Breaking the vicious circle

Options
Why do we sabotage ourselves by returning to our old eating habits (even if only for a day), then torture ourselves over the numbers on the scales and then beat ourselves up mentally when the numbers go up, which makes us feel bad and then turn to food to feel better? The constant mind games and categorising food as bad for you or good for you, when really we all know that in moderation nothing is really bad for you. How have you overcome this battle within yourselves??

Replies

  • knowwhentoshutup
    knowwhentoshutup Posts: 318 Member
    Options
    I changed my 'definition' of success.

    I stopped being unrealistic.

    I worked on bettering my relationship with food.

    I stopped comparing myself to everyone else.

    I figured out that it is not all about eating lettuce and refusing myself food.

    I read this: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    I made goals and stuck with them. (Woot! Two half marathon's last year!)

    I focus on things that really matter, not just the number on the scale. Yes, I want it going down, but I also want to be healthy, physically, mentally, emotionally, etc.

    I found people on here that are supportive, and inspirational.

    I kept the promise I made to myself.

    I measure and track progress - BEYOND the scale.

    I've learned to be patient.

    Never give up.

    (Edited to add: No, I don't always feel like it. No, not every run/workout/exercise is great. But, I'm plugging along. One day at a time.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    Options
    By eating in moderation. I'm going to catch a lot of flack for this - but you have to practice it. People who are thin/fit/at a healthy weight are able to manage their eating choices. The realize it's okay to have treats, but you need more healthy food. They may have a slice of cake - just not half a cake.

    No food is bad. No food is off limits. I've just learned that I don't need "all the food, all the time" so it's no big deal when I want to have something that people wouldn't consider "healthy".

    It takes practice but to me, it's a much better alternative than cutting out foods forever or trying to be overly restrictive.
  • alasin1derland
    alasin1derland Posts: 575 Member
    Options
    wow, good answer!
  • denisek80
    denisek80 Posts: 82 Member
    Options
    I've realised that most of the time I've not been eating enough or over eating, not allowing my body to get used to a routine of food (skipping breakfast, big lunch cos I was starving and then late dinners) and therefore has been hanging onto the calories I've been eating as it never knew when it would next get them
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    Options
    Great answer! Thank you I'm finding that the hardest battle is not so much what I'm eating but the guilt I feel afterwards. I've started following the 'eat more to weigh less' method and it all completely makes sense, it just feels strange. It's like being told all of a sudden that something that was forbidden for many years is now all of a sudden ok, so I'm just trying to get my head around it!

    The idea that food is good, bad, forbidden, etc is exactly why so many people fail at dieting. Food is just food. It's fuel for your body. It's enjoyable. It's social. But it's an inanimate object. You control it - it can't even move without you. So why do we give it so much power to be "evil" or tempting or super? It's just food.

    If I want to have a bowl of Lucky Charms (and I do almost every day) then I have it. No big deal - because I know that I made good choices to balance it out. As long as it fits in my calorie goal, that's what matters.
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
    Options
    I changed my 'definition' of success.

    I stopped being unrealistic.

    I worked on bettering my relationship with food.

    I stopped comparing myself to everyone else.

    I figured out that it is not all about eating lettuce and refusing myself food.

    I read this: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    I made goals and stuck with them. (Woot! Two half marathon's last year!)

    I focus on things that really matter, not just the number on the scale. Yes, I want it going down, but I also want to be healthy, physically, mentally, emotionally, etc.

    I found people on here that are supportive, and inspirational.

    I kept the promise I made to myself.

    I measure and track progress - BEYOND the scale.

    I've learned to be patient.

    Never give up.

    (Edited to add: No, I don't always feel like it. No, not every run/workout/exercise is great. But, I'm plugging along. One day at a time.

    Personally, I haven't broken the cycle yet, but I'm working on it and this is pretty much what I'm aiming for (save the marathons)
  • jacksonpt
    jacksonpt Posts: 10,413 Member
    Options
    By realizing and then accepting that this is a lifelong process and that there will be good days and bad days.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
    Options
    This takes time and hard work. One bad meal or day doesn't put you back at square one. Always log it keeps you accountable. Every single day is a brand spanking shiny new start. Grab it with both hands.

    Don't weigh every day, and if it messes with your mind do not weigh in after a bad day. Wait until a few days later when your back on track and have been getting your water in etc. Get someone to hide the scale of you have to!

    The cycles can be broken if you allow space in your macros for those little pleasures you enjoy in life. I often have a treat. I just make sure I pre log and it fits in.

    I eat 1700. I have 2000 on a Saturday if i want followed by 1400 suday to even it out. Means I can have a treat. I still try to stay within my carb ratios... But last week for example I had Diane sauce on my steak with mange tout, baby corn and roast potatoes for dinner and I had extra yummy nuts at night time.

    I didn't go over my carb count, and evened it out with a low day so it didn't have a negative effect on my losses. You just have to get thinking about what you'd really enjoy with those extra calories and make up for it along the line
    I find doing this has stopped me feeling deprived and ending up having a day where I think.. Mthays it I don't care... I'm having what ever I want!

    Over time your tastes and desires change mostly. Your idea of a slap up naught meal is no longer McDonald's! You start fantasising about a much healthier alternative. Like a yummy steak and Roast veggies. I know early days my fast food cravings drove me nutty. It gets much easier because you realise those things aren't that great, don't make you feel good when you eat them and there's many things you'd rather use your calories on.

    It takes time, patience and will, power to change your thinking around. Don't be too hard on yourself, be patient... If you fall off get straight back on later that day or tomorrow... Just don't let it drag on! If your here every day logging and being mindful of what you eat, you'll find your thought train will change significantly.

    We all mess up... Every day is not perfect... But every day is a new one... Wash, rinse and repeat! Lol.

    Good luck!

    Zara x
  • elainecroft
    elainecroft Posts: 595 Member
    Options
    I try to make good choices and develop good habits - one choice at a time. It's a struggle, but for me the goal is to get a healthy lifestyle that I want to live with, even if it means seeing results slowly, versus putting myself on a month-long or a year-long eating habit just to get results and then going back to the same old thing afterwards.
  • denisek80
    denisek80 Posts: 82 Member
    Options
    Thank you all so much for your insight :smile: you are all so right, it is a lifelong change, and just perseverance is I guess the key. It's good to know I'm not the only one that has been through this though and to see the successes you have still achieved!
  • DragonflyF15
    DragonflyF15 Posts: 437 Member
    Options
    I stopped trying to go the willpower route and instead found new behaviors to replace the old ones until the new behaviors became habit. I also think it's best to just take one behavior one week at a time rather than overwhelm yourself with changing everything. Logging in daily at first seemed alot of work, but now I have the system figured out both on the computer and via mobile apps that it goes fairly quickly and I think what we eat is just as important as in how many calories we consume. It's no longer a diet, but a shift in the mind that this is a lifestyle change! Good luck!