sick of the destructive cycle

NothingNeverChanges
NothingNeverChanges Posts: 10 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Let me start off by saying I've felt fat and nasty my entire life... I've been battling with bulimia since I was 14 years old, soon to be 27 and having had more weight fluctuations than Kristi Alley I've decided enough is enough! I've realized bulimia never really worked for me especially when I wasn't working out 2 hours a day 7 days a week, it actually did the opposite!! The pictures on my profile are from my darkest days (don't be deceived by the smile honestly I was lost and never truly happy!!!) I've been praying for willpower and patience and God has been EXTREMELY generous!!! I'm doing it right and feel amazing!! It was no accident that I found this APP... I've been in remission from bulimia for about 2 months now and I couldn't be happier!!! God certainly has been wonderful!

Replies

  • dschiefer
    dschiefer Posts: 5 Member
    Hi Samantha! Congratulations on your recovery! I've been there! I'm so tired of being so focused on losing weight and my outward appearance. I've always felt that somehow I am less worthy as a heavier person. I've lost most of my weight by starving, purging, and recently....the no carb thing. I agree that finding strength from God is the best way to go and I need to look towards strength from Him.

    What are your goals? As I'm writing, I'm thinking that I want to find my postives and feel good about myself despite the fact that I am not at my ideal weight. Whatever that is....... Make myself feel pretty and find confidence without being in an unrealistic and unhealthy eating pattern. I want to make small changes.....Try to stay on my 1400 calorie a day goal and impelent exercise that I enjoy into my routine. I can't be unrealistic anymore by limited my diet and working out everyday and doing things I hate.

    Two months is a huge accomplishment. How did you get there?

    Dawn
  • NothingNeverChanges
    NothingNeverChanges Posts: 10 Member
    Thanks Dawn! I'd have to say getting here was a very long process... Going back and forth with the "healthy" weight to obese weight is what got me thinking more long term... Always looking into the mirror with disgust no matter what size or weight I was at was so disturbing to me... I just started to pray... Constantly pray... When I was 15 I thought meth was the answer to all my troubles... I've been off meth for coming up on 10 years but the psychological effects from it continued for years. After becoming sober I decided to do a news story to try and help women who may have thought that drugs were the "miracle" they've been waiting for... Google Samantha Rizzo and its the first site that pops up... Why I've been praying for patience is because I've been expecting IMMEDIATE results my whole life... And that's just stupid. With TRUE change I needed to give all those insecurities to God... I couldn't have done any of this without Him! I promise you no matter what you weigh you're ALWAYS worthy of LOVE and GREATNESS! Please stay positive and keep in touch so we can support each other!
  • Maenaine
    Maenaine Posts: 6 Member
    I'm with Dawn. Congratulations on your recovery. You are a strong woman and you will be stronger in God. He will see you through and we are all here to help. You have my love and respect.
  • NothingNeverChanges
    NothingNeverChanges Posts: 10 Member
    I really appreciate it! The support is awesome!!! Thank you!
  • dschiefer
    dschiefer Posts: 5 Member
    That's awesome Samantha! I will definitely google that! I'm excited :)

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