Confessions of a Carboholic....

I just can't help it, I love carbs. Well, not ALL carbs (I don't like rice or pasta), but my two favorite foods that takes extreme willpower to pass up are popcorn and toast (or pretty much any bread)....in that order. Potato chips/snack chips and crackers would vie for 3rd. I also think I may have an allergy to carbs which only makes my love of them all the worse. I can forgo the ice cream and even turn down chocolate. Sweets are not a real treat (unless I bake cookies then I consume them just because they are there.) I'd rather have cheese and crackers. The only thing is that I feel blah afterwards. It really affects me and it may be wheat products. I don't usually feel so bad after a potato based carb, but wheat ones seem to really have a slight physical effect on me. I am trying to take note of that and narrow it down and limiting my consumption may aid in that.

In the past, I had pretty good success with the Atkins diet. I lost 50-60 lbs. When I started eating carbs again, up went my weight. I then had 3 kids and didn't deprive myself of any carbs. I did try to limit them and still topped out at the end of my pregnancy with twins at 332 lbs.

In 2008 I had bariatric surgery (VSG) and got down to roughly 170. I was barely eating and was still quite strict on not eating carbs, although they were and are still easiest on my stomach.

So here I am at 221 lbs now and all pretty much due to my addiction to carbs. :( I know I can do this and lose weight. I know that in due time, I am not going to crave those things that give me such great eating pleasure. If only there was a way for them to not 'sneak' back into my mouth and onto my thighs, gut and butt again. (And yes, I blame them!! They can be so deceiving!)

Anyway - I am hoping to get my mind mentally wrapped around the evils of my addiction and lose this weight once and for all. *sigh* EVEN if it means I neglect my beloved Stir-Crazy popcorn popper. :( (The toaster...well, is just a toaster. It does what it is intended to when it feels like it. Not perfection every time like the popcorn popper, which is more loyal like a dog. The toaster is more like a cat.) Maybe by confessing and coming to grips with my addiction it will make it stick this time.

Thanks for listening. :)

Replies

  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
    When I'm alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the wall.

    I need carbs.
  • That is funny stuff right there!! :)
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Why do you try to deprive yourself of the foods you love. Just limit them. Tell yourself you can have X amount of <evil food> if you do X amount of <insert exercise here> if that helps. Eat all the stuff you know you should eat first and fill in the gaps with the stuff you love.

    Deprivation is often the key to failure, as you seem to have found out from your past attempts at weight loss. Moderation is often the better way. Count your calories. Eat carbs within those calorie limits. Exercise to "earn" more carb calories if you need or want to.

    If you want to lose and keep it off long term, you need to find a diet you can be happy with long term. And one that will keep you healthy. I'm not suggesting you eat chips and cake only. My point is that you can have chips and cake and control your weight. Just be sensible about it.
  • Sensibility doesn't work well. I really do think I have an allergy to wheat carbs. Even a little seems to go A LONG way on me - like for some odd reason I do not metabolize them. I think they just instantly turn into fat. There is also no nutritional value in what I like. Okay, popcorn may have fiber...but the carbs are way over it. AND....you don't understand!! LOL It isn't like I can have 'a cup' of popcorn. My popcorn popper does 6qts. I WILL EAT ALL 6 QUARTS with no problem. I don't like butter on it and only lightly salted. If it is there, I HAVE to eat it. So like an addict, I can't have any. I can pop it and not have any. But if I start, game on! Sad and silly. That is like only eating 1/2 a piece of toast. Nope, it will be the whole thing. Depending on the bread it may be 3 or 4 slices. That is a little easier to stop since I only have a 2 slice toaster.

    Carbs that I will allow are the ones that aren't almost all carbs. Like in fruits and veggies. Carb based things though, are going to have to be gone and I am going to have to be good with that until I figure out why they have such a bad effect on me at least. :)
  • bcmlam1001
    bcmlam1001 Posts: 118 Member
    To be honest, maybe you should get checked if you think you have a wheat intolerance. I have tries low carb, low sugar, low fat, and to be honest I have found it is way easier to eat whatever I want, just in moderation because that wasn't a lifestyle for me. I just find it hard to believe that someone can't eat in moderation and lose/maintain. I have a lot of allergies and I have cut out wheat bread, oatmeal, ect but just because it affects my allergies. I still eat it in products that have "wheat flour" but I just don't eat wheat bread and oatmeal. I have found that regardless of white or wheat poducts, it hasn't affected my weight. Good luck and I hope you can find what works for you....remember making excuses for our weight gain is only hurting ourselves...moderation is the key :flowerforyou:

    By the way, do you log your diary? I would love to take a look!
  • Some people I know have moved to a gluten free diet, might want to explore that option. Especially if it's breeads/crackers etc that cause you to feel poorly.
  • To be honest, maybe you should get checked if you think you have a wheat intolerance. I have tries low carb, low sugar, low fat, and to be honest I have found it is way easier to eat whatever I want, just in moderation because that wasn't a lifestyle for me. I just find it hard to believe that someone can't eat in moderation and lose/maintain. I have a lot of allergies and I have cut out wheat bread, oatmeal, ect but just because it affects my allergies. I still eat it in products that have "wheat flour" but I just don't eat wheat bread and oatmeal. I have found that regardless of white or wheat poducts, it hasn't affected my weight. Good luck and I hope you can find what works for you....remember making excuses for our weight gain is only hurting ourselves...moderation is the key :flowerforyou:

    By the way, do you log your diary? I would love to take a look!

    The other stuff is going to be in moderation. It HAS to be carbs. I had bariatric surgery and I can't eat a ton. If we go out to eat, my husband easily eats his meal and at least 1/2 if not more of mine. It is really hard to explain. My food log is on here. But this is without many carbs. We did go thru McDs and I had a Mc Double and removed the bottom. If I ate that, that is ALL I can eat. I never get fries. (they don't stay down - a gross concept, but they just don't). Dense protein - like the baked chicken tenders last night sit really really heavy. Unfortunately. :( And that is the stuff I need to focus on. I don't and can't live off protein drinks either. Things like crackers, chips, toast, bread (except tortilla shells) all go down and stay down and I don't suffer with. Fresh veggies are another one that is hard for my tummy too.

    I have a friend who is trying to get me to go glute free. There is also a wheat intolerance. I think avoiding all the wheat stuff I can may be better. I already feel like I have more energy and last night was the best sleep I have had in a while. (I have been suffering from neck, knee and hip pains at night - along with an injured right knee). I am thinking I may just also be inflamed from an allergy. I need to go back to the docs to see if he will investigate it further.

    Thanks for your reply!!
  • Some people I know have moved to a gluten free diet, might want to explore that option. Especially if it's breeads/crackers etc that cause you to feel poorly.
    I think you are right. Hoping I find a good doc in the area. Been looking and it is like no one is taking new patients. I may have to drive 1.5 hrs back to my old one. He loves to take blood samples! I think he'd also listen to my concerns about a wheat/glute allergy.
    :)
  • AMBlass
    AMBlass Posts: 161
    You should look into Paleo. They eliminate all grains, not just wheat (popcorn is corn, not wheat, so that wouldn't help you much!). You should get rid of your popcorn maker and stop buying popcorn if it's causing a problem. Some people can do moderation, other people have to be total abstainers. You might be an abstainer kind of gal. You have to find something that will let you stick with it. If having it around, or having little bits doesn't work for you then you might try not having any.

    Check out Robb Wolf or Mark Sisson (he has a similar but different program called Primal). I really think based on what you've said here that it's what you need. It will be HARD and you will hate it at first, but you do get used to it and when you see the difference it makes, you'll realize it's all worth it.
  • You should look into Paleo. They eliminate all grains, not just wheat (popcorn is corn, not wheat, so that wouldn't help you much!). You should get rid of your popcorn maker and stop buying popcorn if it's causing a problem. Some people can do moderation, other people have to be total abstainers. You might be an abstainer kind of gal. You have to find something that will let you stick with it. If having it around, or having little bits doesn't work for you then you might try not having any.

    Check out Robb Wolf or Mark Sisson (he has a similar but different program called Primal). I really think based on what you've said here that it's what you need. It will be HARD and you will hate it at first, but you do get used to it and when you see the difference it makes, you'll realize it's all worth it.

    Thanks! I will check them out. I have young children and want them to be able to enjoy what ever they want. I'd rather give up what I have to. If I find out that I am having wheat issues, then I may have to make a whole family meal change. I am lucky and don't have sugar or cholesterol issues. Just seem to not use carbs. :/
  • Nhizarms
    Nhizarms Posts: 26 Member
    Hi
    hey I finally just read you blog and the responses
    I am the kind of person who must abstain from the sweets. once i put them in my mouth i crave more and more and more.... its like i cant stop, its crazy...... i know all too well the signs of addiction and i have an addiction to sweets, i can do without the bread or pastas but omg let me put a piece of candy or a bite of cake in my mouth & it is a fight all day to not keep eating more.
    my advice.... "if you cant control it....keep it out of you house, purse, car, desk where ever you have it . and if you need to take an alternate route somewhere to avoid those places that sell what you crave,, then go the extra mile and take another street. for example yesterday I had to go to the store for something,, kroger was right there BUT i knew they had the maple donuts that i love so i went to walmart 2 miles away..... I know this may seem crazy for some of you, but you gotta do what ya gotta do to get to where you wanna be !!!!! tonight we went to dinner with a bunch of people and it was a buffet...... i loaded up on my salad then had a half a plate of green beans and a peice of ham and some chicken breast i did good, UNTIL i took a couple bites of my husbands desserts.... just a bite of this and a bite of that but now i want more.. an addiction is an addiction, it doesnt matter if its cigaretts, meth or food....
    as far as "diet" I have done every diet in the world,, lost and then gained all plus more of the weight back
    we cant live our life on a diet for ever.... we must chage our lifestyle simple as that..... simple concept but not an easy thing to do... I started my journey in june to get to a healthy weight and I have lost over 50 pounds, but its not been easy I have exercised 6 days a week, counted calories, protein and water till i wanna throw up, but it is working and it is a life style change , i will have to do this for the rest of my life im affraid. ... when i ate like i used to and didnt exercise much between thanksgiving and christmas..i gained 5 pounds and it was so hard to get back on track
    anyway im rambling and im goin to bed so have a great night and a wonderful tomorrow

    erica
  • morf13
    morf13 Posts: 151 Member
    My favorite carbs are Garlic cheese bread with extra cheese, and those damn Grands' muffins....I also like putting western omelettes with cheese on toast, and making it into a sandwhich. I Won't be eating them very often anymore, but when I do, I will savor them, enjoy them, and then get back to my diet
  • LexThaSongbyrd
    LexThaSongbyrd Posts: 63 Member
    Hello fellow VSG'er! :) I was sleeved in March 2012, down 92 lbs so far and still trying to be concious about my carb intake. I'm sure you already know that ALOT (not all) of the weight loss surgery community preaches under 40 carbs a day during the weight loss phase, but to each his/her own. At the end of the day, the light at your end of the tunnel is that you still have your handy dandy tool (the sleeve) to assist you at any point in your journey when you are ready.

    Although you are years out from surgery, you still won't ever be able to consume the same amounts of food you did pre-op. So I'm sure your intake/volume is not an issue that would affect you getting the lbs melting off again. However, you have to decide when you are ready to go "back to the basics." Us bariatric patients have been trained for life to rely on carb detoxing, going back to a protein shake or two a day, if not already doing so, measuring no more than 3-4 oz at each meal and undereating your sleeve (not eating to get the full feeling, but the comfortable I'm not hungry anymore feeling), which will also give us back some restriction that we may have loss over time due to stretching, if any.

    For most, alot of carbs (the ones that you said you like) are a slider food. It doesn't close your pyloric valve and sit in your stomach for a significant amount of time like dense protein does to keep you feeling full and satisfied. Therefore, we can eat endless amounts of it throughout the day, grazing and snacking and packing on the calories before we even realize the damage. For a VSG'er, that's our problem. We rely on our restriction, but we won't feel it as quick with carbs. I have also always been a carb lover. However, after surgery and over the past 10 months, I have been so focused on making goal and not wanting to sabotage future success, that I make myself love protein first over anything else. I make a concious decision and effort to not indulge in useless carb snacking that will not aid in my weight loss/maintenance. If I do, I will be out of control. I WILL eat a whole box of cheetos, cheez its, doritos, and eat bagels every morning for breakfast. I just can't do it. It's not worth it. I have found other things that I like to eat, and if I do crave any of those other things, I find an alternative or make an effort to satisfy that taste with a small amount and keep it moving, even if I have to throw the rest away.

    For the average health concious/fit minded person, they may not completely understand these thoughts, and that's cool. But because of the tool that we have, we have to do things a little differently sometimes. Although I'm not a size 18/20 anymore, as a size 6, I still don't feel skinny or normal. I don't think I ever will. We will always have to rely on the basics that jump started our weight loss after surgery. I wish you much success, grace and peace! :)
  • LexThaSongbyrd
    LexThaSongbyrd Posts: 63 Member
    I was just wondering...do you use the VSG support board on obesityhelp.com? I love that site...I'm on there as much as MFP and there is a lot of wisdom and encouragement you can get from the vets who are on there daily.
  • Hi everyone - I have been MIA - kids and myself are sick. Still not thinking too well.

    Carbs are hard and a big downfall to anyone. I love bread, but I can have it in the house. It is when I eat it I want more. I loaf of bread would last months if not over a year if it was just me. But it is a fast meal.

    Lex - I had horrible eating problems with my pouch since the surgery. I haven't had to have anything done, but protein and veggies just come back up (sorry - awful graphic) so I think part of my problem is that there is no win. Might as well eat and still be miserable. Carbs on top, however will help ease the uncomfortable yo-yo-ing.

    I did great until about 3 yrs ago. I started to eat a few more carbs, and was still losing pretty well. I used a lot of the supplements form my surgeon's office yet. It is expensive. I was content with a couple bites of protein. I felt like I had more energy and such. A lot of stuff has happened over the last 3 yrs, however, and I can't deny that carbs are my comfort food. I can steer clear of them, but like you said - so easy to nibble and not think about how much we are actually consuming. So double that up with dense protein giving me a bellyache. Just easier. (plus almost all easier foods are carbs and there was a time that easy was the way.)

    Anyway - those days are over. I still have to drop more carbs. And once I get well, I am thinking I will do the protein drinks again to 'restart' (that I read in the past about in OH) I haven't been on there in a while. :/ It doesn't take much to get the heebie jeebies from those shakes though. I lived off them too long. (Because of my nausea right after surgery and the intolerance to dense protein.)

    Thanks for sharing, everyone!!
    We can do this!!