I need advice...

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Replies

  • mcshoelovin22
    mcshoelovin22 Posts: 263 Member
    Hang em by the balls!
  • betsz1
    betsz1 Posts: 81 Member
    I agree with you...and I have no advice. Oddly...I understood what you just said. I think you may be my sister from another mister... :huh:
  • NoExcusesAllProgress
    NoExcusesAllProgress Posts: 159 Member
    Always wipe front to back.
  • lglg11
    lglg11 Posts: 344 Member
    You really are a special snowflake . There is no one else in the world like you :flowerforyou:

    oh and it only hurts for a second , just stay relaxed :)
  • Ivey05131980
    Ivey05131980 Posts: 1,118 Member
    All right!
    Stop whatcha doin'
    'cause I'm about to ruin
    the image and the style that ya used to.
    I look funny,
    but yo I'm makin' money, see
    so yo world I hope you're ready for me.
    Now gather round
    I'm the new fool in town
    and my sound's laid down by the Underground.
    I drink up all the Hennessey ya got on ya shelf
    so just let me introduce myself
    My name is Humpty, pronounced with a Umpty.
    Yo ladies, oh how I like to hump thee.
    And all the rappers in the top ten--please allow me to bump thee.
    I'm steppin' tall, y'all,
    and just like Humpty Dumpty
    you're gonna fall when the stereos pump me.
    I like to rhyme,
    I like my beats funky,
    I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy.
    I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
    but sometimes I get ridiculous
    I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
    hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish?
    Yeah, I called ya fat.
    Look at me, I'm skinny
    It never stopped me from gettin' busy
    I'm a freak
    I like the girls with the boom
    I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
    I'm crazy.
    Allow me to amaze thee.
    They say I'm ugly but it just don't phase me.
    I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
    and I even got my own dance!

    The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, come on and do the Humpty Hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, just watch me do the Humpty Hump
    Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Humpty Hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
  • krithsai
    krithsai Posts: 668 Member
    You're completely right to be freaked out, but freaking out burns more calories, so don't forget to eat them back.
    Hahahahahha! This is the best piece of advice ever..like forever!
  • WadeLam
    WadeLam Posts: 224 Member
    Don't give up...you've GOT THIS!!! :happy:
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
    Agreed!
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    NOOOOOO I <3 your thigh gap, I want one too....
  • dodihere
    dodihere Posts: 490
    Dressing from the juniors department does make you look childish.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    m220125212.gif
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    When I get to feeling this way, I hug a kitten. It really shouldn't matter how much body hair you have or don't have. He should love you for you. Besides, braids are pretty.

    ^^^^ this

    and your body breaks the laws of physics so you can eat whatever tiny number of calories you like and do a cleanse and just defecate out all the subcutaneous fat from your body. and smoke raspberry ketones in a crack pipe.
  • BurtHuttz
    BurtHuttz Posts: 3,653 Member
    Dressing from the juniors department does make you look childish.

    She doesn't know what she's talking about. It makes you look like the hottest forbidden fruit ever!



    Helllooooooooooo, kitty!

    juniors-section.jpg
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    I think you need to post about it again, and then possibly put it on facebook. Please, after you've made this private thing seriously public, please come back here and tell us how awful it is that people are attacking you for making this personal thing public so that we can pat you on the head and tell you it's okay.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    Protip: Never do ATM.



    And since all of the other MFP memes have been used:


    THREE FLOYDS CAN KISS MY COLORADO LIVING *kitten*.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    Protip: Never do ATM.


    God, I love you.
  • drchimpanzee
    drchimpanzee Posts: 892 Member
    Just break up.
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
    Yes, you're right, you need to eat more bacon-that'll fix all your problems

    You had me at "bacon"

    Yes, anything bad can be fixed with bacon and anything good should be celebrated with bacon.

    As for your problem, don't worry... it's perfectly normal for that to happen. I looked it up on Wikipedia.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    Protip: Never do ATM.


    God, I love you.

    I love you too. And I will do anything for love.. but I won't do ATM.
  • halejr23
    halejr23 Posts: 294
    All right!
    Stop whatcha doin'
    'cause I'm about to ruin
    the image and the style that ya used to.
    I look funny,
    but yo I'm makin' money, see
    so yo world I hope you're ready for me.
    Now gather round
    I'm the new fool in town
    and my sound's laid down by the Underground.
    I drink up all the Hennessey ya got on ya shelf
    so just let me introduce myself
    My name is Humpty, pronounced with a Umpty.
    Yo ladies, oh how I like to hump thee.
    And all the rappers in the top ten--please allow me to bump thee.
    I'm steppin' tall, y'all,
    and just like Humpty Dumpty
    you're gonna fall when the stereos pump me.
    I like to rhyme,
    I like my beats funky,
    I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy.
    I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
    but sometimes I get ridiculous
    I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
    hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish?
    Yeah, I called ya fat.
    Look at me, I'm skinny
    It never stopped me from gettin' busy
    I'm a freak
    I like the girls with the boom
    I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
    I'm crazy.
    Allow me to amaze thee.
    They say I'm ugly but it just don't phase me.
    I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
    and I even got my own dance!

    The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, come on and do the Humpty Hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, just watch me do the Humpty Hump
    Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Humpty Hump
    Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump

    Suddenly I feel much better. I do believe THIS is the answer to the dilemma!
  • halejr23
    halejr23 Posts: 294
    Yes, drinking beer counts towards your daily consumption of water. I recommend 6-8 a day.
  • donteatmycookie
    donteatmycookie Posts: 21 Member
    Honey, if I were you, I'd wait until he was sleeping and I'd burn the house down.

    Kill you problems with fire. [End wisdom.]
  • Patovader
    Patovader Posts: 439 Member
    I think you need to eat back 75% of your exercise calories, but only on days ending with a 'y'
  • cuterbee
    cuterbee Posts: 545
    Protip: Never do ATM.


    God, I love you.

    But how will I get my money, then?
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Dressing from the juniors department does make you look childish.

    I've seen a few ladies do this and it really just depends on the clothes. Some stuff just make a mature women look immature. Jeans...psssshhhhh...no one can tell.
  • Nicks_scotland
    Nicks_scotland Posts: 77
    Not trying to be negative here but if your not in a calorie deficit, just break up.

    Actually laughing out loud! hhahah
  • MrGonzo05
    MrGonzo05 Posts: 1,120 Member
    Have you tried The Warrior Diet (TM)? You have a four hour feeding window and pretend you aren't hungry the rest of the day. It will surely solve your problem, whatever it is.
  • kelbax22
    kelbax22 Posts: 48 Member
    Just say yes. Always always yes. No regrets.
  • chocl8girl
    chocl8girl Posts: 1,968 Member
    Dieting is hard. Give up now.

    FJqh7.jpg
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
    get over it

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