5 most terrifying side effects of exercise

runningfataway
runningfataway Posts: 262
in Fitness and Exercise
#4. Constant, Endless Sweat

You've been doing well. Real well. You've increased your exercise time from 20 minutes a day a few days a week to an hour or more daily. You've run a 5K, a 10K. Maybe swam half a mile and stayed in the top 10 percent of the race. Hell, you bike the 10 miles to work and back daily. Your clothes became too loose to wear a while ago, leaving you with no choice but to buy a new wardrobe. A sexy, tight-fitting wardrobe with all the nipples cut out.

Things are good.

Except that you've noticed that when you go out with your (pathetically fatter, slower) friends, you're always covered in sheen of sweat while they're baby-powder dry. No, that's not exactly right. You're actively sweating. Profusely. In fact, you constantly look like you've just stepped out of the gym or perhaps a swimming pool. A swimming pool filled with armpit grease.

According to Lance Armstrong's coach, Chris Carmichael, as you become more fit you sweat sooner and you sweat more. In essence, as you increase your exercise intensity and duration, you condition your body to be better prepared for the athletic punishment you regularly put it through. This manifests itself in many ways: low body fat, increased muscle content, stronger bones, higher glycogen storage, lower heart rate. And you sweat like Patrick Ewing.


Your body knows that you're prone to taking off on 50-mile bike rides, and it has to be ready to cool you down. But it can't tell the difference between a pre-ride warm-up and a flight of stairs to your office. So to be on the safe side, it just turns the sweat faucets on and lets loose anytime your heart rate increases by an additional beat per minute.


Read more: http://www.cracked.com/article_19186_the-5-most-terrifying-side-effects-exercise.html#ixzz2K5uduF9b

Replies

  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    I'm confused.
  • nz_deevaa
    nz_deevaa Posts: 12,209 Member
    I'm confused.

    *looks about*

    Maybe the rest are too scary to share?
  • cubanbruin
    cubanbruin Posts: 31 Member
    read the WHOLE article and laughed my *kitten* off x)
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
    I'm confused.
    Yeah, this. I've never been a heavy sweater. After 3 years of exercising, I'm still not a heavy sweater.
  • wellbert
    wellbert Posts: 3,924 Member
    I pretty much didn't sweat at all. Ever. I could walk around in 103' weather and be dry as a bone.
    But now that I'm fitter, I sweat pretty easily. Not enough for armpit stains, but. A pretty good amount.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member

    Yeah, this. I've never been a heavy sweater. After 3 years of exercising, I'm still not a heavy sweater.

    Yeah me too.. I sweat during exercise, but the rest of the time not so much. I don't even get half as hot during the summer when I'm thinner.
  • Gallowmere1984
    Gallowmere1984 Posts: 6,626 Member
    read the WHOLE article and laughed my *kitten* off x)

    This. It was pretty amusing, especially #1.
  • x_ItNeverEnds_x
    x_ItNeverEnds_x Posts: 134
    I hate you non sweaters. I sweat so easily. I can be cold and sweat! In the summer I can sit around in a bikini and sweat. Can't ever own anything white because it's got pit stains after 3 wears. It's gross!

    Actully read what you posted. "According to Lance Armstrong's coach, Chris Carmichael, as you become more fit you sweat sooner and you sweat more." I must be super fit! Why can't I see my muscles? Why am I covered in fat? This is BS!
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I think I will never take up running.



    #5. Running Makes You Poop Yourself
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
    I pretty much didn't sweat at all. Ever. I could walk around in 103' weather and be dry as a bone.
    But now that I'm fitter, I sweat pretty easily. Not enough for armpit stains, but. A pretty good amount.
    Me too. But I'm also super uncomfortable in hot weather. I surmise it's because I don't sweat much. It used to make me self conscious at the gym, like it makes me look like I'm not putting the effort in. But my clothes are nice and fresh so whatever.
  • Gallowmere1984
    Gallowmere1984 Posts: 6,626 Member
    I think I will never take up running.



    #5. Running Makes You Poop Yourself

    No, running makes you poo behind barriers during marathons. Cycling is what makes you poo yourself. Re-read to verify. :D
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I think I will never take up running.



    #5. Running Makes You Poop Yourself

    No, running makes you poo behind barriers during marathons. Cycling is what makes you poo yourself. Re-read to verify. :D

    lol... i never liked cycling anyway. :happy:

    but I've seen pics of people running with poo going down their legs. Good on that chick for stopping instead of soiling herself.
  • MsJulielicious
    MsJulielicious Posts: 708 Member
    LOLZ! Article made me giggle. Thanks!
  • bacamacho
    bacamacho Posts: 306 Member
    LOL! Yeah, when I'm regularly training I sweat doing hard maths.
  • danmcgarrigle5
    danmcgarrigle5 Posts: 90
    I used to soak all my clothes when I worked at UPS, jean shorts and tshirt both soaked through, stopped working there gained 60 pounds, after a few years now I'm working out again (couldn't due to health issues) and this is the end of the first week of doing an hour of cardio vs 45 minutes and I'm soaking shirts again and I love it

    :happy:
  • jimmie65
    jimmie65 Posts: 655 Member
    LOL.
    But this one's better: http://www.cracked.com/article_19130_6-fitness-tips-everyones-heard-that-dont-work-at-all.html
  • stephdeeable
    stephdeeable Posts: 1,407 Member
    I hope this isn't true as I am already a sweaty beast. I sweat more from peeling an orange then most people do on a 5-mile hike.
  • BelindaDuvessa
    BelindaDuvessa Posts: 1,014 Member
    Cracked is an awesome website. Lots of funnies come from there.
  • beckyboop712
    beckyboop712 Posts: 383 Member
    I hate you non sweaters. I sweat so easily. I can be cold and sweat! In the summer I can sit around in a bikini and sweat. Can't ever own anything white because it's got pit stains after 3 wears. It's gross!

    Actully read what you posted. "According to Lance Armstrong's coach, Chris Carmichael, as you become more fit you sweat sooner and you sweat more." I must be super fit! Why can't I see my muscles? Why am I covered in fat? This is BS!

    Me too!! I sweat at the drop of a hat. I'm with ya on the white clothing. I've tried bleach, oxyclean, wearing an under shirt...pit stains still appear. I give!
  • wellbert
    wellbert Posts: 3,924 Member
    I pretty much didn't sweat at all. Ever. I could walk around in 103' weather and be dry as a bone.
    But now that I'm fitter, I sweat pretty easily. Not enough for armpit stains, but. A pretty good amount.
    Me too. But I'm also super uncomfortable in hot weather. I surmise it's because I don't sweat much. It used to make me self conscious at the gym, like it makes me look like I'm not putting the effort in. But my clothes are nice and fresh so whatever.

    This. Exercise in 60f? ENDLESS ENERGY. 80+? Full on slug mode.

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