Dealing with Emotion, Not Eating It!

jesslintch
jesslintch Posts: 63 Member
in Motivation and Support
My new way of living has been going well. I expect to hit the 25 lb down mark this week. But this morning was a doozie.

My week has been rough. My cousin is in trouble . . . again. My grandfather was in the hospital with leg swelling because of his kidneys . . . again. My mother is having a lumpectomy and getting ready to start radiation. I have a sinus infection. All this comes on top of my normal life. Being a Reading Specialist for high school freshmen who can’t read makes me want to bang my head through my laptop. Money is tight. My toddler never seems happy to see me lately.

So this morning, I had to stop for sinus medicine at a grocery store near school. It is the same store where I used to stop for my after school snack. By “snack” I mean 4 eclairs, an order of chicken strips, some wedge fries, or a Stromboli (or any combination of the four). This route also took me by the Dunkin Donuts where I used to stop for the most sugary, frothy coffee on the menu and a half dozen donuts. I always hoped the guy at the window saw my school parking pass and figured the donuts were for my students. I even used to drop a comment about them occasionally, but the donuts were gone before the homeroom bell rang.

So I’m asking myself, shouldn’t I feel proud? Shouldn’t I be shouting my NSV from the rooftop? I resisted, woo hoo. . . blech. Instead, I feel like crunching the numbers in my bank account to see if I can run to Sheetz for lunch.

I WON’T!!! I know I deserve better than that. But, for all you former emotional eaters, does it ever get easier?

Replies

  • CherishQuick
    CherishQuick Posts: 145
    Hey....I'd like to applaud you today. You've got a lot going on. I went down a similar "bad" path this summer and packed on about 25 pounds. i'm still trying to get it off. Each day without making it a "candy" day or eating some chip/salty thing is a victory. My kidletts sometimes are indifferent to me too. I think they can sense when we are struggling. Hang in there. I'll keep you posted if I find some viable solutions.
  • Scrappymom67
    Scrappymom67 Posts: 15 Member
    I am en emotional eater as well . . . sadness, anxiety, joy, boredom . .. all of these triggers fire up my cravings. Weekends are the worst for me - I do much better with a set schedule, out of the house.

    I try to remind myself that eating something that I KNOW moves me FURTHER AWAY from my goal (health and beauty) doesn't pay my bills, reduce my sales goals, or smooth out a family crisis. They are totally unconnected. But I get what you mean about the act of staying disciplined is completely exhausting sometimes. You are not alone!
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    Crunch the numbers in your bank account, then treat yourself to something nice that isn't food.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
    Crunch the numbers in your bank account, then treat yourself to something nice that isn't food.

    This.

    And in answer to your question, yes it does get easier (it did for me anyway). The longer I persevered the easier it got. I still crack every now and then, but the important thing is picking yourself up and starting again rather than hating yourself.

    And yes, you should be shouting your NSV from the rooftops.
  • bathsheba_c
    bathsheba_c Posts: 1,873 Member
    I stop eating when I am unhappy, so I might be able to give some support. Hang in there! It's tough to have willpower when you are using all of your mental energy on other troubles. Find other ways to reward yourself for slogging through it all: a hot bath, a short massage, whatever seems indulgent but fits into your budget.

    As for your toddler, keep in mind that children go through stages of "needing mommy" and "needing to get away from mommy." It's part of the process of eventually becoming an independent adult. Remind yourself that it's nothing personal.
  • sunnyskyjb
    sunnyskyjb Posts: 258 Member
    Great posts and good job. everyone.
  • Mjhnbgff
    Mjhnbgff Posts: 112
    You should be proud! I am a recovering bulimic and after years of therapy, I can say that it does get easier. It takes a lot of work but it is possible. I have finally been able to change my relationship with food. It wasn't easy and I spent the last 3 years in cognitive behavior therapy, but I have finally done it.

    Food is not your best friend or your source of entertainment/pleasure/comfort/whatever. It's just food. Sure, I like food that tastes good but it was amazing how once my relationship with food changed, I didn't get the same enjoyment out of eating anymore. I don't really miss the taste of food because for me, food was more about entertainment and comfort. A turkey sandwich tastes just as good to me as pizza or fried chicken did, but this time, I don't have any guilt afterwards. That feeling to me is worth so much more than the momentary pleasure and comfort of fried chicken.

    It wasn't until I changed my relationship with food that I was finally able to lose weight. The way I'm eating now is pretty much the way I will eat for the rest of my life. I don't feel deprived because my relationship with food has changed, but I'm not sure that I can ever have a treat every now and then because of my history.
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  • conniehv40
    conniehv40 Posts: 442 Member
    Dealing with emotion and stress is what keeps us all logging! You can do this!

    YES, you should be proud-Are you kidding me? Never feel anything less than proud! You made huge changes in your life!

    DO NOT go and eat emotionally today. It just ruins your emotions! It truly does! Eating will not make you feel better tomorrow, it will make you feel worse.

    Treat yourself to new nail polish or something instead! : )

    Please post later how you did. There is too much on your plate today, but you have the strength to do sit ups to get your frustration, sadness and worry out, not eating bad choices.
  • Roderunr
    Roderunr Posts: 65 Member
    You should shout this accomplishment from the roof-tops!! You are well on your way to a better, healthier you by the choices you make! I too, am an emotional eater...binger...and "convenient" drive-thru(er)! These places which we think will comfort us in the moment, actually make us miserable in the long run!

    You are awesome! I am proud of you & I feel the need to follow in your footsteps! Thank you Jess!!
  • Mamalea32
    Mamalea32 Posts: 134
    I am also an emotional eater, but I'm 116 lbs. I binge when I'm lonely then I restrict or worse-- purge. It is embarassing, but I can relate to your feelings of loss of control. I often spend time thinking about food and worrying about losing control of myself and having to suffer afterwards. I don't know if it gets easier, but how awesome that there are people in the world that we can relate to and empathize with. Talking and "posting" seems like a good place to begin finding a support system. Though I replied to you to offer support I am telling you: Thanks for reaching out, because you just helped me a bit!
    I hope you feel good knowing that you helped a total stranger.
  • jesslintch
    jesslintch Posts: 63 Member
    I'd like to thank everyone for your support. Your suggestions have been great and it helps just to know that I'm not the only one who deals with these feelings. Here is the plan:
    1. I made a lunch date with a coworker who always packs lunch so I don't have time to run to Sheetz.
    2. I let my husband know that I'll be home late because I'm going to yoga.
    3. I'm stopping by the store to get the makings for a detox bath. I'll relax and knock some of the cold out of my system.
    4. I crunched numbers and made an appointment for a professional haircut Friday. It is a luxury that has gone by the wayside since we became a one income family.
  • CherishQuick
    CherishQuick Posts: 145
    I'm a classic emotional eater....if there was a picture in a textbook of emotional eating, it would be of me.

    Does it get easier? Well...yes, but only if you do the work. You have to battle your mind in those times when you know you only want to eat for comfort. You did a great example of it in not going to those staple places where you get your "food fix." The more you do it, the more it becomes part of your norm.

    I'm gonna be honest with you though...when you are in those stressed and emotionally draining times...at least for me...the cravings and wanting to binge are always going to be there. You just become much much better at dealing with them. What also helps is to replace food with something else that helps or takes the edge off your "I want food and I want it now" feelings.

    I have a whole laundry list of things I can do in place of food. First thing...and this is a must for me...is that I make it a RULE I cannot eat any of those trigger or "happy" foods when I am angry, stressed, sad, etc. Nope. Not an option. If I am feeling A OK fine....I can have pizza no problem. If my day just turned into crapola...nope, can't have pizza.....not an option.....off limits.

    I never thought I'd be one of these people....but moving or working out...really helps. I had a hugely stressful day at work. It was crazy town. I had a client screaming at me....and then a million things to do and no time to do it. I was a walking BALL OF STRESS. I wanted to fall into a plate of cupcakes....that what my brain said to do. However, during my lunch break....I got my workout clothes and ran on the treadmill for 30 minutes. I felt SO much better...and the rest of the day was still stressful, but it was manageable. Also, it made me feel victorious....and that helped me get through the rest of the day.

    Hugs...and best of luck on your journey! Yesterday...you made a huge step in the war...you won a battle...and with each battle it gets just a smidge easier!
    I really like your suggestions. Especially about not eatin those "happy" foods when stressed. I am totally taking that advice starting in the morning! Lunchtime workouts are sometimes difficult but I can commit to walking around for 20 minutes instead of slaving away at my ----ing computer all lunch! Yaay. thank you
  • DeanR321
    DeanR321 Posts: 57 Member
    Keep strong and tell your self no you dont want to eat the unhealthy foods no more its time for that change that you have already started and to see it through for life....

    you can do this but it never is easy, if it was then everyone would do it but for those who do it and stick to it, thats what you call dedication, i hope it gets better for you.

    remember we have these hurdles in front of us to stop us in our new tracks but if we jump over them and carry on we feel better for it and even more have a healthier body and life style....

    IT WILL GET EASIER AS YOU GO ON TRUST ME... IT ALWAYS DOES.

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