put off my a number?

ISABELCOADY55
ISABELCOADY55 Posts: 113 Member
in Chit-Chat
would you be put off dating someone if you knew how many people they had slept with?

if so, at what number would you draw the line?

Replies

  • SakuraRose13
    SakuraRose13 Posts: 621 Member
    Doest matter to me it only matters if they are sleeping with others while they are with me.Im married though so dont have to worry about that anymore I dont miss bieng single,it took me awhile to find the one.

    Number is a number all I ever wanted to know is if they had had sex because I refused to be thier first unless we were in love.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    I believe in don't ask, don't tell.
  • lovelyMYlovely
    lovelyMYlovely Posts: 1,066 Member
    i decided that im going to take the person to a STD clinic before i sleep with them, because i havent been with many people (i could count with one hand) and i dont want to catch anything.. so the next guy who sleeps with me be prepaired to get blood work lol... people are dirty these days... seriously.. lol..

    yes to many would turn me off...
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    i decided that im going to take the person to a STD clinic before i sleep with them, because i havent been with many people (i could count with one hand) and i dont want to catch anything.. so the next guy who sleeps with me be prepaired to get blood work lol... people are dirty these days... seriously.. lol..

    yes to many would turn me off...

    I think this is smart, though I've never done it.

    But, once you are in the relationship, then what? Do you play it safe forever, or do you have the test every six months, or what? Because it only takes one indiscretion...
  • MallorieGreiner
    MallorieGreiner Posts: 135 Member
    Yes and no. lol

    As long as they're faithful to me and don't have any nasties, then we're golden.

    There's a catch though. I've dated 3 guys but I've been "saving myself for the right guy" so they'd have to be down for that.
  • lostinthe619
    lostinthe619 Posts: 98
    No, as long as they treat me well and they haven't caught anything nasty :smile:

    Exactly.
  • angieleighbyrd
    angieleighbyrd Posts: 989 Member
    It doesn't bother me and I'm glad it doesn't bother my husband because I went through a slut faze.
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
    Not an issue.
  • originalkazila
    originalkazila Posts: 200
    I've only been (and still am with) one person. But the idea doesn't turn me off.
  • LuckyMiss3
    LuckyMiss3 Posts: 125
    As long as their mister hasn't turned green and fell off I don't care.
  • amandapye78
    amandapye78 Posts: 820 Member
    I believe in don't ask, don't tell.
    This!
  • BurtHuttz
    BurtHuttz Posts: 3,653 Member
    As long as their mister hasn't turned green and fell off I don't care.

    Hi, I'm Emanyalpsid, nice to meet you. I believe I meet your minimum qualifications?
  • mswize
    mswize Posts: 113 Member
    No, as long as they treat me well and they haven't caught anything nasty :smile:

    THIS
  • SVCat
    SVCat Posts: 1,483 Member
    It doesn't matter to me, I won't ask and if she's smart she won't ask for my number.
  • oh_em_gee
    oh_em_gee Posts: 887 Member
    I would be put off if it were like 1000 or something. That would probably mean our views about sex were just too different. But, in general, if they're disease free and ok with the fact that I'm not exactly in a rush to have sex in a new relationship, I could look past a high number.

    Dbf and I are both a bit old fashioned and both our numbers are under 5, so that's where I'm coming from. When you slept with 2 and regret 1, 20+ can sound like a lot.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    My number kind of puts people off, but I'm fine with whatever. The past is the past.
  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
    This is a hard to answer question.
    I'd like to say it doesn't matter, but really it depends on so many things. I am 24, and if i were to date a guy my age who's had a lot of sexual partners before me i'd be a little put off. Because let's face it, young people are not always the smartest when it comes to safe sex. If he's had a lot of partners, some of whom might have also had lots of partners, the odds of him catching something are pretty high.
  • My0WNinspiration
    My0WNinspiration Posts: 1,146 Member
    i decided that im going to take the person to a STD clinic before i sleep with them, because i havent been with many people (i could count with one hand) and i dont want to catch anything.. so the next guy who sleeps with me be prepaired to get blood work lol... people are dirty these days... seriously.. lol..

    yes to many would turn me off...


    So true...
  • Gracerrr
    Gracerrr Posts: 139 Member
    I would be put off, yes, but it wouldn't completely stop me from pursuing an individual if they had grown as a person when I met them. I don't believe there is anything wrong with people who have high "numbers," but it never was my lifestyle choice. I believed in waiting until you were not only in love with a person but also at the very least planning to marry him/her. I also believed in dating people with similar values. Pretty strict, I know, but it's what I wanted and it worked for me :)
  • TigressPat
    TigressPat Posts: 722
    i decided that im going to take the person to a STD clinic before i sleep with them, because i havent been with many people (i could count with one hand) and i dont want to catch anything.. so the next guy who sleeps with me be prepaired to get blood work lol... people are dirty these days... seriously.. lol..

    yes to many would turn me off...

    I think this is a sound strategy, but for a stupid reason.

    serial "daters" are often far more cautious than people who have had a limited number of partners.

    And people lie. Your future bf might have only been with 3 women, but how do you know who those three have been with?
  • nataliescalories
    nataliescalories Posts: 292 Member
    i decided that im going to take the person to a STD clinic before i sleep with them, because i havent been with many people (i could count with one hand) and i dont want to catch anything.. so the next guy who sleeps with me be prepaired to get blood work lol... people are dirty these days... seriously.. lol..

    yes to many would turn me off...

    I think this is a sound strategy, but for a stupid reason.

    serial "daters" are often far more cautious than people who have had a limited number of partners.

    And people lie. Your future bf might have only been with 3 women, but how do you know who those three have been with?

    I'd still use protection. It can take months for certain STDs to show up on tests. So, if they slept with someone the week before you and their test is clean for you, that doesn't necessarily mean anything.

    To answer the original question...I think it can certainly be a turn off. I once had a guy tell me 120 (not in a bragging way; he was just a friend being honest) and that was the end of my interest in that.
  • robot_potato
    robot_potato Posts: 1,535 Member
    As long as I was the only one at the time, I don't see how the past number affects me, unless they caught a communicable disease.
  • Terasome
    Terasome Posts: 3,808 Member
    Ive never been asked and will probably never tell either how many men Ive slept with. I've nothing to hide just dont think it is relevant .

    If I was asked Id probably say 3-5 in my time. Although it is higher than that :blushing:

    Ive never asked a man either how many partners he has had, I dont want to know honestly.
  • CaliforniaSweetheart
    CaliforniaSweetheart Posts: 989
    No, as long as they treat me well and they haven't caught anything nasty :smile:

    THIS
    I agree also
  • sunman00
    sunman00 Posts: 872 Member
    you get to my age & you're grateful if they're under triple digits!
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Nope. It's none of my business how many sexual partners someone has had in the past. As long as they did it responsibly and are disease-free, I don't care. I don't judge based on something that is part of a healthy adult relationship.
  • HardRockCamaro
    HardRockCamaro Posts: 147
    I'd hope for a similar number to my own.
    I can count mine on one hand and I'd hope for the same.

    If their number was vastly higher than mine I'd suspect we have different values.

    I'm not saying their values are wrong, just different to mine, and it's an important area to me so I'd rather find someone who shares my way of thinking.


    However...

    That's not to say I wouldn't be with someone who has a much higher number than me, but I'd rather just not think about it and focus on what we had.

    So put off as in absolutely would not date? No.
    Do I prefer a very low number? Yes
    Is that based on some double standard? No.
  • n2thenight24
    n2thenight24 Posts: 1,651 Member
    As long as I don't have to hear about anyone from that list, and can pretend easily that none of them ever existed, all is well : )

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