Can't wait til Mother's Day is over...

toots99
toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
edited September 20 in Motivation and Support
...no offense to the Mommies here, but man I can't wait til this weekend is over. My Mom passed away five years ago this month, and every d@mn time I turn on the TV, turn on the radio, or turn around...it's all about mother's day! I can't escape it. Why don't they have a Don't Have A Mother Day? Oh yeah, I guess that's everyday.

Not trying to rain on any Mommies' parade, but it's just a constant reminder. I especially love those people who think it's a chore to have see their Mom or to buy their Mom flowers and say thanks. Ingrates.

Rant over.

Replies

  • cupcakecanuck
    cupcakecanuck Posts: 2
    i hear ya. coming up for 3 years for me. I was driving to work this morning and an ad on the radio had me tears.
  • MandyC82
    MandyC82 Posts: 73
    I understand, only in a different way. My father passed away last July, so it hasn't quite been a year yet. I'm not sure how father's day will go yet, although this has given me a pretty good idea! I hope you understand how great it is that you weren't one of those people who didn't like giving their mother's presents, you were closer to your mother than that. Don't forget that hun.
  • pbxr
    pbxr Posts: 100 Member
    (((hugs))) It's been 10 years this August for me. I really do try to focus on being the Mom to my kids, but picking out cards for my sisters & grandmother each year is such a painful process...much less all the TV, radio, & internet stuff. *sigh* Hang in there ~ you aren't alone.
  • jrbowers83
    jrbowers83 Posts: 282 Member
    I'm so sorry for your pain and sadness. I just lost my grandmother...mother's day is a reach out to all the moms in my life not just my own, so I have the painful reminder of her death everytime I look at the card I was going to give her for mother's day. But I also have found joy in knowing that she is in Heaven, peaceful and happy like we can't begin to know. Try to focus on the positive. You don't "don't have a mother". Just because she's not here on this earth anymore doesn't mean she's not with you or that this can't be a day to celebrate. Go buy her some flowers and visit her gravesite, or just set aside some time on Sunday to "talk" to her tell her how you feel and how much you miss her. Look through some old photos of some happy times and cherish the mother's days you used to have. Hope you feel better come Monday.
  • twistygirl
    twistygirl Posts: 517 Member
    If your greived by this Day then you been blessed that you have had a wonderful Mother. Perhaps you need to celebrate your Mothers life on this special day. Cook and enjoy the foods that she loved and count your blessing for having known her do something wonderful in her memory plant some flowers. I just try to make the best out of what ever life brings bc life is tooo short to spend it in pain.............twistygirl
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
    Thanks for the thoughts. I really try to look at it as "Well now she gets to be with her Mom on Mother's Day" since her Mom died 25 years before. I try to put a positive spin on it. Doesn't always work though.

    :flowerforyou:
  • maryann73
    maryann73 Posts: 763 Member
    A common tradition is to wear a red or pink carnation to honor a living mother. A white carnation is to honor a deceased or "missed" mother. (Doesn't matter if you miss them due to death or absence.) Maybe you can wear a white carnation as a gesture of honor and to acknowledge your Mom. (just a thought.)

    I'm sorry for your loss. When ever a friend of mine loses a parent during the year, I send a sympathy card at the time, and a "I'm thinking of you" card at either father's or mother's day. It really is tough. It will be over soon! Hang in there!
  • iguanaliz
    iguanaliz Posts: 95 Member
    I know where you're coming from, sort of. I lost my dad 12 years ago in January. It was 5 years before I could even think about holidays without crying. My husband lost his father 3 years ago in November. We still can't celebrate Thanksgiving. Just know that eventually, the pain dulls, then dissipates. And that's okay! Love doesn't hurt. Grief does. Break free from the pain, when it's time, and you'll reach a point where you'll find that your mom is always with you. The one thing you can't do is be bitter. It prolongs the pain. Your mom was special. So take twistygirl's advice and celebrate your mom's life on mother's day. Plant something. Cook her favorite meal. Light a candle. Do something that would be meaningful to her and you and love that she was your mom...and still is.
  • rjadams
    rjadams Posts: 4,029 Member
    me too. I lost my mom three years ago at christmas. My daughters live 1800 miles away and I wasn't their custodial parent their step monster was so I never got the school mother's day gifts. it sucks. I hate mothers day. I have great daughters but they don't get it yet and I really really miss my mother. she was the best. I just wish it was all over.
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
    me too. I lost my mom three years ago at christmas. My daughters live 1800 miles away and I wasn't their custodial parent their step monster was so I never got the school mother's day gifts. it sucks. I hate mothers day. I have great daughters but they don't get it yet and I really really miss my mother. she was the best. I just wish it was all over.

    I'm sorry to hear that. Want to come to my pity party? :drinker:
  • vhuber
    vhuber Posts: 8,779 Member
    I am sorry for your loss and obvious grief you still have! I also envy the LOVE relationship you had with your mother! My mother had 13 children and is one of the coldest-negative-unhappy-unapprceciative mothers you could ever meet so buying her one of those cards that fits or describes the wonderful mom is VERY hard to find when you buy her a card! She does not phone nor visit her children ,WE must go to her! Nothing is done right when we do do things and she is running down one or more of her other children when you go there! She talks of "fat" people as if they are going to give her a disease or it may rub off onto her!! I sound horrible talking of my own mother like this and I have tried over and over to Honor and Love my mother like the Bible says, but to no avail. She NEVER says I love you or I miss you. It is soooooo sad and hurtfull! All I can say is take each memory and rejoice that she loved you enough to let you miss her!! When my mother goes it will be with regret of what it could have been like between a mother and a daughter. I tell my children (who are adults now) I love them whenever we speak to each other!!! I wish you everyday a happy memory day of your mom!!! Feel blessed by this!!!
  • sniffles
    sniffles Posts: 295
    Just on a side note... some people did NOT have good mothers. *shrug* So some people won't be buying flowers or cards for reasons that are difficult for those who've had decent mothers to understand.

    I actually had a bit of an argument about this very topic today. Haha.

    That said I'm very sorry for your loss. I hate holidays of any sort, I think they're silly. We should celebrate our loved ones EVERY day, not just on days that our culture has chosen.
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