Negative people hindering your progress

ShadowMinx
ShadowMinx Posts: 38 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hey all,I'm Katrina your run of the mill college student trying to lose a little weight and eat healthy . I've never really had a problem with the way I look but certain family members and people who are/were close to me have made fun of me for how I look and have made rude comments about my weight (even though the doctor says I'm at a healthy weight). Their negativity has made me doubt myself and I have struggled with self confidence for years.Now I'm taking action and trying to do good things for myself,eating healthier being one of them but in my head I keep hearing these people mock me and when I was younger that lead to me either binge eating or starving myself because I was depressed.I don't want to go back to that unhappy place again.Any ideas on how to stay on track despite negative energy working against you?

Replies

  • fatjavotte
    fatjavotte Posts: 96 Member
    I feel for you. My parents kept telling me I was fat from when I was 8 (and I was a typical skinny, active 8-year-old). As a result, I still struggle with eating disorders nearly 25 years later. I have binged, I have starved myself, but I cannot get rid of the negativity, and I cannot make my anger go away.
    I hope you can make peace with yourself.
  • Koorii
    Koorii Posts: 65 Member
    The best way is to surround yourself with positive people. People who make you feel good, and support what you're doing. While that may not always be possible in "real life", you've got people here who will help you. Make friends with the people here. We're all in for the long haul, and could use others who make us feel like we've made the right decision, and to hold us accountable for those decisions.

    With that said, feel free to friend me!
  • EsthefanyViruez
    EsthefanyViruez Posts: 8
    My mom says: " You dont live from the people, what do they give you, nothing so dont listen to them". Well about this she meant when you hear gossip and stuff from you, in your case you shouldnt pay attention to their comments but its really good that you want to look heaalthy eating well and making some exercise help, i recomend you the tiffany workourts on youtube, its really important to eat healthier cause we will live longer and we will look even better with exercise, at least 30 min by day, it makes you feel better when you finish and when you exercise and eat healthy then you look prettier and you are happy, so dont be depressed and just hear the positive chearing, when you need help you can write me, btw sorry for my english :D
  • NewFrenchFemme
    NewFrenchFemme Posts: 36 Member
    Looking at your profile photo you are an attractive young lady. Maybe the negative people are just jealous, and try to put you down to make themselves feel better. Just pity them for being so unhappy with themselves.
  • lee91356
    lee91356 Posts: 330 Member
    My family is like that, even now, when I am 100+ pounds down they often question what I eat and tell me how I need to be careful not to eat too much or I will regain my weight. Its like "thanks this isnt hard enough with out your 2 cents." It pissed me off and upset me but I finally came to realize that the people who say those things to me are not emotional people and are not connected with their own feelings or others for that matter, and they just spout off what they are thinking, however, its not meant as an insult completely, its more like their weird way of showing their concern. Yes its unhealthy and totally crazy and I hate it, but I realized I can either give them the benefit of the doubt that they are my family and love and care about me and are showing concern about my health and well being (in their own twisted way) or I can let it bother me and react in a way that will only harm me and my weight loss goals.

    If possible it try to limit the amount of time you spend around these family members/ people and take everything they say with a grain of salt. I just smile and nod and avoid reacting and giving them a lecture about nutrition and proper weight loss.

    Good luck and try not to let them get to you!
  • RoseDarrett
    RoseDarrett Posts: 355 Member
    I have family members remind me of the times I was fat.When I lost weight they were"worried" about me.I've had 3 kids,my body has been big,pudgy,fit,toned defined and everything else in between.

    Yet people still have negative things to say.I'm a few pounds off my goal weight and certain people are critical,while some like to remind me of when I was fat(even busts pictures out,just in case I forgot)

    All I can say is,people will say whatever they like,irrespective of how you feel.I just keep saying kind positive things to myself,and I listen to my cheerleaders,not my haters.

    It works for me every time.After each baby,I work hard get fit and back into pre baby clothes and weight.
    The haters keep hating.
    I keep going.
    YOU CAN TOO :)
  • landgrimtham1977
    landgrimtham1977 Posts: 10
    i agree with Koorii & lee91356. Juz surround yourself with people of the right positive thinking and kick those negative type far far away. the faster you do that the faster you are gonna feel better about yourself.

    live your own life
  • alexveksler
    alexveksler Posts: 409 Member
    My mom says: " You dont live from the people, what do they give you, nothing so dont listen to them". Well about this she meant when you hear gossip and stuff from you, in your case you shouldnt pay attention to their comments but its really good that you want to look heaalthy eating well and making some exercise help, i recomend you the tiffany workourts on youtube, its really important to eat healthier cause we will live longer and we will look even better with exercise, at least 30 min by day, it makes you feel better when you finish and when you exercise and eat healthy then you look prettier and you are happy, so dont be depressed and just hear the positive chearing, when you need help you can write me, btw sorry for my english :D

    LIKE!!! I couldn't say better myself. And your English is perfect
  • selanrael
    selanrael Posts: 32
    I feel for all of you who are struggling with low or nonexistent self-esteem, 'cause I've totally been there. Still am. It's even harder to appreciate yourself when the people around you only give you negative feedback. Luckily I've noticed that folks here in MFP are really supportive, so maybe we can learn to love ourselves, too. And maybe lose some weight in the process ;)

    Let's do this thing!

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