Advice about my boyfriend and bmi

kirianna55
kirianna55 Posts: 459 Member
edited January 11 in Health and Weight Loss
So my local fred meyers put in a blood pressure machine that also measure body fat and weight. According to it my blood pressure is 123/64 and I had been walking really fast right before that. On top of that, it said me weight was exactly 30 pounds lower than my scale and my body fat was were I expected it to be (38.2%). I dont know if I should pay attention to that scale or just listen to mine that refuses to budge as far as weighing myself goes, even if I do count my calories and stay under most days.

My boyfriend finally realized he needed to exercise and get back into boot camp fitness. He has pre-hypertention and a body fat of 28%. He wants to exercise with me to lose weight but doesn't want to count his calories. I suggested he just use mfp to count his protein to make sure he is getting enough of it but he isnt sold yet. He eats most of the same food I do so our calories are pretty close unless he has a snack. I would really love for him to join and get his energy back. Advice?

Replies

  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    I would trust the scale you've been weighing on rather some random scale that you don't know whats happened to.

    Whats your boyfriends height /weight and activity level.

    While eating the same foods as you is fine, men generally have higher caloric requirements so he probably will need to up his portion sizes.

    MFPs calculations for protein are actually really low. As long as he is working out he should be eating 1gram of protein per lb of Lean body mass and you can calculate that here

    http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/lbm_calculator.htm

    Also it would really benefit him to start counting his calories
  • fittiephd
    fittiephd Posts: 608 Member
    That's a REALLY big difference between two scales... I'd probably find a third one to weigh in on and see what it says, maybe at your gym? Especially if your scale hasn't been moving despite your efforts, it may be broken. Another good way to see if your scale is accurate is to take something you know the weight of (for example dumbbells or kettlebells that you assume are accurate) and see if the weight on the scale reflects what the item weighs. Usually body scales need a minimum of 20 lbs to read any weight on them. Or you could get on with and without holding the weight and subtract the difference. Your dumbbells or kettlebells could be off by less than 1 lb plus or minus just from being cheap, but it'd be interesting to see if your scale is accurate.

    My bf is trying to get back into fitness as well, I'm trying to get him to workout with me at the gym.
  • NaomiJFoster
    NaomiJFoster Posts: 1,450 Member
    The machines is stores are not an accurate picture. They are used so frequently by so many people, and they are only very rarely recalibrated. They just don't function properly enough to be reliable for anything other than fun.
  • Rocking_Robin
    Rocking_Robin Posts: 238 Member
    I also say listen to the scale that you have been using... I am so silly when I weigh myself....I have to do it right away in the morning when I wake up, and I have a certain tile on my floor that the scale corner has to be on....so silly I know about the tile, I know :)

    Plateau's stink we all have them, I struggles for months and months, it was tough.... what you can try to do to help a plateau in my opinion is switch your exercise routine up, step things up a little longer than you are exercising now, and I would make sure I add some weight training if your not....weight training keeps your metabolism working longer than cardio.
    Then, just watch your calories close....I even tried switching my food up too..

    I have never done well without counting calories, when I was on Weight Watchers years ago, we did the point system....your boyfriend needs to know what his body needs to get it to work for him.

    Keep encouraging him to join MFP :) MFP ROCKS!!!

    Good Luck to both of you!!
  • kirianna55
    kirianna55 Posts: 459 Member
    My boyfriend weighs 168 pounds and 5'5. For the most part he is very sedentary. I am trying to get him to talk with me every morning and work up to running. Eventually I plan to get him to start weight training. I weight a lot more than he does and our calories are actually pretty close in what we are trying to lose. He wants to lose 0.5 pounds a week to be able to build muscle at the same time and I am trying to drop 2 pounds a week. I have us eating 25% protein. I am eating about 100-150 a day.

    As for my scale. I think it could be broken. It is really retarded and wont weigh anything unless it feels body heat. It wont measure dumbbells. Tomorrow I am going to the doctor so I may weigh myself while I am there.

    (I am 5'7")
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    As far as your boyfriend goes, just keep setting a good example in RE to counting calories, etc...he may or may not come around, much will depend on his results once he starts working out.

    Also, he might want to visit a dr. about the hypertension. Some people can control it through diet and exercise; I'm not one of those people and there are many who can't due to hereditary factors. Even working out the way I do, eating healthy, watching my sodium, losing weight, etc I'm still hypertensive without my meds. At minimum, he should watch it closely...it's definitely something he needs to get under control either way.
  • kirianna55
    kirianna55 Posts: 459 Member
    As far as your boyfriend goes, just keep setting a good example in RE to counting calories, etc...he may or may not come around, much will depend on his results once he starts working out.

    Also, he might want to visit a dr. about the hypertension. Some people can control it through diet and exercise; I'm not one of those people and there are many who can't due to hereditary factors. Even working out the way I do, eating healthy, watching my sodium, losing weight, etc I'm still hypertensive without my meds. At minimum, he should watch it closely...it's definitely something he needs to get under control either way.

    He was adopted so he doesnt know his family history. I know his cholesterol is high and I am trying my best to make him eat healthier to drop it down a bit. He is ok with cutting red meat down and eating more salmon and chicken. It is a work in progress but I keep trying to push him. The last time he saw the doctor she told him to exercise daily and it would reduce his pain. If he built up his muscles and exercised more, he wouldn't hurt as bad. His spine is broken from an assault 11 years ago.
  • Retiredmom72
    Retiredmom72 Posts: 538 Member
    As for scales, use the one you usually use. A scale that anyone can use may not always be accurate. If you think your scale at home is wrong, get a new one. Even with walking fast, your blood pressure was within normal range (120/80).

    As for your bf, suggest that he use mfp but it has to be his choice. You may want to let him watch you track your foods. Since you basically eat the same thing, once you track your food, if he had an account, he could friend you and then go to your food diary and simply copy your meals. He could adjust it, if his portions were different. (I love this feature and didn't know it was possible until recently.) He could then track his exercise as well. Good luck.
  • BobOki
    BobOki Posts: 245 Member
    All great advice!

    As a rule most men find diets, or dieting to be a very feminine activity. MANLY men especially have problems counting cals or weighing foods. Something inside screams this is a girl past time and I think that is a shame. I have gotten plenty of my bros at work on mfp, counting their cals, and still being men, it is just hard to get them to do it. The cals part is a pain and really gets annoying after awhile (and mfp dropping how many days you log in randomly does not help!) and the want to cheat is high.

    How I do it is explain that this is not a diet, this is a change in how you eat, that is long term and not just temporary until you get skinny again. Doing this is committing to being in shape, eating well, and basic life style change. This doesn't mean we can't cheat, or have full cheat days (or months XMAS!!) it just means the rest of the time we do it right. The logging of cals is amazing to get your to understand just what CRAP we put in our bodies, and just how much more you could eat elsewhere instead of that McDouble. Of course, it helps having lost nearly 30 lbs myself and being able to say "SEE? SEE!!?!?!" as this really helps.
  • Retiredmom72
    Retiredmom72 Posts: 538 Member
    It is a work in progress but I keep trying to push him. The last time he saw the doctor she told him to exercise daily and it would reduce his pain. If he built up his muscles and exercised more, he wouldn't hurt as bad. His spine is broken from an assault 11 years ago.
    Be an example but don't push. His doctor needs to approve any exercise program especially since he has had back problems. He wouldn't want to hurt himself.
  • cjsacto
    cjsacto Posts: 1,421 Member
    I am trying to get him to talk with me every morning and work up to running. Eventually I plan to get him to start weight training.

    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling. I think you need to be careful. High cholesterol is definitely a concern, and I'm not saying he's not (a bit) overweight, but like all of us, he has to make the decision about what works for him to make an improvement.

    Yes, of course you want him to be healthy and it would be great if he were on board with the same system you are using, but do you remember how annoying it is when friends were or family have a new passion and think you should love it, too? We are all enthusiastic about MFP but being evangelical about it can backfire.

    It's great that he wants to work out now, and if you do a lot of the cooking you can make sure he's getting healthy food. Otherwise, let him decide what to do as far as counting calories and an exercise regimen. If I caught my boyfriend saying things like that, I'd be resentful and resist his efforts.
  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.
  • cjsacto
    cjsacto Posts: 1,421 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.
  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.

    Not so much. I think it's perceived much worse around her. May because there's too many women though.
  • cjsacto
    cjsacto Posts: 1,421 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.

    Not so much

    Um, yeah, that's my point. That it would have more red flags if a man had posted it, but it's still controlling for a woman to "make him," "push him," "get him to" use the same tools she is using. Did you read my post???
  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.

    Not so much

    Um, yeah, that's my point. That it would have more red flags if a man had posted it, but it's still controlling for a woman to "make him," "push him," "get him to" use the same tools she is using. Did you read my post???

    Yea I don't think that it is generally seen as controlling by the community and more seen as trying to take care of her man. However, if a man posts the exact same thing then it is considered to be controlling even though the intent is the same.

    Hence the double standard.
  • kirianna55
    kirianna55 Posts: 459 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.


    Look, I am worried about my partner. I have been with him almost 5 years. He keeps talking about wanting to get back into boot camp shape and then doesn't do anything. Over the last few days he has finally decided that he does need to lose fat. He wants to drop his body fat % but stay close to 150 once he is done. I am asking for ways to get him to keep track to support him in this. I cook about 85% of our meals and know exactly how many calories we eat. The only big difference in out diet is he eats egg yokes, he drinks soda, and eats solid types of fat. The reason I suggested he join MFP was not completely for the calories but to make sure he is getting enough protein to build up his muscles.
  • cjsacto
    cjsacto Posts: 1,421 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.


    Look, I am worried about my partner. I have been with him almost 5 years. He keeps talking about wanting to get back into boot camp shape and then doesn't do anything. Over the last few days he has finally decided that he does need to lose fat. He wants to drop his body fat % but stay close to 150 once he is done. I am asking for ways to get him to keep track to support him in this. I cook about 85% of our meals and know exactly how many calories we eat. The only big difference in out diet is he eats egg yokes, he drinks soda, and eats solid types of fat. The reason I suggested he join MFP was not completely for the calories but to make sure he is getting enough protein to build up his muscles.

    That is a tough situation. Encourage and support him, but you can't force him. Show him the cool charts and graphs MFP produces, if he's into that kind of thing, let him know how well it has worked for you, but hard as it is you can't make him do it.

    It depends a lot on how open he is to your suggestions. If he feels pressured, though, it could backfire on you.
  • raneylfrick
    raneylfrick Posts: 380 Member
    ANYWAY!!!....Good job on your effort for yourself! It is nice to see that you are concerned for your boyfriend. If it is something he really doesn't want to do, though, just remember to keep it up yourself. Small things, like keeping healthy foods in the house, will help him tremendously...even if he doesn't realize it. Do try to hint to him every now and again that you would love for him to work on his health as much as you are, but don't push it too hard. Much luck!
  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    I have to say, if a man had posted that about his girlfriend, I'd think he was trying to be very controlling.

    Gotta love double standards.


    No, I'm saying that it's still controlling when a woman does it.


    Look, I am worried about my partner. I have been with him almost 5 years. He keeps talking about wanting to get back into boot camp shape and then doesn't do anything. Over the last few days he has finally decided that he does need to lose fat. He wants to drop his body fat % but stay close to 150 once he is done. I am asking for ways to get him to keep track to support him in this. I cook about 85% of our meals and know exactly how many calories we eat. The only big difference in out diet is he eats egg yokes, he drinks soda, and eats solid types of fat. The reason I suggested he join MFP was not completely for the calories but to make sure he is getting enough protein to build up his muscles.

    Truth is you can only do so much. He has to want it and take control. The more you suggest/push certain things like MFP the more he may back away from it. Be there to support him when he needs it and asks for your help but otherwise back off. Though there are somethings you can do like going for walks in the part or working out together but pressuring him into it again may deter him.

    I know you just want to help. And thats commendable, he needs to do his own thing. Support turns into overbearing really quickly so just be careful.

    Also there are a ton of apps for phones thatll track protein so if he doesnt particularly like MFP theres always other options
  • kirianna55
    kirianna55 Posts: 459 Member
    Thanks. I bought him running shoes because he said they were comfortable and made him want to walk. He seems to enjoy walking with me and it helps us be able to talk without dealing with the drama at our place. I suggest things to him that may help but if he doesn't want to do it, I try not to push. He said that he wants to just walk for now but later work on weights with me. I will look into other apps for him if he wants it.
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