negativity

jenlhugg
jenlhugg Posts: 141 Member
edited September 20 in Health and Weight Loss
I don't understand how people can be so negative about change. Especially family! Am I the only one with this problem. Two different family get togethers this weekend. My husbands family is so negative, asking both my husband and I if we think we had lost enough weight, why don't you want any ice cream and cake. Why can't they just be supportive. My family asked me how much weight I lost, then just kinda shood their head. My grandfather even told me "you may have lost some weight, but it makes you look a lot older." I just don't understand?!?!

Replies

  • asm2260
    asm2260 Posts: 81 Member
    Hi JEN,
    Its all about you and your wonderful Husband....Be proud...It is just one day of a family gathering....
    What Do You feel? Some people just do not realize how there words effect other people/ Be Happy...thats the bottom line, and Keep on going till you feel its right....
    Best Wishes!
    Amy
  • lilchino4af
    lilchino4af Posts: 1,292 Member
    They're probably jealous of your success and will power and might even subconsciencously freel threatened by you (if they're overweight). If they're not, then they're just ignorant to what you feel/want/need and you shouldn't worry about it. Just say that it's a lifestyle change you chose and don't care if they like it or not because they're not living it but that you would appreciate their support otherwise their silence. They'll leave you alone eventually.
  • aapye
    aapye Posts: 9
    I understand where you are coming from. I hear all the time, make sure you don't get addicted to exercise. Seriously????
  • EKarma
    EKarma Posts: 594 Member
    I do understand. My twin sis was doing started doing that. Finally, while we had all been drinking, it came out. I looked at her and told her that she should be the most supportive person on my team, but she was trying to bring me down. I told her that I wasn't going to stop, no matter what. She still takes lil stabs at me, but she has jumped on the wagon and wants to start getting healthy too. And now... Everyone is happy!

    My suggestion would be to ask, "Why would you say that?" I like to make people think about what they are saying and what the purpose is behind it. Misery LOVES company, so I always counter it with something positive.. Maybe you should've said, "Really, I look old? Well, I feel so much younger now. I have so much more energy. I feel great!" Always counter with something positive. It makes negative people shiver..

    Good luck with that. Keep going! you lookin good girl!:drinker:
  • jenlhugg
    jenlhugg Posts: 141 Member
    Addicted to exercise! Thanks, that one made me laugh.
  • running_mom
    running_mom Posts: 204 Member
    My family is the same way! They are always asking if I'm eating at all or starving myself. I think they just want to make sure I am being healthy about it. I think as long as you are eating right and exercising I wouldn't worry about.

    Be proud of yourself and husband. And keep it up!
  • binkyb00
    binkyb00 Posts: 81 Member
    You feel disrespected by your husbands family, but do they know that? I'm not trying to take sides, but maybe they also feel uncomfortable that whenever you guys have a get together you and your husband always pass on certain foods. Sometimes when not everyone is participating it can bring the energy down. I understand your commitment to stay on a healthy diet, but may I suggest something. You are free to ignore me, but sometimes when I know my portion is way too much for me is I share it with someone. That or I just take enough of lets say a cake or ice cream to just try a bit, so the people serving them to us doesn't feel bad that we don't want to eat the food.

    But I still do get your point. Saying negative words towards you and your husband is mean. It's just that sometimes you just got to compromise. As adults we have the very hardest time changing ourselves.
  • PecanTan
    PecanTan Posts: 47
    You know what don't waste your precious energy trying to figure out negativity because all that does it take your eyes off the prize and if you allow that then everyone else win whether it's friends or even family members. Family will be family continue to love them and you continue to love yourself and do what you know needs to be done in spite of their comments. You are a beautiful women and you will reach your goal stay positive don't ever let that horrible "negativity" get in your way of reaching your prize, because it always there trying to distract us and make us quit, don't you let it do it to you. You have all of my support and you just hang in there and don't worry about all the other talk that is not positive.:flowerforyou:
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