Overcoming Tragedy

codiroxi
codiroxi Posts: 5
edited September 20 in Motivation and Support
So, I need some major help/inspiration. I had been a loyal MFP member since the beginning of school/Septemberish. I logged my meals and exercised every single day and was participating in my employee wellness program which consisted of Zumba two times a week for 45 minutes each, and a Body Burn class (cardio/strength training) two days a week for 45 minutes. I was very active and was doing my best to watch what I was eating. I lost about 10 pounds in a about a 3 ½ month span. Tragically, my younger brother passed away at the beginning of December. As with any tragedy, my world was turned upside down. I went days without eating, and days when I ate anything around, all to help deal with my pain. It has now been 4 months and I still can’t get back on track. I have been trying and trying to at least get back to eating normally, but with little success. I have kept the weight off, but that is due to the stress surrounding my tragedy. I want to get back to being healthy and keeping the weight off due to a healthy diet and active lifestyle, but I just don’t know how to start over, or if I even can. Please help!!!

Replies

  • aixela35
    aixela35 Posts: 13
    Not sure what your religion or spiritual back ground is but for me I put everything in God's hands. Maybe some grief counseling would help, maybe listening to some favorite songs while trying to walk at first. I am so sorry for the lost of your brother and know that nothing I can say is going to make that better, just know that God is with you and always is even when we sometimes do not think so. Trying not to sound preachy but my family has had some really battles over the years and my son has MD and only thru God have I made it. I also do counseling to help me vent out my frustrations and to get a opinion on how to maybe deal with some of the stuff better than I might. And sometimes we just have to go on and pick ourselves up and make us do what we know we need to do... Stay strong and know that time does heal but never can make you forget. Hope this helps at least some.
  • Murdog
    Murdog Posts: 70
    First, I am so sorry for your loss. I've lost both of my parents within the past four years; I still struggle.

    One thing you need to ask yourself is: 'what (or who) am I doing this for?' I know that looking great is a great motivator, but, your family and friends you still have are worth it, too. Your health is worth more than most anything you have, y'know?

    I have to think of my little boy and my wife every single day to get out on the road for a run. See, the older my son gets, the more he's asking me to play with him. I want to be there for him; to be his daddy and not tinker-out on him when he needs me the most.


    Please, don't quit. We all know what wanting to quit feels like. I want to reach for anything (food) that will get through the rough spots. See, that's what got me in the shape I'm in in the first place. I think about my mom and dad all the time in regard to training/working out. I think that they would want me to train hard at this; and be in the best health I could be. It would make them happy to know that I'm happy, and that my wife and son are, too.

    I'm not sure if any of this makes sense, or not. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
    I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. Grief is tough and it takes its toll on us.

    You obviously want to get back to where you were before. How about making small changes. Go for a walk each day or work out to an exercise video. Don't make it too challenging at first. You can work your way back into that.

    Instead of totally jumping into the whole healthy eating thing... again.. make small changes. A healthier beakfast...more veggies with dinner. Baby steps are the way to go.

    Be aware of what you are eating and how you are exercising. Be aware of how your body feels after you exercise or eat something healthy. There are 3 things that can help us battle stress and the loss of a loved one is major stress. The three things are eat right, exercise and sleep well. If you take care of the eating and the exercising, the sleeping will fall into place.

    Just be gentle with yourself. Maybe do something small for yourself like buy flowers or a manicure. Give yourself treats that aren't food. They will make you feel a little bit happier. I lost both my parents 4 years ago within 6 weeks of each other. I felt very fragile and weak. I wish I had known how to look after myself then.
  • cpatt
    cpatt Posts: 38 Member
    I am so sorry to hear about your little brother's passing! I just lost my husband in November and know the pain you are going through. Exercising, my children and my church are the only things that have kept me going. I would love to be here to support you in any way I can. I just sent you a friend invite.

    Cassie
  • MTGirl
    MTGirl Posts: 1,490 Member
    I'm so sorry for your loss! It sounds to me like you need some counseling or at least a support group. It's hard to get past a loss like that but with some compassion and someone to talk to who understands, it will get better!

    Taking some walks and treating yourself well will also be beneficial. {{hugs}}
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