BMR and TDEE

BMR is the number of calories your body needs to stay alive.

TDEE is the total number burned in a day (BMR+ activity)

I make it a point to not net below my BMR.

Go here http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12 for help determining the best goal for you.

I work a desk job all day, but go to the gym or do an class etc four days a week about.
I feel like 1600 is good, sometimes I dont even eat that much...dont mean to. I should prob eat at least 1500.
I see people on "diets" eating like 1200 and I dont think that is healthy.

I generally sit on my butt most of the day aside from my 1 hour workout 6 days per week. I'm 5'4", 36 yo, and 130 pounds. I aim for 2,000 calories per day and I am still losing body fat. You are absolutely correct that under eating is not necessary. When I did a quick run of your numbers I got a daily intake recommendation of 2140 for someone of your stats who is lightly active (which you are if you workout...you are not sedentary). Even at sedentary you would get an allowance of 1850.

http://www.fat2fitradio.com/tools/bmr/ Try this calculator for a simply explanation of how eating more to lose can work. It worked great for me. Be sure to read all of the information it provides.

I disagree with 1ConcreteGirl, unless the goal is to maintain your current weight (I'm guessing that you want to lose weight if you're using MFP). If you want to lose weight you need a calorie deficit, period. Depending on how fast you want to lose the weight, you may or may not want to eat less than your base calorie needs. Remember, if you eat less than your burn (base or otherwise) the calories needed are going to come from fat (and some muscle likely). That is a GOOD thing if you want to lose weight.

For ladies, the consensus seems to be that we should be eating no less than 1200 cals per day, as it's difficult to get proper micro-nutrients if we're eating less than that. This can be misleading though because it really depends on your size. I get my BMR tested regularly and have a rate of 1440. I'm 5'4 and 115lbs- but I'm an athlete. Someone my same weight that had more fat would probably have a BMR that's closer to 1000. If that person wanted to lose weight and led a sedentary lifestyle, they should NOT be eating 1200 per day (!). If possible, I would test yours.

Back to your goal of losing weight, focus on having a calorie deficit of 500-1000 per day if you want to have weight loss of 3-5lbs per month. It's tough to stick with the 1000 calorie deficit per day in the beginning because you're going to be hungry (and for you that would be 1200 calories or less). You may want to start with a 500 or 750 calorie deficit and see how that feels.