, nor will it make you feel any differently about who you are. It sounds as if your self image and your body image are very intertwined. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you can find some peace with yourself! ((HUGS))
  • newyorklover91
    newyorklover91 Posts: 77 Member
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    Sweetheart, there are heaps of people out there that would kill to have a tiny little body like you. But in saying that, I agree with another poster that everyone is different and being perfect would be boring. You have to love yourself before anyone else loves you. And the other guy is right that 98% of us don't really care what you look like. We all have issues here and there with muffin top, saggy arms, big thighs, whatever it is, but that's just how we are. If you want to change something, you are the only person who can change it. If you're not happy with yourself then perhaps talking to someone like your mum or someone you trust - a friend or even a doctor - about these things may help. Even just to get it off your chest. You are a gorgeous girl and you shouldnt be worrying yourself over something so minor :-)

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