Hi I am new and this is my story...

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Hi, I am fairly new to mfp. This is my story, sorry if I am a little long winded. :) My brother passed away a couple of years ago after a short but painful battle with cancer. He was my best friend and it was the hardest time of my life. I began gaining pounds while going to hospital after hospital sleeping in weighting rooms next to vending machines scared to death of losing my dear brother. I would find myself eating in the hospital cafeteria in the middle of the night as an escape. After he passed away I was so down, and so busy after just delivering twins and having a 2 year old as well. My brother left behind a 2 year old and a 5 week old. So life was crazy for awhile and I did not lose the weight. Then the next year my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. And the nightmare began again. What did I do? I turned to food. I traveled with my dad to all the appointments and ended up living in another state for 5 weeks with him at a hospital while he underwent a clinical trial. So I was living away from my husband and 3 little children for the first time ever. I aslo was dealing with so much stress as I watched my dad suffer through a treatment that they only gave him a 50% of surviving the actual treatment and only for a small chance that it would even work afterwards. So I ended up once again hitting vending machines and cafeterias at the hospital I was living at just to escape the room and the stress as I watched and prayed my dad would get through the treatment. While we were there we received a call that my Grandmother (who raised me and was basically my mother) had a heart attack and died. So I had to fly home and bury her, the only person I had left at that point that did not have cancer had just died and left me. :( To make it even worse I had to go into a hospital room where my sick dad was fighting for his life and tell him that his mother whom he lived with had just died. My brother and dad's cancer had been too much on her heart. So once again I was beyond greif stricken and ate more and more. Hundereds of people brought comfort food in the time of her passing. The first 3 days I couldn't eat at all. I think I was in shock. After that i began eating whenver I would feel like crying..A few weeks ago I looked in the mirror and didn't even recognize who I was. I am now the heaviest I have ever been, even heavier than I was at full term with my twin pregnancy. It finally clicked that this is not what I want for my children, my husband or myself. So I got an elipitical, trashed all my junk food and have done really really well the past 2 weeks. I know that my brother would not want me to be unhealthy. He would want me to be here for as long as possible. I promised him on his deathbed that I would always watch out for his little girls. So that promise is helping me stay motivated. I must be healthy so I can be around to not only watch my 3 precious children grow up but also his. I am working very hard to teach my children not to be emotinal eaters. They are very healthy and active. All are in sports and live off fruits and veggies. :) Its funny, I made sure from day one that they only eat a clean organic diet but I was eating horribly. I gave them water but then I would drink sodas. I now realize that as they get older I must not only tell them how to live but I should show them with my example. Sorry this is so long... I would love some friends if anyone would like to add me. I am 34 years old and have 70 pds to lose and I am trying very hard to overcome emotional eating.

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  • Well you are quite welcome to have a friend in me.... I lost my step father to cancer in november after a very short battle. I hope you feel that you can overcome this and make a life for you and your children and you brothers too xx
  • junebaby21
    junebaby21 Posts: 260 Member
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    I don't have any kids and I can't relate to your story, except that I am trying to lose weight as well. Friend request sent!
  • tlkrallman
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    Feel free to add me!
  • di1428
    di1428 Posts: 165 Member
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    welcome here and hope you find the support you're looking for.
    feel free to add me :)
  • MG_Fit
    MG_Fit Posts: 1,143 Member
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    First, for whatever it's worth, I truly am sorry for your losses. Honestly if that were me I don't know what I'd do. But we're glad that you're here and if you need any support feel free to add me.
  • jmcveigh12345
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    Hi there. May i first say that i am truly sorry for your losses. Ive only been on here a week but i feel so much better about myself...feel so much more awake and alert. I saw a picture that was taken of me recently and i was just like...yeah i need to change. Become more healthier....choose healthier options...get my butt off the couch :)! I love mfp...cant go a day without being on here, There ar so many people that are helping and supporting me...and i am doing the same. So feel free to add me...and we can beat this together :) xx
  • nczuczu
    nczuczu Posts: 611 Member
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    I am sorry to hear about your loss. Life can be really difficult and there can be so many roadblocks and obstacles along the way. My dad passed away 14 years ago, so I know the pain. It sounds like you are know that you cannot continue in the path that you have and your MFP friends will help support you along the way. You can be proud of what you have accomplished so far and the lessons that you are teaching your children. Congrats on joining MFP and by honestly tracking your food and exercise, I know you will reach your goals. I'm sending you a friend request. I would like to support you as you transform yourself!
  • l2013k
    l2013k Posts: 18 Member
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    Hi, Feel free to add me.
    I have lost my dad and I know I am definately an emotional eater. Good Luck, lets get healthy
  • KathyPBiles
    KathyPBiles Posts: 292 Member
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    Welcome! You will receive great support here. Please feel free to add me. I am quite a bit older, but I will be glad to be part of your support team!
  • aka1030
    aka1030 Posts: 15 Member
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    I'm truly sorry for the passing of your family members. In my opinion, your attitude to getting healthy again is the first and biggest step to this journey and the second step is joined MFP - it has been a huge help to me over the last couple weeks since I joined. I'm 30 and trying to lose about the same amount of weight. I'll send you a friend add.
  • KEAVES13
    KEAVES13 Posts: 90 Member
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    I lost my brother 4 years ago to brain cancer and am just now taking control of my life and losing the weight..would love to have supportive friends on here..I'll add you :happy:
  • CaddieMay
    CaddieMay Posts: 356 Member
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    Wow, you have been through the wringer! So sorry for your losses. Friend request sent!
  • angelasowdon
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    Wow - the hardest thing is to recognise that what we do is harming us - well done you - now its just a case of re-training your mind and body - you have such fantastic strength you just don't realise yet that its your strength for you too, not just others. So pull the socks up as they say - and you will achieve just what you set out too. Very best of success and keep going - odd moments will come and go, just dust off and carry on... remember every day is a new day and a new start, every day is a day that will make a difference one way or another, just tick the days off, and keep moving forward.xx
  • Jalna60
    Jalna60 Posts: 1 Member
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    Please feel free to add me, I am so sorry for your loss. I too have gone through some bad times, but life goes on, and I had to take stock of everything. So first things first, I took a long look in the mirror and saw a huge blob staring at me, things had GOT to change. I have only been doing this for a month and have lost 15 pounds, amazing lol!, but already I feel so much better about myself, I am really enjoying the food I am eating, and also feel in control of my life in a very long time. I have tried "diets" before and lost interest. Very quickly, but this fitness plan is very easy and makes working out the calories simple. So you go for it, and be on top of the world. All the best, Jo xx
  • GottaHavePav
    GottaHavePav Posts: 22 Member
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    I'm sorry for your loss too! You can do this!
  • Urcook
    Urcook Posts: 1 Member
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    Wow, you have had a hard year! I have my problems but realized that I don't need to make things worse by being unhealthy.I too just started and have 40 pounds to lose. I do not want to become diabetic which is the road I am headed for.
    I would like very much to take this journey with you if you like.
  • leahk80
    leahk80 Posts: 114 Member
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    Hi, i lost my mother to lung cancer and it really crushed me.. i have a hard time processing things and i tend to hold things in and i turned to food as i've always had in the past and now i just can't lose the weight. But i believe with support that we can do anything. you can friend me if you like and we can do this together!
  • Roni_M
    Roni_M Posts: 717 Member
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    I lost my grandmother to cancer and know exactly how hard those last few weeks are! The mixed emotions of wanting their suffering to end but not wanting to let them go is very confusing and overwhelming. I'm so sorry you had to experience that twice. My grandfather also passed away a couple of years ago but his illness was relatively short and painless (dementia followed by a stroke). Not that he wasn't loved and missed when he passed, it's just a completely different beast when someone you love is in pain every day for weeks on end and you feel so helpless.

    I'm happy that you are trying to be a good example for your kids and nieces. You can do this. Don't get caught up in all the debateable stuff. Keep it simple, take it slow and steady and you will get there. Patience and persistence are the most important parts of being successful.

    Feel free to add me!