Feeling like the road is too long and impossible.

ldrosophila
ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm feeling a bit down today. I'm looking at how far I need to go and it just seems so impossible and unrealstic. Thinking about the 95% or more who gain back the weight, and it's getting me down. I was doing pretty good the last few days, but maybe it's this stupid cold I have or the fact I'm drugged up on cold medicine.

My fiance continues to lose weight, and I keep thinking I'll never be smaller than him.

I know theres only one option to move foward, but I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed today.

Cheerleaders around?

Replies

  • mdcjmom
    mdcjmom Posts: 597 Member
    Me! We can do this!
  • UKMarjie
    UKMarjie Posts: 257 Member
    Heh Mrs! So here is what I suggest - for the cold - gross but works - get some saline nasal spray - will help clear out your nasal passages and take down the swelling.

    Eat something cheerful and healthy - my go to on this is frozen yoghurt smoothies - get a whole bunch of berries (full of vitamin C) and then blend it up with a cup of the frozen yoghurt...you will feel the surge of the vitamins like a cup of sunshine.

    Also, take a bath and then put on some fresh jammies and get under a blanket and feel as sorry for yourself as you need to - but do it while watching something that makes you laugh out loud on TV - I like the pink panther, buster keaton or Peter Sellers because they are just so stupid you have to laugh.

    Chin up cocotte - tomorrow is another day and there will be another after that. Hard work will pay off it just might be more of a war of attrition than a decisive victory every day. So maybe focus on things like - fitting into your clothes better, changing your shape, your overall improved health (once your cold goes - lol), and the side benefits of eating better (improved sleep, improved skin, hair, stamina at the gym)... SMILE you are doing great!
  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,237 Member
    Option #1- do you have short term goals? How far apart are they "spaced"? Is it reasonable for you to achieve them before getting frustrated or overwhelmed? If not-set yourself goals for whatever timeframe you need to in order to feel you've achieved something-and focus on the short term goals. For example, I'm going to eat x servings of vegetables every day for a week, or I'm going to get x minutes of activity every day for the next month (or this week) or even, I'm going to do well today or I'm going to make today better than yesterday. Whatever you need to do.

    Option #2-focus on how far you've come. You've made tremendous progress and should be proud of yourself for making it this far

    Option #3 - a total paradigm shift (this is what I had to do for myself). My goal is to eat better and exercise according to plan everyday. As long as I do that, the weight loss will take care of itself (and it has). I am in this for the long haul-I don't have an end goal or an end date. I need to eat better and exercise for the rest of my life-so there's no time that I'll be "done" with that. So every day I eat better and exercise according to plan, I achieved my goal. The pounds come off when they come off-but knowing that this is forever, and really thinking about it in terms of forever has helped me stop focusing on how much further I have to go (since it's forever-as long as I'm alive, I'm doing this), and helped me stop worrying about time and how long it is taking or will take-again, I've got the rest of my life to live like this. Really hammering into my brain that there is no "end", there's no "done", it just is-forever and ever amen, has really changed how I view this whole process with all its ups and downs.

    Option #4 - just take some cheering. You can totally do this-you've already achieved something so many people haven't, you are awesome for that alone! You want to live a long happy life with your fiancé, he won't care bow long it takes because he wants you to be happy and healthy and live that long happy life with him. You can totally do this!
  • bewell2
    bewell2 Posts: 2
    I think we all feel this way. You are smart to ask for encouragement. I use to not read anything much about nutrition because of all the contradictions. It all seemed too big. Now I focus on getting the most nutrient dense plant foods into my body. They happen to be pretty low in calories and filling fiber so that's a bonus! They keep cravings down and I'm not starving to stay at my calorie goals. Also I feel I can make these life long changes so I won't be in the 95% regainer club. My beliefs that God will lead me each day is a huge comfort also. Hang in there it will be worth the effort.
  • RobinC37
    RobinC37 Posts: 242 Member
    Try some ginger tea for your sinuses. Maybe 10-15 minutes of light yoga would help open up your airways and make you feel like you did something, even it if wasn't strenuous. If you really feel like crap though, just sleep it out of your system. As far as the rest goes, well no one said it would always be easy or fun. But putting one more year into this is going to be a lot easier than living the rest of your life overweight. :) We are all here for you, so keep your head up! We will all get there together.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
    I think you're a total rock star for losing 58 lbs! I've only lost 3 so far. :/ Also agree with short term goals.

    "Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did."

    http://www.quotegarden.com/perseverance.html
  • cdmatlock1
    cdmatlock1 Posts: 21 Member
    awwwww. hang in there......we all have those days............
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
    i KNOW this feeling all to well. Set short term goals, reach them and treat yourself, dont reach them and get stuborn, adjust and try again.

    Make the goals real, measurable and realistically achievable.
    write them down, tell someone, keep track, and reward.
    example lose 5 pounds a month, sure it would be great to lose 8 but 5 is much more realistic and reasonable and if i do for feb i'll treat myself to X and for march Y and for april Z etc.

    you can do it, just keep at it
  • mamasmaltz3
    mamasmaltz3 Posts: 1,111 Member
    Go to the gym, Walmart, sporting goods store wherever you need to go and find two 30 lb dumbbells. Trying carrying those around the store or gym for a while. That is how far you have come. Can you imagine carrying that around again? Think how great you will feel taking off another set of 30 lb dumbbells. I say this to you because I just picked them up the other day and can't believe how much weight that really feels like. It will put it into perspective for you. Your doing great, concentrate on today and the choices you make today. Then do that again tomorrow and the next day and the next day and the.....................................
  • bostonwolf
    bostonwolf Posts: 3,038 Member
    The longest journey begins with a single step.

    By taken that step, you just lapped everyone who thought what you have and said "**** it"

    I can think of lots of times I've had to drag myself to the gym or out for a run because I just didn't want to do it. I can't remember a single time when after the fact I didn't feel great or regretted going.
  • bpotts44
    bpotts44 Posts: 1,066 Member
    You've lost almost 60 lbs. That's an awesome accomplishment. Just keep going.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
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  • rluethke42
    rluethke42 Posts: 1
    You CAN do this. Start with small goals. That's what I'm doing and it seems to help. Looking at the big goal always makes me feel like I'm going to fail too. Keep your chin up and you WILL SUCCEED!!!!
    :happy:
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Thank you all for giving this sicky person here some cheerleading motivation. I talked to my fiance too who said you will get there and to lean on him. I'm getting some great support. The only person that would stop me is me!

    And all of you said to aim for the little goal you are right!

    My goal is to go below 300lbs I am 7lbs away! I will get there I thank you all so much for the great advice. There is some great support on MFP.

    I got some great quotes and inspiration too.

    You only fail if you quit!
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
    i can remember hitting the under 300 mark, you'll love it :drinker:
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
    Remember - you are not a statistic, so it doesn't matter what statistics say.

    You are an individual, and you can do it if you really want it.
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
    Remind yourself daily of all the successes you've had so far. All you have to do is keep doing what you already know you can do. You can do this.

    And boy do little goals help, because if I think about the whole distance I wonder what the heck I'm thinking.
  • CloneSN
    CloneSN Posts: 42 Member
    i can completely relate. I sometimes question why i'm putting myself through such intense cardio when all i want to do is sit and do nothing, but all it takes is seeing the light at the other end of the tunnel. Even though it may be small right now, the more we push ahead, the bigger that light gets. Time and patience. :flowerforyou:
  • CloneSN
    CloneSN Posts: 42 Member
    Option #1- do you have short term goals? How far apart are they "spaced"? Is it reasonable for you to achieve them before getting frustrated or overwhelmed? If not-set yourself goals for whatever timeframe you need to in order to feel you've achieved something-and focus on the short term goals. For example, I'm going to eat x servings of vegetables every day for a week, or I'm going to get x minutes of activity every day for the next month (or this week) or even, I'm going to do well today or I'm going to make today better than yesterday. Whatever you need to do.

    Option #2-focus on how far you've come. You've made tremendous progress and should be proud of yourself for making it this far

    Option #3 - a total paradigm shift (this is what I had to do for myself). My goal is to eat better and exercise according to plan everyday. As long as I do that, the weight loss will take care of itself (and it has). I am in this for the long haul-I don't have an end goal or an end date. I need to eat better and exercise for the rest of my life-so there's no time that I'll be "done" with that. So every day I eat better and exercise according to plan, I achieved my goal. The pounds come off when they come off-but knowing that this is forever, and really thinking about it in terms of forever has helped me stop focusing on how much further I have to go (since it's forever-as long as I'm alive, I'm doing this), and helped me stop worrying about time and how long it is taking or will take-again, I've got the rest of my life to live like this. Really hammering into my brain that there is no "end", there's no "done", it just is-forever and ever amen, has really changed how I view this whole process with all its ups and downs.

    Option #4 - just take some cheering. You can totally do this-you've already achieved something so many people haven't, you are awesome for that alone! You want to live a long happy life with your fiancé, he won't care bow long it takes because he wants you to be happy and healthy and live that long happy life with him. You can totally do this!

    I love this post!
  • Jess11Gold
    Jess11Gold Posts: 154 Member
    Is this where I can vent and let it all out?! I hope so becauuuuse: I'm having FAT day! I have been busting my rear to stay under my RDI (recommended calorie intake) Working out, including Julian Michaels 30 day shred. and clean eating. I had to throw out my scale because it was barely moving and totally bringing me down! I have been able to stay motivated by knowing that I am eating right and working out and not letting a number define me... I am doing this the healthy way instead of my past "fad" dieting, loosing a ton then gaining back even more.
    With all that said, I feel like I look the same! My clothes even fit the same... Today I am totally mentally exhausted and fighting a hamburger run. I feel like this is the longest road ever. I feel like I am doing all this for nothing.... I mean its been a full month, where are my results :(
  • JessiM03
    JessiM03 Posts: 5
    Hang in there! I got so down a few days ago b/c whenever I'm on my period, I gain 7 lbs. It makes it really difficult to keep goals in mind when I weigh myself that week. You've come so far! Keep it up! And don't compare yourself to your fiance. He loves you and is attracted to you, so don't judge yourself by his body. Remember how much better you feel now than you did before you started this. If you keep that in mind, you're bound to keep up the good habits!
  • Pinkigloopyxie
    Pinkigloopyxie Posts: 231
    You just get sad sometimes. I became angry and bored with having to log everything every single damned day and thought about it so much I couldn't even sit down to eat without having to log calories first. It took up too much of my time. Three months later after easing off of mfp, haven't lost weight, but havent gained either. Told myself last july I'd be under 200 by the new year.

    But nope. I'm so bored with food, with cooking. Bored with recipes, the same old crap, just tired and sad in general. It needs to be spring like right now, I need the sun, I need warmth and grass.

    'Course, I'd also like to get pretty fit, like guy fit, but I become so apathetic I can't even push myself off the ground to do pushups at times and just lay on the floor feeling sad.

    My philosophy is sort of 'As long as you wake up every day, as long as you just wake up, things have a chance to get better. And if you can manage to do more, that's great too.' Just keep trying every day.

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