Harder than I thought + Getting depressed

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mienfoo
mienfoo Posts: 15
in Motivation and Support
Hi everyone, I just wanted to comment on how my journey has gone so far and hopefully earn some encouragement because there are so many things troubling me at the moment.

I should start off by saying I'm 4'9'', female and 19 years old. I've been working out through all on January 4-5 times a week and switching between things like weight training and cardio etc.
I really do feel like nothing is changing for me. My body looks totally the same, I've eaten all the right things I'm supposed to so far and it just hurts. I get so bloody annoyed at myself for not reaching a 1200 calorie goal but here's the thing - I NEVER reach it!!!! I can never eat enough calories and usually stay in a 800-1000 range, and when I read all this stuff that says my body is going in attar starvation mode I just want to cry. I can't deal with how stressed reading that I'm doing things wrong or my body isn't responding correctly etc. I have read up that it is harder for short girls to lose weight and that just seems like the absolute truth.

The changes I have noticed in my body is stronger muscles and increases stamina. My chest, legs and waist are all the same though. I know I need to be patient but I just feelso discouraged and the fact that I'm not seeing the changes I want at this point when I've seen it so easily in other people depresses the hell out of me.

I had such a busy week with friends visiting and swaying away a little from my healthy routine has only saddened me further.

Sorry for the long ramble I just have absolutely no idea what to do. I feel so much more moody, having so much swings which isn't normal for me. And in response my hunger has totally shot up.

So that's it I guess. I just feel miserable and sad that my muscles are the only things growing, that my weight is seeming to stay the same, that no fat is coming off and that my original goal for at least 10/15lbs was may but now that seems so likely given that March is creeping around the corner

Thank you for reading, I would really appreciate any motivation I get. I'm just so upset.
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Replies

  • sugarlips1980
    sugarlips1980 Posts: 361 Member
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    Hey,

    Please don't get disheartened. I see you joined in December so we are talking about weeks that you've been doing this...you have to give it time! Plus you've not got a great deal to lose so it's bound to be slower. Slowly and surely is always best. If you've been at this for say 4 weeks, then that's a pound a week. It's not be sniffed at! I've been losing on average a pound a week. it all adds up. My pound a week has gotten me to 21 pounds now, woo!

    You're making lifestyle changes here, it's not a race. Try to embrace the healthy eating and exercise as something to ENJOY. And take your measurements too as it's not all about the scales. You're young, be healthy and enjoy yourself!!
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
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    Given your height, the usual 1200 recommendation is likely not correct ... Do not take everything you read here are truth for all, there are some variabilities.

    It will be harder for you and likely your calorie deficit through exercise is also lower. But stick to it, you'll make it.

    Learn and adjust. And don't stress it.
  • Mmmporkrinds
    Mmmporkrinds Posts: 192
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    Hello! Don't worry too much, it does sound that you're doing the right things. If you're not eating 1200 cals a day and find this distresses you then maybe find ways to get there, if you're doing exercise your body does need the food. Congrats on your efforts, if you are finding your muscles developing then you're doing something right (and muscle weighs more than fat so that's why the scales might not be moving). Says a non-expert!! Best of luck :-)
  • toomuchbootyindapants
    toomuchbootyindapants Posts: 811 Member
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    Uhm, you're eating 800-1000 cals a day and you're moody? That's not surprising. And you haven't noticed many changes because you aren't eating enough. And believe me, your muscles are *not* growing if you are eating so little (you can only grow muscle while eating in a surplus - MORE than what your body burns a day).

    I strongly encourage you to increase your calories - start by reading this thread:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    If you find it hard to eat more - then choose more calorically dense foods (peanut butter is EASY as there are 210 cals in two tablespoons - and a "measured out and weighed in grams" tablespoon is very different than an eyed tablespoon. Include healthy fats - do not fear the fat!

    Keep working out but don't over do it. You can workout three days a week and see results. If four or five days makes you feel good, then great, but remember you need to be eating enough. Aim for one pound lost a week - which means MFP will set you at a higher baseline calories and then you can eat those exercise calories earned back. I guarantee you'll see changes within a week or two of increasing your calories.
  • stuntpilot51
    stuntpilot51 Posts: 53 Member
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    Uhm, you're eating 800-1000 cals a day and you're moody? That's not surprising. And you haven't noticed many changes because you aren't eating enough. And believe me, your muscles are *not* growing if you are eating so little (you can only grow muscle while eating in a surplus - MORE than what your body burns a day).

    I strongly encourage you to increase your calories - start by reading this thread:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    If you find it hard to eat more - then choose more calorically dense foods (peanut butter is EASY as there are 210 cals in two tablespoons - and a "measured out and weighed in grams" tablespoon is very different than an eyed tablespoon. Include healthy fats - do not fear the fat!

    Keep working out but don't over do it. You can workout three days a week and see results. If four or five days makes you feel good, then great, but remember you need to be eating enough. Aim for one pound lost a week - which means MFP will set you at a higher baseline calories and then you can eat those exercise calories earned back. I guarantee you'll see changes within a week or two of increasing your calories.



    Read this.
  • sarahmania
    sarahmania Posts: 16 Member
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    Hi sweatheart no wonder you are depressed. You are not eating enough and starving yourself. Inorder to be fit, strong and healthy you must be kinder to your body and set realistic eating goals that will work with you and make you happy.
    Don't know any more about you but suggest you search for the inplace of a road map link and start from there. If you can't eat enough calories try splitting your meals up into more manageable sizes and eating more of them through the day. My heart goes out to you, I've been there and it's horrible, but please don't give up on yourself.
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    Uhm, you're eating 800-1000 cals a day and you're moody? That's not surprising. And you haven't noticed many changes because you aren't eating enough. And believe me, your muscles are *not* growing if you are eating so little (you can only grow muscle while eating in a surplus - MORE than what your body burns a day).

    I strongly encourage you to increase your calories - start by reading this thread:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    If you find it hard to eat more - then choose more calorically dense foods (peanut butter is EASY as there are 210 cals in two tablespoons - and a "measured out and weighed in grams" tablespoon is very different than an eyed tablespoon. Include healthy fats - do not fear the fat!

    Keep working out but don't over do it. You can workout three days a week and see results. If four or five days makes you feel good, then great, but remember you need to be eating enough. Aim for one pound lost a week - which means MFP will set you at a higher baseline calories and then you can eat those exercise calories earned back. I guarantee you'll see changes within a week or two of increasing your calories.

    Thank you for the advice, I really do appreciate it, but I'm obliged to disagree. My muscles are growing, I've got a LOT more strength and stamina than I've ever had. The muscles on my legs feel incredibly strong, these are physical changes I know I am feeling. Running no longer feels painful as well.

    I think 800 was a bit of an underestimate. My main point is that by calorie counting I never seem to reach 1200. But I'll follow your advice and appreciate the input!
  • 88meli88
    88meli88 Posts: 238 Member
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    You are starving your body. You are eating the same amount of food as is recommended for my 3 year old son. Your body is holding ont everything it has, to keep you basic organs functioning. It probably has no fuel for your work outs. So you are hungry, tired, and moody. This is likely to lead to overeating at one point. I think w this approach, you are unlikely to lose weight and even more unlikely to add muscle. Read the roadmap above and listen to Fat 2 Fit radio podcasts (http://www.fat2fitradio.com/) to try a different approach. They also have a number of calculators on their websites which will help you figure out the basic number of calories to eat - you should nto eat under your BMR...

    Feel free to add me and I am happy to help you do the calculations.
  • toomuchbootyindapants
    toomuchbootyindapants Posts: 811 Member
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    You are NOT growing muscle while eating so low. I promise you. I guarantee you. You may feel stronger and tighter but you are NOT growing muscle. There is a BIG difference between growing muscle and having them feel tight and strong from being used more. It takes a SURPLUS of calories to build new muscle, or even eating at maintenance if you are overweight and a new lifter. But it is physically impossible to grow new muscle while eating 1000 calories (or even 1200) a day. Sorry to break it to ya!
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    Thank you all for the help so far. I'm sorry I sound like a nightmare but it feels so much better talking about how I'm feeling. I just really don't understand how I'm starving my body when I'm only responding to my body when it is hungry. I checked like back and forth between loads of healthy eating sites and ensuring my routine was healthy (low carb+whole grain+lots if veggies+healthy snacks through the day) so when people tell me I'm actually starving myself for not hitting the 1200 mark leaves me feeling confused and upset. If its what I need to do I will do it, it's just hard :( I'm not used to eating so many calories in a day. Do height and gender affect it? Given I'm under 5ft I would have thought different
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    You are starving your body. You are eating the same amount of food as is recommended for my 3 year old son. Your body is holding ont everything it has, to keep you basic organs functioning. It probably has no fuel for your work outs. So you are hungry, tired, and moody. This is likely to lead to overeating at one point. I think w this approach, you are unlikely to lose weight and even more unlikely to add muscle. Read the roadmap above and listen to Fat 2 Fit radio podcasts (http://www.fat2fitradio.com/) to try a different approach. They also have a number of calculators on their websites which will help you figure out the basic number of calories to eat - you should nto eat under your BMR...

    Feel free to add me and I am happy to help you do the calculations.

    Um.....okay right, so I understand you're telling me I've basically done it wrong. I just want to know how to do it right.
  • wwmorrow
    wwmorrow Posts: 118 Member
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    It doesn't matter how short the person is...800-1000 calories is too low! So, that's problem #1. And, if she's exercising and burning some of those and not eating them back, her body may be starving. Also, this person said they only wanted to lose 10-15 pounds, so that means she probably has very little to lose and that would be problem #2. (wish I had that problem!!)
  • toomuchbootyindapants
    toomuchbootyindapants Posts: 811 Member
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    You are doing it wrong and if you want to continue to argue with others about it, no one is going to want to help you. Obviously your way isn't working...so you can keep on doing what you're doing and getting the same results, or try something new. Good luck!
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    You are NOT growing muscle while eating so low. I promise you. I guarantee you. You may feel stronger and tighter but you are NOT growing muscle. There is a BIG difference between growing muscle and having them feel tight and strong from being used more. It takes a SURPLUS of calories to build new muscle, or even eating at maintenance if you are overweight and a new lifter. But it is physically impossible to grow new muscle while eating 1000 calories (or even 1200) a day. Sorry to break it to ya!

    Okay...that makes sense. At least I thought I was doing *something* right but apparently not :(
  • Minerva624
    Minerva624 Posts: 577 Member
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    Just remember, there are people out there who do not have the privilege to improve their body due to ill health or lack of freedom. But you have the great freedom and privilege to make yourself the best you can be. Don't give up and fight harder for the body you desire. I'm having the same trouble with meeting my daily calories due to my insomnia and sometimes I get depressed because of it. Nothing worthwhile comes easy. Now you know what you have to do to improve so take that knowledge by the hand and lead yourself to where you want to go. :)
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    I'm really sorry!!! I'm not trying to argue, I'm just a bit upset, like I said. I'm sorry. I really don't mean to argue.
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    You are doing it wrong and if you want to continue to argue with others about it, no one is going to want to help you. Obviously your way isn't working...so you can keep on doing what you're doing and getting the same results, or try something new. Good luck!

    Wow I'm sorry but what is the need to sound so patronising? I'm just really upset, I'm sure just about everyone has been on the same struggle of being unhappy with their body and wanting to make a change for the better :(

    I really don't like the way you have just told me "Yep, you're doing it wrong" and not given me any advice. Ill change my routine if j know what to do! It's all I want, it's why I came here in the first place, to feel encouraged and optimistic and happy, but seriously starting to feel the opposite :(
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,735 Member
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    You are NOT growing muscle while eating so low. I promise you. I guarantee you. You may feel stronger and tighter but you are NOT growing muscle. There is a BIG difference between growing muscle and having them feel tight and strong from being used more. It takes a SURPLUS of calories to build new muscle, or even eating at maintenance if you are overweight and a new lifter. But it is physically impossible to grow new muscle while eating 1000 calories (or even 1200) a day. Sorry to break it to ya!

    adding this to support your assertions,

    http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/muscle-gain/muscle-gain-mistakes.html

    "The simple physiological fact is that, to gain muscle, you have to provide not only the proper training stimulus, but also the building blocks for the new tissue. This means not only sufficient protein (see below) but also sufficient calories and energy. While it’s wonderful to hope that the energy to build new muscle will be pulled out of fat cells, the reality is that this rarely happens (there are some odd exceptions such as folks beginning a program, and those returning from a layoff)."
  • Markguns
    Markguns Posts: 554 Member
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    Are you talking about Net calories, or just your calorie goal of 1200 a day. If you are talking net then don't sweat it so much. I only eat back about 1/2 of my exercise calories. If you need to eat more and don't feel hungry enough try having a protein shake with a meal, as well as after workouts. Try rice, pasta, potatoes, beans, peanut butter, nuts, avocados, :wink: Do more cardio, less weights to lose fat. (do weights in a quick circuit, keep you HR at 65%-80% of max in your workouts) Don't get discouraged it takes time. I didn't lose any weight for 2-3 weeks when I first started. Weigh yourself only once or twice a week, it fluctuates daily. Insert the "Hang in There Baby" cat photo here... :bigsmile:
  • mienfoo
    mienfoo Posts: 15
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    Just remember, there are people out there who do not have the privilege to improve their body due to ill health or lack of freedom. But you have the great freedom and privilege to make yourself the best you can be. Don't give up and fight harder for the body you desire. I'm having the same trouble with meeting my daily calories due to my insomnia and sometimes I get depressed because of it. Nothing worthwhile comes easy. Now you know what you have to do to improve so take that knowledge by the hand and lead yourself to where you want to go. :)

    I'm so sorry to hear about your insomnia, thank you very much for your kind words! I'll work hard :) xx

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