Non Supportive Friends

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  • primal7
    primal7 Posts: 151 Member
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    Hang in there and add some new friends.
    You will formulate that group of friends that will help you be successful in your goals.
    You or anyone else can add me as a friend. :bigsmile:
  • Kissah
    Kissah Posts: 33 Member
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    Hmmmmmmm. I don't know, I comment to people without expecting anything in return and I get lots of comments every day. Sometimes weeks go by between someone commenting to me and vice versa due to folks being busy, but I try to comment to all my friends at least once a week. I think expecting folks to comment to you daily is a bit much though.

    Maybe spice up your feed a bit. Post interesting things. I tend to comment when folks seem...interactive? Like they don't just post exercise and food logs, but also little snippets of their day or a funny joke, or a quote, or a youtube clip to a song they exercise to. Stuff like that.

    I agree completely.... My day is always busy but I respond/comment here and there specially to things that catch my eye... I don't expect nothing in return I know life is hectic some only have time to log their workouts... Just give it your best for your own benefit...
  • HealthyGinny
    HealthyGinny Posts: 821 Member
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    Am I doing something wrong or do others have this problem?? Ever since I have joined MFP I have requested new friends for support and motivation and received many replies. I always leave comments encouraging or praising my friends menu or exercise of the day. In the beginning some of the new friends respond and then after a few days I get nothing !! No comments or support on my day. Isn't being a friend a two way street?? After a week or so with no comments from my so called friends I delete them. This has been going on even since I joined. Is it just me ???? I do not insult or leave cruel remarks either...I try to be as supportive as I would like in return, so I can not understand what I am doing wrong.... :(

    Any thoughts or ideas??????

    EXACTLY.

    I'm the kind of person who tries to comment on most of my friends' posts, I always reply to PM about tips and anything else, and I try to post some encouraging words now and then, and I accept every new friend request because who I am to say 'no' to sb who needs support? But when sb adds me (often without any message in the friend request) and I introduce myself and try to be supportive and I have absolutely NO feedback whatsoever, I'm like "what? but why did you add me in the first place??"

    The key is to do some cleaning in your friends' list on a regular basis and keep only people you 'know" (with whom you talk through posts and PM) and you'll then build a good network of great/supportive people :)

    Anyway, feel free to add me (if you're not going to ignore me afterwards :p).

    xx,
    Ginny, 24.
  • CKJ118
    CKJ118 Posts: 54
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    I agree with people above that it does have to do with personality. I like to make positive comments and support others, but you can't let it get you down if they are not always responding back. Good luck!
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,867 Member
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    I'm good about being responsive to my friends if they ask me something particular or need some specific advice about something, etc. I'm not good with the obligatory "good jobs" and "adda boy" stuff when people log their exercise or complete their diary or whatever. It says so on my profile though, so nobody should be taken by surprise by that. I personally don't get a lot out of that when people comment on my exercise burn or whatever. I usually just joke around if anything on my news feed...a friend sends me a PM, that's a different matter entirely.
  • svtrich
    svtrich Posts: 24
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    I'll be your friend:flowerforyou: we all need support
  • buttonfeet
    buttonfeet Posts: 50 Member
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    To play devil's advocate, it may be a matter of rushed schedules. Get to the next meeting, file the reports, head over to another section to put out fires, meet with the boss about a new project...oh yeah - respond on an MFP thread. It makes sense, really. I have no doubt that people join MFP with every intention of being active in the program. I also have no doubt that it's nothing personal when they don't respond.
    Having said that, I'll have to be sure to block time on my calendar to check in with MFP daily until hitting my goals.

    Cheers,
    Joe
  • wendybird5
    wendybird5 Posts: 577 Member
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    Hmmmmmmm. I don't know, I comment to people without expecting anything in return and I get lots of comments every day. Sometimes weeks go by between someone commenting to me and vice versa due to folks being busy, but I try to comment to all my friends at least once a week. I think expecting folks to comment to you daily is a bit much though.

    I agree. I try to comment when I can, but sometimes it can be weeks before I do because I'm so busy and barely have time to log on and mark my own progress, much less check on everyone else. Don't take it personally just because someone didn't give you a kudos. You don't know what they are going through or what their journey is and while they could mean to be supportive 24/7, they ultimately need to take care of their own needs first before they can give you what you want.

    Plus it's an online community and while it says Friends, I think of everyone as Acquaintances (well, except for my friends who have signed up on here) and I expect nothing from them. Instead I get pleasantly surprised when I get comments from them on my achievements and it spurs me to see how they are doing and comment back when I can.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    EXACTLY.

    I'm the kind of person who tries to comment on most of my friends' posts, I always reply to PM about tips and anything else, and I try to post some encouraging words now and then, and I accept every new friend request because who I am to say 'no' to sb who needs support? But when sb adds me (often without any message in the friend request) and I introduce myself and try to be supportive and I have absolutely NO feedback whatsoever, I'm like "what? but why did you add me in the first place??"

    The key is to do some cleaning in your friends' list on a regular basis and keep only people you 'know" (with whom you talk through posts and PM) and you'll then build a good network of great/supportive people :)

    Anyway, feel free to add me (if you're not going to ignore me afterwards :p).

    xx,
    Ginny, 24.

    This is what I do. And friends trimming isn't always because you don't like the person - sometimes you just find that the two of you aren't interacting as much. That's okay. I've let loose a few very wonderful people because it just turns out we don't have much in common - they are still great people and I know that if something goes horribly wrong and we need to talk to each other, we still can.

    But yeah, friend-making is a process, not a goal. You meet people, you develop relationships, you find out what kinds of friends work for you and what doesn't.
  • Joanie919
    Joanie919 Posts: 9
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    I wish I had friends who would support me. Don't know where to find them. You can friend me!
  • Lo39
    Lo39 Posts: 17
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    Feel free to add me :smile:

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