When bad days outweigh good days

Well, I'm somewhat in the same boat. My husband likes to eat out and go out during the weekends. So, it is harder to eat healthy. My big mistake was not making sure that my blood sugar stayed up today. I ate my regular breakfast, which is healthy. Then, we left to go on an adventure, and I was hungry at 1. He wasn't, so we didn't eat until 4:30/5:00. I was ravenous by then. We went to a Mexican restaurant, and I slaughtered half of the container of chips and salsa and then ate almost my whole plate of food. Ugh. I am still full at 4 hours later, and I'm sluggish because I ate so much. I'd be curious what other people do for the weekends.

Hi, it's a big challenge to stay within your calorie goal when you eat socially, and can't just leave the table when you have eaten your allotment of calories. My family hosts every week-end, and it is my big challenge too. I try to fill my plate with salads, raw vegetable sticks, cut up fruit and such... hoping not to end up with an extra slice of dessert/chicken or whatnot. I end up eating more pretty much every week-end, but I try to walk it off with walks in the evening.

For me it comes down to discipline and planning. We all have moments when we have bad days, but you need to keep them limited or planned cheat days. When I have lots of social events, I will do like others here suggested and plan it so I eat a healthy meal before hand and keep the garbage to a minimum. Eating and living a healthy is a lifestyle choice that you either make or you dont. I plan all my meals every day and I know what I am eating the day before. I know that sounds boring or a little OCD, but its me and its how I love to live my life. I hope you can swing the pendulum the other direction and get your bad days to a much more smaller level than the good ones. Good luck!

1200 per day for the highest deficit to lose 1kg / 2lbs per week.

Also follow a version of paleo. so no bread/rice for me mainly (which I love)

No snacks or desserts during the week..so do crave it eventually.

Can not do moderation, so I dont have foods I like (chocolates, ice cream) during the week can go overboard so I prefer to avoid. and it does work for the most part.

Your deficit is too high and your diet is too restrictive. If you find some balance, a diet you can live with long term, you can get off the rollercoaster of restriction and overeating permanently. If you have trigger foods that you have to eliminate, and cannot handle moderation with those choices, that's understandable, but it sounds like you are eliminating everything you like out of fear and then wondering why you can't keep focus when you loosen the reigns. You don't have to include trigger foods to be able to do moderation, but what you are doing isn't working, and you also seem unwilling to change it. Good luck to you.

Set your goal at a more realistic 1lb a week and try not to be so restrictive.

I'm the reverse - I manage to eat fine on the weekends (usually) and find it harder during the week. My overall daily calorie goal is 2000 a day, so 14,000 a week. I allow myself 1,400 on weekend days and 2,200 on weekdays. You could do a reverse and reduce Mon-Thu by 200 calories each and up Fri-Sun by 265ish.

EDIT: nevermind, just read you're only eating 1,200 a day.

1200 per day for the highest deficit to lose 1kg / 2lbs per week.

Also follow a version of paleo. so no bread/rice for me mainly (which I love)

No snacks or desserts during the week..so do crave it eventually.

Can not do moderation, so I dont have foods I like (chocolates, ice cream) during the week can go overboard so I prefer to avoid. and it does work for the most part.

Your deficit is too high and your diet is too restrictive. If you find some balance, a diet you can live with long term, you can get off the rollercoaster of restriction and overeating permanently. If you have trigger foods that you have to eliminate, and cannot handle moderation with those choices, that's understandable, but it sounds like you are eliminating everything you like out of fear and then wondering why you can't keep focus when you loosen the reigns. You don't have to include trigger foods to be able to do moderation, but what you are doing isn't working, and you also seem unwilling to change it. Good luck to you.

Great advice!!

I agree with much of what has been stated by others. This is about sustainability. If you can't sustain through a weekend what is your game plan for keeping it off? Your diet is much too restrictive and therefore you essentially binge on weekends. If you want to be successful you need to:
1. Find a plan that works for you. Clearly the overly restrictive diet does not.
2. Use discipline to stay on track. You shouldn't have to totally go AWOL every weekend.
3. Exercise. It gives you more wiggle room with calories among countless other benefits.

If you have more bad days than good, my guess is that you really aren't committed to losing weight. Review your reasons for wanting to lose weight in the first place. Do you want it bad enough to work for it? It doesn't come easy.

If I know I am going to go out and eat and drink a lot in the evening I try to work out as much as I can that day so I have more calories to play with so I don't go over. I also try to eat lightly for the rest of the day.

If I am going out for dinner I look at the menu online and choose what I am going to eat beforehand and pre-log the calories which stops me from choosing a massively calorific meal on impulse.

Agree with those who say you're being too restrictive, so most of this is a reaction. No one strategy is going to work for all events. It's smart of you to look for a set of strategies you can use.

Find a few sweets or desserts you can eat without triggering more eating. One way to do this is to find sweets that fit. I like fruit. So a fruit smoothie is a treat, and it also fits into my healthy eating. Some sweet foods have little or no calories -- for instance, some fruit teas or licorice tea (no sweetener added or needed).

Denying yourself is much harder that treating yourself with something else you can enjoy. So find yummy recipes that fit into your plan. Spices can decrease your appetite. Some like cinnamon have been found to have additional healthy effects, such as helping with sugar levels. It's much easier to replace a bad habit with a good one than to simply "stop" the bad habit.

Other strategies...

Before eating out, have a plan. Look up the foods that restaurant has. What are some of the better choices you can make? Are you eating out for all your meals on the weekend? Or could you eat a lower cal breakfast and lunch, saving up some "calorie budget" for dinner out (but be careful of "starving" yourself and being too hungry when you go out, it's a balance)? Eat something that fills you up first -- salad? As someone pointed out in another thread she can make some of her favorites at home (she mentioned fettuccine alfredo) for hundreds of calories less than the restaurant; so she only eats it when she makes it, and eats other things in restaurants. A salad, steak and side vegetables are pretty filling and fit in most non-vegetarian plans. Restaurants will also do substitutions or just leave things off -- yesterday I asked them to leave off the hash browns and the waitress offered some sliced tomatoes instead. Do not go to buffets, or if the restaurant has one, ask to order off the menu anyway. Ask for a box at the beginning of a meal and put away anything that's more than you want to eat. Some people have to throw out the box, but that's better than over eating.

At parties, do not sit next to the food. Enjoy the food, but do not take seconds. Portion control is important. At a party, take small servings. And remember that there's no rule that you have to taste everything (unless you're a paid taster, in which case you may need to consider changing jobs). If it's appropriate, offer to bring a dish. This works well for a pot luck or family get-together. Bring something you can enjoy, and it will be good for others too. (I took a couple of kinds of fruit to a pot luck event just last night, and others loved that choice as well. Someone else brought a vegetable tray. So there was a bunch of good healthy food that honestly tasted better than some of the chips and pretzels, and I could still eat a couple of the gum drops someone else brought. (I like gum drops, but keeping them in my house is not a good idea, so this is a good way for me to enjoy just a few.)

Don't eat food you don't like. If the food at a party or restaurant isn't good, leave it. You can eat something better later. Why waste your "calorie budget" on something you don't enjoy? It's like spending your money and time to go vacation in a place you hate.

As these are social events, focus on the people. Have you had a chance to talk to all the people you wanted to see? Is there a dance floor? Are there other fun activities that will take you away from the food or keep your hands busy with something else? And if there's nothing but a bunch of people sitting around eating, could you maybe make some suggestions about another fun way to spend an evening? Bowling? Ice skating? (See how I snuck in some exercise there?) Board game? Picnic with a bit of walking?

Despite what some people say, there really are no "cheat" days, so don't think of weekends that way. Who do you think you're cheating? Your body knows what you ate. It's ok to plan to occasionally eat a bit more or something special. And we all make food mistakes sometimes. As you correctly recognize that's ok, but we need to reduce the "bad" days and increase the "good" ones.

With practice you'll find the strategies that work for you and get better at using a variety of techniques. Good luck!

Edited to correct typo and for clarification.

What's your deficit set at during the week? What's your general eating plan?

I suspect it's too restrictive to be sustainable, causing you to go overboard when you 'relax'.

This. Also, you really should not be under your calorie goal. Your calorie goal is already at a deficit you should be meeting your goal.

The dinners out and parties will always be there, desserts will also always be there. You need to work around them and figure out how to forgive yourself for indulging, because it's going to, and it should, happen again. Try giving yourself a break, try letting yourself know that it's OK to have those things. When I deprive myself of something I only end up wanting it more and OVERindulging when I finally do get my taste buds on those foods! No more guilt, eat anything you want within limits, fully and completely enjoy it, log it and move on!

Life is too short to feel guilty over the food you ate!