10000000000x around the bush

So today I think I've recommited.....again .... I think by writing something here also that it will help commit me!

Wedding around the corner, who cares right? We've heard it all before.

Since this great relationship I've become my heaviest ever! According to him and nice family members I still look good ("you hide it well", "you don't look like you weigh that much"). I'm grateful no doubt (if it's true) but I feel HUGEEEE. 167lbs current weight at a stunning 5' 4", ideal weight according to BMI and doctors (like they know anything, jk) 137lbs. So 167-137= 30lbs to loose. I was 170 just a couple weeks ago but I weigh myself dressed at the gym so it's that much more humiliating, humbling, whatever you want to call it.

My man is on his diet now and pretty much starves himself until dinner time. I can't do that.

I got myself some sunflower seeds... hoping they keep me from over snacking. Did I mention that I'm a "social smoker" seriously a pack can last me a month, provided I only see my friends one day a weekend or less. Well I'm done with that ****. I got one of those "ecigs" and I'm done with the real thing.

What else?? Not sure...., hoping to fit excercising into my new schedule too (just graduated with my BSA); while I'm at it, I'm also in process of closing on a house (1st time) and planning a marriage and just started a second job (40hrs+ a couple nights a weeks second job instructing a painting class (fun stuff so tolerable!))

Anyways back to my new schedule, I worked out yesterday for the first time in a month or so. Previously, I was working my heart out and then paying the price for the next FOUR DAYS (sore muscles), so yesterday I walked for 30mins, I inclined for like maybe five minutes, got my heartrate to a wooping 119bpm? and stretched for the next 15 mins while I waited for my hubby "to be" to finish up his non-cardio work out (an exaggeration, he moves fast when he does his weights to get his heartrate up, new concept to me, I've tried it it works, hard to get that motivated though).

Ok Lastly, Today I got a Tim Hortons Hazel Nut Latte, I love them I think. They are so good for the first 1/4 cup sips then after that I'm over it and I'm over the calories too. So I drank about 1/4 cup threw the rest out. I also proudly updated my food tracker to read .25 instead of 1 serving. Woot Woot! I'm on the fast track!! hahah...

Ok now the rest of the day, eat my prepacked lunch, no idea how many cals I packed, then out to dinner in town, no time to go home (new job tonight)! Wish me luck! Follow me and I'll follow you. Need a loosing weight pen pal! Back to work now, thanks for listening, any input??