Overweight...yeah me!

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bennettv
bennettv Posts: 152 Member
Lots of little victories...

Yesterday I officially got down to being "overweight". No more obese for me!

I am one pound away from hitting the 30 lb lost mark. (I am afraid to update my weight in case it doesn't stick.)

We had our last official weigh in for my work Biggest Loser competition. In the 13 weeks of the competition I lost 19.4 lbs and 22.5 inches. I went down 3.2% in body fat.

I'm solidly in a size 14. Although, today I'm wearing a pair of size 12 Levi's that I can't believe I fit into!

I am in week 5 of the Couch to 5K program and feeling, for the first time in 12 years, like a runner. I'm confident I'll finish the 5K I am doing on June 6.

And one confession...

I'm really unmotivated to log my food. I did it consistently for something like 75 days, but I'm just kinda over it. I know I'm eating not quite as well as when I log, but I am still losing. Part of me feels like this is just my new life and I really do know what to do. Part of me is aftraid of being too successful -- the whole old mental script that I don't deserve it. Does anyone else out there feel that way?

Thanks to MFP. I'm not just remaking my body, I'm remaking my life.

Replies

  • Chenoachem
    Chenoachem Posts: 1,758 Member
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    Great job on your weight loss. Sometimes we have to think about our motivations and try not to sabatage ourselves. Of course you deserve to do this for yourself. My motivation has been to be able to wear and do things I want to without the concern if I will make it. If you can do this, you can do anything. :)
  • beccasetsfire
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    Congratulations! Great Job!
  • DoctorLaura
    DoctorLaura Posts: 32 Member
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    Hey Way to Go!!!

    You're doing great and you DO deserve it!

    I remember going from obese to overweight and it truly does feel great; something that I'm sure many people don't understand but I definitely do. (I went from 217 to 155 on thebiggestloserclub.com before joining MFP)

    As for the logging, I was exactly the same way--religious, and borderline fanatical in fact, about logging and making sure the numbers were accurate. Over time, I was less adamant about it but continued to lose weight. One thing I have noticed is that even when I didn't log for a few months I still lost, but at a MUCH slower pace.

    Personally, I think logging is a great idea because it keeps you accountable when you come on line and people can see how you're doing. Even more importantly to me however, is that it makes you more mindful of what you're eating. Even if nobody else can view your log or checks up on your progress, just thinking about what you're eating can help you make the right choices. I look at something before I eat it and think "how am I going to log this later" if it's too complicated (i.e.: it's filled with tons of unidentifiable ingredients) it probably isn't good for me and isn't fuelling my body the way I want it to. I have learned that food that is easily identifiable is usually the best for keeping me feeling good--and you need lots of energy for all that running you're doing!

    I know what it feels like to not feel worth it--but I assure you, YOU ARE WORTH IT. Think about all the people that depend on you in a day: coworkers, friends, family members etc. If you aren't taking care of you, you won't be able to help anyone else. I am a giver and I sometimes give and give until there's nothing left for me. I also am an eternal people pleaser and crave external validation. I'm trying to realize that in order to give I have to take care of myself FIRST; if I'm falling apart I'm no good to anyone else--and validation wise, unless I believe in myself, all the praise in the world will just fall on deaf ears. I have to be proud of myself and love myself first.

    But it's all a life long journey--I thought the finish line would be my goal weight, but it wasn't--hitting my first goal was simply that, one important goal that will help me stay healthy enough to reach all the other ones I have for my life.

    KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!!!! :)
  • heather62803
    heather62803 Posts: 266 Member
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    Yeah!!!! Congrats on the accomplishment. As far as the logging goes - maybe take a little break and see how you do, you know the option is here when you feel you need to come back. I can't wait to join you in that category - I still have a few more to lose though! Great Job :happy:
  • IanRS
    IanRS Posts: 68 Member
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    Excellent work - I look forward to the day that I am as successful as you are.

    If you are still losing, no problem on the logging if you are managing things without, no need to beat yourself up over it - it is supposed to help you not control you - keep an eye on your weight though and perhaps you could try logging again after a few weeks :-)
  • bennettv
    bennettv Posts: 152 Member
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    Thanks for the nice remarks.

    DoctorLaura -- Pep talk is always welcome, thanks for taking the time. It's good to hear how others go through their process.

    One of my issues is that I was sexually assulted when I was younger. As I get thinner I'm getting more attention. The weight was really "safe" and not having it is making me feel more vulnerable to unwanted attention. I had a few weird moments in the last few weeks and I'm thinking that's were the negative stuff is coming from. I'll get through it, I just have to learn how to be the new me.
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