anorexic weight gain recovery- help!

Options
vaironika
vaironika Posts: 36
in Motivation and Support
So to start off i am a female,18 years old, 5ft3 and after months of extremely low cal intakes ( about 500 cals/day) and excessive exercising (about 45-60min of pilates/cardio/HIIT) every day my weight dropped down to 77 lbs. My parents are now very worried and want me to gain weight. I want to gain weight as well because all my family members and friends are worried and my energy is very low making it hard to concentrate in university. At the same time it scares me and I can't get over the urge to exercise after eating something high calorie which i am not very used to. I am very confused about how and what to eat. Is it bad to eat something thats very high in fat like almonds and coconut? Those are my main sources of fat (since im a vegan) and i actually enjoy them but im worried if having too much would affect my health negatively or help in the recovery process. Many foods i eat are low cal (like veggies) so the only real dense things i have are almonds and coconut. I felt my body was craving something really dense and fatty so i made raw brownies with 1 cup of almonds, 6 tbsp coconut shreds and 5 medjool dates. I ended eating the entire thing but didn't feel sick. I calculated the calories for the whole batch to be about 1310 calories. So far today i had a total of about 2302 calls. Is this bad? i don't know what to think anymore :S also should i continue some exercise like weight training in the process of gaining weight?
«1

Replies

  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Options
    I'm glad you were able to eat and get some beautiful nutrition in your body. It's good your reaching out I know that sometimes it can be scary and embarassing. Keep learning about healthful nutrition and loving your body. Move in ways that encourage health not control. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum I eat food to hurt my body instead of withholding it like you do to harm your body. I think though that there is a lot we can learn from each other and fight this distorted relationship with food that we have. Be kind to yourself continue to eat the lovely variety of food available. I hope you also have the help of some very sensitive trained professionals who can help you in this battle.
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    Thanks so much for replying! and thanks for that wonderful comment, i hope we can both fight our demons and become strong and healthy again. Yea i'm just reallly scared that all that fat and calorie content will destroy my liver or just get stored as unsightly fat around my body. I wanna be fit and toned but i can't exercise and im supposed to eat at least 2000 cals a day to gain back my weight. :/ this gives me alot of anxiety because im addicted to exercising and have a fear of being fat. And no i dont have any professionals helping me although my parents want to take me to the doctor soon. Do you think its bad to get most my calories from fat?Is this gunna harm my body? im not sure how to approach this whole excessive calorie intake :frown:
  • sassy_sparkles
    sassy_sparkles Posts: 49
    Options
    Coconut, almonds, avocados, and other vegan friendly fare have GOOD fats. Your body needs fats and fatty acids, and eating these good fats isn't going to kill you or hurt your body. Your body likes the good fats! The way the body processes coconut oil (fat) is different from how it uses something less beneficial like fast food grease.

    I admire your commitment to recover from your illness; you are very brave for being so honest in a public arena. Go see your doctor and a nutritionist and follow their instructions. Talk therapy might be helpful as well. Best of luck in your journey to wellness!
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    Aww thanx for the lovely comment. Yea its hard to cope with but after keepin it all in i needed to reach out somehow and thank goodness i found this site filled so many helpful understanding people :smile: and phew, i hope my body just uses the fats for repair and not unhealthy storage, thats just gunna make me want to relapse but im gunna try and stay strong and keep up with the calorie intake. I guess i'll just listen to what my body craves and not think about it too much but its really hard no to worry. I actually like eating the good fats though(ironic since gaining fat is my fear) i just hope im not taking too much advantage of a good thing :S And yea coconut is awesome! although its saturated its supposed to be healthy so i eat it without fear :happy:
  • yonky50
    yonky50 Posts: 29 Member
    Options
    When my daughter was 19 she started to diet and exercise excessiively and she went from 125 to 86 in less than a year. She realized she needed to eat more and stop exercising but as much as she tried she couldn't do it by herself or with our help. We found a doctor who specialised in treating annorexia thru talk and group therapy and she slowly got better over the next year. The doctor said she wasn't anorexic but this was her way to control what she could. At the weight you say you are, I think you should seriously consider professional help now. Don't wait. With help you will learn how to eat in a balanced way again.
  • devrinator
    devrinator Posts: 79 Member
    Options
    As long as you avoid processed, high fat foods such as fried potatoes and chips, foods such as avocados and nuts will do a lot of good for you. You may have a nutrient issue, so inadvertently eating a lot of calories one day won't be bad at all. Also, I have no clue, but I'm wondering if those high density foods such as nuts may be better, because they have a lower volume??

    Maybe if you spread them out during the day, your body will process them without much discomfort? A few during breakfast, some near lunch, a few a night?

    I'm thinking you might want to talk to your doctor about how quickly you can increase your calories. If you go too slowly, your body will be nutrient starved and that might continue a plethora of issues, but if you jump too high you might not be ready for the rapid changes, nor your body. It sounds like you will choose healthy foods and that you're probably on the right track.
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    It sounds like your daughter and I are very similar. I don't really think im anorexic because i still eat, but the amounts i eat and my excessive exercise is whats possessing me and yes its the control that makes me feel empowered but im learning to relax and try not to have such strict rituals like i used to but again it is difficult to do by myself. I still exercise when i think my family isnt around but not too excessively, just some muscle toning pilate videos. And yes i would love to have a healthy balanced way of eating again, this excessive calorie intake is throwing me off and i don't have a very good eating plan as i would eat veggies and fruit during the morning then binge about 1500 cals worth of dense fatty foods in the middle of the day causing me to feel bloated and spit up :S the change is very overwhelming
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    Yea i think the nutrient issue is making me eat excessive amounts of fats, specifically the almonds. I went through 2 16oz jars of almond butter in 2 weeks and had much more raw almonds in the form of my raw almond brownies on top of that (probably about 4 cups of almonds) i dont see any bad changes to my body though but im scared to continue like this, hopefully this almond craze is just a phase that will pass? is this really bad to eat this much almonds in a month?
  • nataliefamily3
    nataliefamily3 Posts: 190
    Options
    I agree with all suggestions above maybe high cal protein shake made with whole milk, banana, peanut butter, and chocolate can help up your intake without the added food anxiety. Also maybe pick a workout with a lower burn like walking or yoga. I suffered through ana from 15 to 18.
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    Thanks for the suggestion! im actually trying to start getting into make smoothies to boost my cals instead of bingeing on just nuts, much more variety of nutrition! im happy to hear from someone who has gone through the stresses of ana, have you fully recovered? if so how did u do it?
  • VorJoshigan
    VorJoshigan Posts: 1,106 Member
    Options
    I kinda feel like I shouldn't even be in this thread, but I just wanted to say congratulations on trying to make a change to get healthier.

    The only piece of advice that I feel comfortable giving is this: Don't be afraid of your food. Years of therapy helped me lose weight, it might be able to help you get to a healthy weight. Good luck!
  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
    Options
    You should see your doctor and get a referral to a specialist. It is often not as simple as eating more as people who have been severely restricting and significantly underweight need to be careful about what foods and and how quickly they reintroduce them back into their diet.

    Good luck with your recovery.
  • SquidVonBob
    SquidVonBob Posts: 290 Member
    Options
    I think a doctors advice is the best way to go, but as for right now, you might want to up your calories by say, 100 every other day. This might help you not feel sick and bloated when eating. Your body is most likely craving fatty foods because it knows it needs the fat to function. Almonds and coconut are awesome! Don't worry about those. Like I said though, I'm no professional and a nutritionist could help you along. Most Universities have nutritionists on staff at the health center, so give that a try. It's great you're trying to beat this. :D

    I also suggest Multivitamins.
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
    Options
    First, I am happy to see you taking steps to overcome the disorder and build a healthier you.

    Sara is correct. Most doctors will have you reintroduce varying levels of macronutrients, electrolytes, minerals, etc, through stages so that your body accepts what you are feeding it. In fact, if memory serves me right, most refeed programs focus on fats during the first phase.

    If your weight got down to 77 lbs, you will gain most of your weight back from fat mass since only a small percent of lean body mass will be recovered. You can talk to a specialist about it, but lifting weights will help increase the amount of lean body mass recovered. This increase in lean body mass will also aid in recovering your Resting Metabolic Rate faster, allowing you to eat more without gaining excessive fat mass.
  • kiwi4ever
    kiwi4ever Posts: 1
    Options
    Varonika, I would suggest that you also seek the assistance and guidance of a well trained nutritionist. Refeeding after severe weight loss can be a dangerous process. In other words, your electrolytes go haywire, magnesium and phosphorus can be very low and you can develop cardiac issues. I have walked this very dicey road with my 14 year old son who was a terrific athlete, and he nearly died as a result. You will gain weight, and in the beginning it will be more fat than I am sure you will want. But you can expect to take at least a year to gain to 100 or 110, and then you can begin resculpting your body. Please go and see both a counselor and a nutritionist. This is affecting your brain and your hormones. Take care, and put yourself first....your health is the most important issue.....
  • clhous03
    clhous03 Posts: 73
    Options
    If you ever need to talk, here's a good crisis line number that I know: 1(877) 803-7577. Good luck to you!
  • vaironika
    vaironika Posts: 36
    Options
    Wow thanx for all the great advice! I've never had so much support before, it makes me feel more positive :smile: it sucks though to hear that i will be gaining a lot of fat mass, this might send me into relapse so i will definately seek out a nutritionist and hopefully get things sorted. I am feeling much more energetic however after eating all those fats and cals and i think i'v put on a pound or two in the past two days, maybe it will stay if i try hard enough not to exercise and restrict again. I didn't know there was a specific process in reintroducing foods, that probably explains the head rushes i get when i eat too much at once. And how often should i exercise a week? i think its good to get at least SOME muscle toning in the process right?
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
    Options
    A doctor will help you along the way, Vaironika. They will assess whether reintroduction of exercise in general at this point will be a benefit with low risk of engaging in aerobic activity, which can cause a relapse in undesirable behavior. If anything, the doctor will allow you to do resistance training and nothing else to help increase the recovery rate of lost lean body mass - assuming you are indeed increasing calories to adequate amounts. Again, that is something they can help you with along with your nutrient refeeding needs.

    You may enjoy reading this lady's story about recovering from anorexia and how weight training helped with the process, both physically and psychologically:
    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hunger-artist/201101/what-weight-lifting-can-do-former-anorexic
  • yonky50
    yonky50 Posts: 29 Member
    Options
    Glad to see you will talk to a nutritionist.:smile:
  • tiffanyschleif
    tiffanyschleif Posts: 2 Member
    Options
    I am recovering from anorexia. And it warms my heart to see so much support. I struggled through my recovery process as well. Following a clean unproccessed diet and lifting heavy weights a couple times a week brought on weight in beautiful muscle, not fat. Almonds actually burn body fat, as well as avocados. So eat up and lift heavy! :)

Categories