weight & finances! out of control!!!!

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FeistyKitty808
FeistyKitty808 Posts: 53 Member
in Motivation and Support
Anybody able to recommend good book on learning how to control my impulses? Overeating & spending seem to be a shortcoming for me. We have budgeted calories and we have budgeted finances, I am aware of what my limits are, but I seem to just ignore them. Needless to say this gets me into trouble both with my weight and with my finances! I think pooring myself into some inspirational reading to help me understand why I keep doing this to myself might help me out. Thoughts?

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  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Have you considered seeing a counselor for this?
  • BreannaJohnson1030
    BreannaJohnson1030 Posts: 25 Member
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    I have the same problems i pretty much do what i want and find it hard to eat under your calories if you are always on the go!!i just cant get the right balance down!!!!!!!!!!
  • Denise1224
    Denise1224 Posts: 150 Member
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    Have you considered seeing a counselor for this?

    ^^ This ... seems to me there is more going on than just an impulse / control thing... could be depression related (I'm no professional mind you) but I know when I am depressed I tend to eat more spend more and essentially have an I don't care mentality for the time that I'm down... Counseling could help you figure out the why so you can maybe control it better Good luck!
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
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    Seeing a counselor would be a good idea. Sometimes it comes down to picking one first. If it comes down to weight or finances, you should probably look at finances. Try to get that straight, and then try to tackle the weight.

    When I was trying to get pregnant, I also needed to lose weight, but the stress of it all was so much that I had to choose one to work on first. Since I wasn't getting any younger, trying to get pregnant won. Of course, I still didn't want to deal with my weight until April 2011 - when I went to go to an event at my daughter's school and could hardly walk to the front door - had to stop several times along the way, and once inside, had to sit down on the floor and was so embarrassed because I had to catch my breath and people had to go around me. BUT I still had my moment, and 2 year anniversary from starting on this path is coming up this April.

    I do like the book "Battlefield of the Mind" by Joyce Meyer.

    For what it's worth, and good luck.
  • deannajf4
    deannajf4 Posts: 223 Member
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    We got our finances in control through a course by Dave Ramsey called "Financial Peace University" you can google it. He is Christian, but his message isn't saturated with the Christian message, rather some good principals and how to live it out.

    Anyway, we were in a desperate situation with money until we took his course, then we learned about debt, budgeting etc. and it saved us financially!! It took many more years before we actually made enough to get ahead, but in the mean /lean times we weren't getting deeper into debt - which is a life saver!! Check it out - life changing for sure!

    Deanna
  • llpaq
    llpaq Posts: 263 Member
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    Anybody able to recommend good book on learning how to control my impulses? Overeating & spending seem to be a shortcoming for me. We have budgeted calories and we have budgeted finances, I am aware of what my limits are, but I seem to just ignore them. Needless to say this gets me into trouble both with my weight and with my finances! I think pooring myself into some inspirational reading to help me understand why I keep doing this to myself might help me out. Thoughts?

    I was TOTALLY the same way but as strange as this may sound..... my working out has helped my spending. I used to kind of live reckless when it came to my finances, ok, not kind of- I did- until about 5 months ago. Since I have been in total control of my calories and my "body" even when other things in life seem a bit crazy, working out has been my one thing I TOTALLY control and I've used that control. NOW because I only buy things as rewards- if I do 25 miles this week, I'll get the new picture. If I workout everyday for a month I get ONE new bag. I would say tackle one thing at a time.......don't try to tackle both at once- that's a lot to take on. Good Luck to you and Best wishes :flowerforyou:
  • HeatherSanto
    HeatherSanto Posts: 138 Member
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    I just started Financial Peace University too. That will teach you discipline. As for the weight limits, you may really enjoy this article on Calorie budgeting like financial budgeting. http://santofitlife.com/calorie-wallet/
  • mfoy94
    mfoy94 Posts: 228 Member
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    If you cant motivate yourself enough to figure it out then I am not sure how anyone on this website can say anything that will help you.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
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    I would say I can relater, but I don't see it as a problem, my bills get paid, there is always food on the table, no one in my family goes without but I tend to shop more than I save.
  • mdcjmom
    mdcjmom Posts: 597 Member
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    As far as finances take Dave Ramseys course on finances. It is called Financial Peace University it is really helping me change the way I think about my money. And this site has been the best tool for me with my calories.
  • witeowl
    witeowl Posts: 89
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    This may or may not be applicable in your case, but I'm currently reading The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. It's actually pretty amazing how much our lives are impacted by habit. The tough part, of course, is figuring out how to effectively change our habits, but Duhigg shows that it's not just a matter of will power, but a matter of sandwiching new behaviors between the stimulus and the reward. For example, it explains why I haven't even been thinking about stopping by a drive-through since bringing green smoothies for the drive home. (Stimulus: Get in car and start drive home. Routine: Drink green smoothie instead of stopping to get junk. Reward: Busy hands during the drive and a full belly at home.) Seriously. Trading In-n-Out for a green smoothie??? But it works!

    Interesting reading, too.
  • gdrmuzak
    gdrmuzak Posts: 103 Member
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    Read Dave Ramsey's book THE TOTAL MONEY MAKEOVER and I'd agree with the others go thru FPU, Financial Peace University. He's also on the hundreds of local radio stations and part of his show is podcast thru iTunes.

    Some that go thru FPU will also see significant issues in other life areas also addressed as people learn to take control of their finances (issues like weight, diet, exercise, self-discipline/control, relationships, boundaries, etc.)
  • Kellyeee2013
    Kellyeee2013 Posts: 221
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    Have you tried journaling? Try keeping track of thoughts and mood when you have urges to over induldge. Counselling may be beneficial too.
  • bemusic
    bemusic Posts: 12 Member
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    Do you have others on here who you know see your eating habits? Sometimes just knowing that someone else can see makes the difference. Dave Ramsey FPU is amazing for spending. (sadly, it's expensive in itself.) I have a friend who is a life coach and she is amazing at motivating. Amazing what you can get through with the right mindset! I can give her your name if you are interested in one-on-one coaching.
  • tinafb1973
    tinafb1973 Posts: 1
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    Those are my 2 vices as well. I have been in Celebrate Recovery for several years dealing with co-dependency and partner of a recovering addict. Just as someone might use alcohol, drugs or sex as a way to deal with life I use food and spending. Especially if I am on the hunt for a good deal. For me I lack discipline. We have a saying HALT- hungry, angry lonely, tired. That is usually when the urge to use is harder. Thats when someone you trust and will be honest with you gets a call or text from YOU. The Dave Ramsey course helped as long as you work the program- like any program what you put in is what you get out. For me Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend books and materials have helped. I am currently enrolled in their webinar 12 Life Skills You Need to Succeed. So far we have discussed 2 topics- one problem solving and last week goal setting. As you can imagine losing weight and my finances are just 2 of my main goals and I am currently breaking them down into smaller sub goals that are SMART specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time based. I just started this today. Actually counting my calories for the first time in awhile. My behaviors will show whether the program will work. Hope this helps
  • doitforabby
    doitforabby Posts: 137 Member
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    I've heard great things about Dave Ramsey as well, but no personal experience. I have had overspending tendancies ($) in the past too, and still do sometimes - I definately spend more than save. I have (obviously) had the same issue with my weight as well - I don't know how, and I know this sounds totally cliche but this time, it just 'clicked'.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,841 Member
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    Have you considered seeing a counselor for this?

    ^^ This ... seems to me there is more going on than just an impulse / control thing... could be depression related (I'm no professional mind you) but I know when I am depressed I tend to eat more spend more and essentially have an I don't care mentality for the time that I'm down... Counseling could help you figure out the why so you can maybe control it better Good luck!

    All this.

    I tend to lose self-control when I am depressed as well. There is a need to feel a preceived emptiness with something preceived as fullfilling. I've come to deal with it better over the years and am getting much better at dicipline. Good luck.
  • fitgirl4x48
    fitgirl4x48 Posts: 30 Member
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    I found that when I didn't have control of things is usually when I felt obligated to them. I happily admit that I often have traits of Oppositional Defiant disorder aka: Don't tell me what to do! You can ask, but don't tell me. The restrictions of calories, and finances don't bother me in the least, but if a rookie tells me how to do my job -the person learns tout-de-suite not to demand things from this goddess, but instead to politely ask. You will get anything that way.

    So I started treating myself that way too. I would say to myself: Listen, I know you don't want to follow this clean eating, you want the pizza, but hey - I want to run that 5K, so how about you get the pizza once a week? Well my inner diva loved this & soon I was negotiating with myself about everything, and pretty soon I learned how to take control of my own self. Gently. It's been a good ride :)

    Yes, it sounds so weird, but hey - it's working for me.

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