Severely need support
comicbookmommy
Posts: 5
Hi there, I am very depressed today about my weight, and I was hoping for support and/or to let me know if I'm on the right track. I have a rather long background story, so big thank you for those who follow it all.
I am a 30 year old mom of 2. I successfully lost weight 3 times in my life (each loss 60+ pounds). The first time was losing all the weight in high school, then again two more times following each pregnancy. I have since gained 20 pounds back in the last year, putting me at 190 for my 5' 8" body, all because I have been trying to lose weight healthily.
For each weight loss, I had to do it unhealthily to succeed. I've had to eat 1200 or under calories, NO carbs, intense exercise (high cardio for an hour, 6 days a week, plus hour of weight training) to make it happen. I even had a two year period where I was bulimic to make me lose the last 10 pounds (which put me at my lowest weight). I've since recovered from bulimia for the last 6-7 years, and have no intention of returning, but I still suffer from the mentality of feeling worthless if I'm not skinny. I can keep those thoughts at bay with practice, but it still overwhelms me (like today)
Last year, I decided that I wanted to be HEALTHY and fit, not focus on being skinny. For me, for my kids. I upped my ideal goal weight from an unrealistic (for me) 145 to 165. I focused on being healthy, eating enough calories (not starving myself) and exercising (more moderately) I thought I had all the answers, but my weight slowly crept up. I tried tweaking my exercise, tweaking my diet, but nothing worked.
Now here I am at 190. I feel like a slug, I HATE how I look. I want badly to lose the weight, and so my old bad habits of undereating and over exercising keep trying to sneak back in. I won't let it, but it's very hard when I feel like I put in so much effort to do it right, and nothing works.
So 2 weeks ago I recalculated everything (again) and am going to stick with this routine for a few months to see how I do. I've lowered my carbohydrate levels. I had incorporated them back (healthy types, at healthy levels) in the last year or so, and I feel that may have led to my weight gain. Also, both sides of the family has diabetes (I don't) and I've always felt I do not tolerate carbs well. I also feel good on a lowered carb diet, so that's my thinking to try it again (but not so extreme as before)
In the last two weeks doing this routine, I FEEL better, but I want to lose weight as well, of which I notice no change. I was hoping all of you pros can take a look at my routine to let me know if I'm more or less on track for weight loss (taking into account that I may still have a damaged metabolism). I am okay with slow and steady, but for my mental health, seeing ANY progress over time is needed to keep me going, of which I've seen none over the last year.
(My current routine, started 2 weeks ago. Prior to this, moderate healthy carbs were in place)
STATS: Female, 30, 190 pounds. 5' 8". Size 14-16 I have pretty good muscle tone as pard of that weight, but too much fat by far as well.
MEDICAL ISSUES: Family history of Diabetes, possible adrenal/cortisol problems from high stress life/career and past diet & exercise behavior.
JOB: Artwork/Work at Home (so sitting for 6 hours a day), but I also have a toddler who is very active that I chase a bunch.
EXERCISE: gym 5-6 times a week. Daily, 40-60 minute LOW intensity cardio on elliptical. at 130 BPM. 20-40 minutes weight training.
DIET: Lower carbohydrates, as clean an healthy as I can make it. I try to keep everything around 1600 calories, as that's my BMR and I hear I'm not supposed to go under that.
Sample Diet
Meal 1 (400 cals): Shake prior to workout
1/2 cup lowfat unsweetened coconut milk
1/2 cup frozen cranberries
3/4 cup spinach
1 scoop Promasil protein power
2TBS raw almond Butter
Meal 2 (approx 300 cals) after workout
Piece of fish
asparagus cooked in 1/2 TBS canola oil
1 TBS lowfat canola mayo (about 3.5 grams fat)
sprinkle of blue cheese on asparagus
Snack (approx 150 cals)
lowfat cheese stick
1 TBS Peanut butter
Meal 3 (approx 400 cals)
1 serving 99% ground turkey breast
1- 1 1/2 cup various cooked veggies (onion, bell pepper, mushrooms)
1 TBS canola oil to cook veggies in
1/4 cup sauce (like marinara)
sprinkle of lowfat cheese on top
Meal 4 (approx 300 cals, 4 hours before bed)
2 celery stalks
1/2 can chunk wild salmon
2 TBS lowfat canola mayo
1 OZ lowfat cabot chedder cheese
Night snack Approx 50 cals ( if I get hungry)
Lowfat cheesestick
I usually have one sucralose sweetened rootbeer in the evening as my "treat" for doing well all day. Also I have a tiny cup of coffee in the morning, black.
How does everything look? I want to lose the weight healthily BADLY, and am very dedicated, but I want to be sure I'm on the right track this time first. It's so hard for me to trust eating higher than 1200 cals, so any encouragement is welcome.
Thanks to all who made it through my post!
And thanks for the support
I am a 30 year old mom of 2. I successfully lost weight 3 times in my life (each loss 60+ pounds). The first time was losing all the weight in high school, then again two more times following each pregnancy. I have since gained 20 pounds back in the last year, putting me at 190 for my 5' 8" body, all because I have been trying to lose weight healthily.
For each weight loss, I had to do it unhealthily to succeed. I've had to eat 1200 or under calories, NO carbs, intense exercise (high cardio for an hour, 6 days a week, plus hour of weight training) to make it happen. I even had a two year period where I was bulimic to make me lose the last 10 pounds (which put me at my lowest weight). I've since recovered from bulimia for the last 6-7 years, and have no intention of returning, but I still suffer from the mentality of feeling worthless if I'm not skinny. I can keep those thoughts at bay with practice, but it still overwhelms me (like today)
Last year, I decided that I wanted to be HEALTHY and fit, not focus on being skinny. For me, for my kids. I upped my ideal goal weight from an unrealistic (for me) 145 to 165. I focused on being healthy, eating enough calories (not starving myself) and exercising (more moderately) I thought I had all the answers, but my weight slowly crept up. I tried tweaking my exercise, tweaking my diet, but nothing worked.
Now here I am at 190. I feel like a slug, I HATE how I look. I want badly to lose the weight, and so my old bad habits of undereating and over exercising keep trying to sneak back in. I won't let it, but it's very hard when I feel like I put in so much effort to do it right, and nothing works.
So 2 weeks ago I recalculated everything (again) and am going to stick with this routine for a few months to see how I do. I've lowered my carbohydrate levels. I had incorporated them back (healthy types, at healthy levels) in the last year or so, and I feel that may have led to my weight gain. Also, both sides of the family has diabetes (I don't) and I've always felt I do not tolerate carbs well. I also feel good on a lowered carb diet, so that's my thinking to try it again (but not so extreme as before)
In the last two weeks doing this routine, I FEEL better, but I want to lose weight as well, of which I notice no change. I was hoping all of you pros can take a look at my routine to let me know if I'm more or less on track for weight loss (taking into account that I may still have a damaged metabolism). I am okay with slow and steady, but for my mental health, seeing ANY progress over time is needed to keep me going, of which I've seen none over the last year.
(My current routine, started 2 weeks ago. Prior to this, moderate healthy carbs were in place)
STATS: Female, 30, 190 pounds. 5' 8". Size 14-16 I have pretty good muscle tone as pard of that weight, but too much fat by far as well.
MEDICAL ISSUES: Family history of Diabetes, possible adrenal/cortisol problems from high stress life/career and past diet & exercise behavior.
JOB: Artwork/Work at Home (so sitting for 6 hours a day), but I also have a toddler who is very active that I chase a bunch.
EXERCISE: gym 5-6 times a week. Daily, 40-60 minute LOW intensity cardio on elliptical. at 130 BPM. 20-40 minutes weight training.
DIET: Lower carbohydrates, as clean an healthy as I can make it. I try to keep everything around 1600 calories, as that's my BMR and I hear I'm not supposed to go under that.
Sample Diet
Meal 1 (400 cals): Shake prior to workout
1/2 cup lowfat unsweetened coconut milk
1/2 cup frozen cranberries
3/4 cup spinach
1 scoop Promasil protein power
2TBS raw almond Butter
Meal 2 (approx 300 cals) after workout
Piece of fish
asparagus cooked in 1/2 TBS canola oil
1 TBS lowfat canola mayo (about 3.5 grams fat)
sprinkle of blue cheese on asparagus
Snack (approx 150 cals)
lowfat cheese stick
1 TBS Peanut butter
Meal 3 (approx 400 cals)
1 serving 99% ground turkey breast
1- 1 1/2 cup various cooked veggies (onion, bell pepper, mushrooms)
1 TBS canola oil to cook veggies in
1/4 cup sauce (like marinara)
sprinkle of lowfat cheese on top
Meal 4 (approx 300 cals, 4 hours before bed)
2 celery stalks
1/2 can chunk wild salmon
2 TBS lowfat canola mayo
1 OZ lowfat cabot chedder cheese
Night snack Approx 50 cals ( if I get hungry)
Lowfat cheesestick
I usually have one sucralose sweetened rootbeer in the evening as my "treat" for doing well all day. Also I have a tiny cup of coffee in the morning, black.
How does everything look? I want to lose the weight healthily BADLY, and am very dedicated, but I want to be sure I'm on the right track this time first. It's so hard for me to trust eating higher than 1200 cals, so any encouragement is welcome.
Thanks to all who made it through my post!
And thanks for the support 0
Replies
-
The only thing I can think of is that you aren't getting enough calories for the workout regimen you are doing. If you aren't eating back the majority of the calories you've burned exercising then that is giving you a much larger calorie deficit. You're body needs fuel to be active.0
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If you use more calories than you take in, you will lose weight, maybe not every week, and some weeks you may gain, but you will lose.
If your exercise is a new routine, you could be retaining water, and dietary changes can take more than two weeks for your body to adjust and show a loss. Did you measure yourself two weeks ago? You may show loss of inches before you show a loss on the scale.
If you are feeling better you are on the right track for healthy, focus on that for at least a month, then look closer at losing.
As to your menu, I personally would need some whole grains and more dairy to feel satisfied. You do seem to have enough protein and vegetables. You may not be getting enough calcium, Vitamin D, and the vitamins you'd get from grains (B Vitamins, maybe).0 -
One thing you identified that really struck me was your feelings of depression. As you've already experienced eating disorders, do you have a counsellor of some type to help you through your emotions while you do this? I found this to be very important as mental health is just as important as physical health, and as I have anxiety, depression and personality disorders, for me, it's critical.
The other thing to watch is that your nutrient levels are maintained. One that I have particular issues with is sodium. I have made a lot of changes to reduce my sodium levels as I have bad reactions which are similar to allergies and addictions.
I don't use a lot of artificial sweetener anymore, and for soda I got a SodaStream which significantly reduces my sodium intake.
You also need to be sure you are getting enough calories.
I recently started to follow Bob Harper's Skinny rules plan. The rules are common sense, and the food is real food and easy to cook and yummy. It's about 1200 calories, but both me (308 lbs) and my daughter (343 lbs) are both full and satisfied with the portion sizes. The biggest change for us is no carbs after lunch and go to bed a little bit hungry. That's not what we're used to but so far we're doing ok. I know that within 3 days, my jeans went from snug to falling off, so there's been something happening....even water weight loss is good for me though because it means my sodium is levelling off.
Good luck and I hope you figure out what works for you.0 -
I'm a big believer in cardio and weight training, so good for you for doing both. Have you thought of running instead of the eliptical? I love the eliptcal, but it does not burn many calories. Running burns a ton of calories, gives you a great burn in a short time frame, and it helps burn off leg and hip fat. I started running (albeit slowly) at 390 pounds and dropped nearly 130 pounds. I know alot of people are afraid of running, but if I can run a marathon weighting over 300 pounds, almost anyone can run. Good Luck!0
-
The Harris-Benedict Equation says that you should need 1965 calories a day to maintain 190 lbs. and quick math says you are consuming 1600 cals. So, you have it right!
These are my suggestions:
- Keep an eye on your excercise calories. You may have to eat back some of them to keep yourself above the 1200 calorie a day threshhold.
- Given the fact that you are doing some strength training, keep an eye on your protein. You may want to target closer to 120 grams a day.
- Try low-fat cottage cheese for that late night snack. It's only a few more calories than your cheese stick and the protein is great.
- You may also want to consider adding a multi-vitamin and an Omega-3 supplement.
You're doing it right! It won't happen over night but, IT WILL HAPPEN!0 -
The only thing I can think of is that you aren't getting enough calories for the workout regimen you are doing. If you aren't eating back the majority of the calories you've burned exercising then that is giving you a much larger calorie deficit. You're body needs fuel to be active.
Thank you for the reply!
I was wondering about that as well, I really do want to do this right. But then I see information like in one of the reply posts (that say I only need 1900 to MAINTAIN) so that makes me think I'm right on, or maybe even too high. SO CONFUSED! I really appreciate your input!If you use more calories than you take in, you will lose weight, maybe not every week, and some weeks you may gain, but you will lose.
If your exercise is a new routine, you could be retaining water, and dietary changes can take more than two weeks for your body to adjust and show a loss. Did you measure yourself two weeks ago? You may show loss of inches before you show a loss on the scale.
If you are feeling better you are on the right track for healthy, focus on that for at least a month, then look closer at losing.
As to your menu, I personally would need some whole grains and more dairy to feel satisfied. You do seem to have enough protein and vegetables. You may not be getting enough calcium, Vitamin D, and the vitamins you'd get from grains (B Vitamins, maybe).
Thank you for your information That's my main problem, that by the information and calculations everywhere I SHOULD have lost weight last year, at least slowly and steadily, but I did nothing but gain in the last year, and the jury is still out how my new routine will do. I am worried that I injured my metabolism too much over the years, so my body is TOO efficient at calories usage, so I may need a lower number after all to lose weight. If that were the case, should I lower the calories, or keep them the same to try and heal my metabolism, risking more weight gain? Hope that made sense! It's so difficult!
And thanks for the information on vitamins, I will for sure look into each of those recommended!One thing you identified that really struck me was your feelings of depression. As you've already experienced eating disorders, do you have a counsellor of some type to help you through your emotions while you do this? I found this to be very important as mental health is just as important as physical health, and as I have anxiety, depression and personality disorders, for me, it's critical.
The other thing to watch is that your nutrient levels are maintained. One that I have particular issues with is sodium. I have made a lot of changes to reduce my sodium levels as I have bad reactions which are similar to allergies and addictions.
I don't use a lot of artificial sweetener anymore, and for soda I got a SodaStream which significantly reduces my sodium intake.
You also need to be sure you are getting enough calories.
I recently started to follow Bob Harper's Skinny rules plan. The rules are common sense, and the food is real food and easy to cook and yummy. It's about 1200 calories, but both me (308 lbs) and my daughter (343 lbs) are both full and satisfied with the portion sizes. The biggest change for us is no carbs after lunch and go to bed a little bit hungry. That's not what we're used to but so far we're doing ok. I know that within 3 days, my jeans went from snug to falling off, so there's been something happening....even water weight loss is good for me though because it means my sodium is levelling off.
Good luck and I hope you figure out what works for you.
Thank you for the response!
Oh definitely I suffer from anxiety, depression, and I've been through the wringer in my 30 years in terms of stressful situations. And no I don't have access to counseling or anything like that. Over the last 5 years I've been working on being happier and healthier, and trying to change my own perception of body image. I'm still in the process, and it's slow, but I like to say I'm getting better. However today I had a terrible time realizing how much weight I gained in this last year, and how hard I tried that entire time to lose it healthily. It just feels like wasted time and effort, and I want to make sure I get it right this time.
I agree with you on sodium! And congratulations on having such a successful time with your diet! That's wonderful!
Thank you again!I'm a big believer in cardio and weight training, so good for you for doing both. Have you thought of running instead of the eliptical? I love the eliptcal, but it does not burn many calories. Running burns a ton of calories, gives you a great burn in a short time frame, and it helps burn off leg and hip fat. I started running (albeit slowly) at 390 pounds and dropped nearly 130 pounds. I know alot of people are afraid of running, but if I can run a marathon weighting over 300 pounds, almost anyone can run. Good Luck!
Hello! And thank you! Last year it was all about running and doing high impact cardio like Insanity. Insanity was awesome, my cardiovascular improved tremendously, and I gained lots of muscle, BUT My fat didn't burn off, in fact I gained about 8 pounds in 3 months. I ate slightly under what they prescribe on their program (I ate 1900, they wanted 2200) and still I gained. When I wasn't doing Insanity, I ran 3-5 miles 4-5 days a week.
I've been worried I may have a high cortisol/adrenal fatigue problem (got all the symptoms) and they suggest lower impact exercises to not trigger cortisol (thereby stopping fat loss) during exercise. That's why I'm giving that a go to see if maybe I was overtraining. But, I definitely will hit that treadmill again when I can! I loved running!
And CONGRATS on your accomplishments! That's so fantastic!!
I'd love to be able to run a marathon!
Thanks again for your post!0 -
The Harris-Benedict Equation says that you should need 1965 calories a day to maintain 190 lbs. and quick math says you are consuming 1600 cals. So, you have it right!
These are my suggestions:
- Keep an eye on your excercise calories. You may have to eat back some of them to keep yourself above the 1200 calorie a day threshhold.
- Given the fact that you are doing some strength training, keep an eye on your protein. You may want to target closer to 120 grams a day.
- Try low-fat cottage cheese for that late night snack. It's only a few more calories than your cheese stick and the protein is great.
- You may also want to consider adding a multi-vitamin and an Omega-3 supplement.
You're doing it right! It won't happen over night but, IT WILL HAPPEN!
Thank you so much for checking my calories needs and the information! I will definitely keep an eye on protein and I love cottage cheese, so that'll be an easy addition for me
I take a multi, omega 3 already, but unsure if I have the best kind (I hear they vary on efficiency) Can you recommend one?
Thank you so much! 0
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